Today, while working as a swim instructor, I started singing the hokey pokey to get all the kids used to putting their faces in the water. One of the kids was covering his ears. When I asked him why, he said "because you were singing." He's 3. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was working as a swim instructor for kids. Teaching them not to be afraid of the water, I put my face in the water and blew bubbles. I asked them to try it. All of them did, except for one. I went right to him and blew bubbles again. He then said to me, "But I just peed in that water." FML
Today, I saw my 4 year-old daughter singing and dancing, so I decided to sing along. As soon as I started singing she said, without blinking her eyes and super calmly, "Could you please stop doing that?" FML
Today, I was teaching swim lessons. I got felt up by a 6 year-old boy. Three times. FML
Today, I was playing some children's music while I cooked so my two-year-old was entertained a little. I started dancing while cooking and she looked at me with a straight face and said, "Mama... Don't dance." FML
Today, I was at work at a preschool. I was sitting outside with the kids and was getting bored so I started singing. One of the little girls runs up and puts her hand over my mouth and tells me to stop. I'm in a select chorus at my highschool and plan to major in choral studies in college. FML
Today, while working my job as a swim instructor, my coworker sprayed me with the hose. I instinctively held up what I was holding to block the cold water. I was holding a 4 year-old. FML
Today, I had to go take swimming lessons because my mom has a fear I'll drown and I'm totally afraid of swimming anyway and never get anywhere near water. My instructor? A high school classmate of mine. My fellow swimming classmates? 5 and 6 year old kids. FML
Today, I got chewed out by a parent for putting her kid underwater. I teach swim lessons. FML
Today, I was babysitting a four-year-old girl, when I came across a toy that sang the Macarena. For fun, I decided to teach her the dance. When she showed her parents, instead of putting her hands on her backside and turning, she decided to bend over and moon them. FML
Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML
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Top comments
Meeeooowww 9
Sing louder until he goes under
ShadowFlame275 18
That's a sign.
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Comments (48)
ShadowFlame275 18
That's a sign.
Jake_Hale 7
OMG OP you should try to come up with a way to kick him out of swimming. That was really rude and hurtful :(
Noremac42 8
OP you deserve it for trying to drown 3 year olds to the tune of the hokey pokey.
Slawter16 24
#13 - Kicking him out of swimming just for being honest and saying that someone's singing is bad seems pretty dramatic..
niallo 23
#13. Kids are brutally honest. They don't have an internal editor yet. You don't punish them for it. OP, take the not so subtle hint. Stop Singing.
hcollins1 18
13, you've never been around young children much have you? Children that young will say anything that comes to their mind and don't know when to not say such things like that.
Meeeooowww 9
Sing louder until he goes under
webbface 25
Jeez kids are little ***** today!
Kelsey_709 9
@33 Harsh, but true. If parents would get off their iPhones and iPads and Mac books and shit for just a minute and pay attention to their kids, maybe they'd learn a couple manners here and there.
HortonThelephant 15
The man knows what he likes when it comes to find music.
Rhian00 17
My niece does that. She's 3. It's just children :P
SexyQueen0905 24
I'm confused. What does his age have to do with anything? I recognized bad singing at a young age. Just take it as a sign.
Queensland 27
At 3, kids don't know all of the words in our vocabulary and how to speak fluently yet. The fact that the kid said OP didn't like her singing, plus the fact that kids tell the truth, would be a big kick in the balls.
hcollins1 18
Because 3 year olds have the balls to say something like that, but people our age, well most have the decency not to say anything like that.
Rhian00 17
Children at about that age don't realise what all words mean yet and to them, sometimes when they say things like 'I don't like your singing' etc. they are trying the waters ( :P ) they are testing their boundaries and seeing how far they can go without being told off. This lasts until the teenage years. At such an early age though, they don't necessarily mean to be cruel and don't fully understand when they have been.
Wiz_Of_Oz 17
Use this discovered talent at poor singing to your advantage. It is a well known fact that water suppresses and distorts most sound. You want their heads in the water? Sing worse. You have set their expectations that your singing is bad. Start singing inexplicably worse, but do it subtly enough that they don't catch on.
Wizardo 34
If you sound anything like James Blunt I don't blame the kid but hearing that you can't sing hurts, I understand...
ariellove1992 8
Do simon says
HeartOfLead 24
Don't be ashamed OP, now you have leverage.
ThatsMyPie 20
Evidently, you've never taught swim lessons. It doesn't matter how short of a time they're in the water. The goal is to get them accustomed to it. If short periods of time will help, then one should do it. What's more? Playing games and singing songs ease the kids into it. OP knows how to teach... If only she could sing, too.