Anonymous
New York, United States
Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
FunTimes
Canada
Today, my mom got drunk and tried to push me off a ladder. FML
Deadcat101
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
Winnipeg, Canada
Home sweet home
Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa, and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML
driverboy
United States
Today, I had to pick up and drive home a couple of drunk bitches. Unfortunately, one of these drunk bitches was my mother. FML
ouch
United States
Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML
Ohkourt
Mommy dearest
Today, I woke up only to find my half-naked drunk mother in my living room, talking in her sleep about how much she hates me. She still doesn't see what's wrong with this picture. FML
AnastasiyaNicholas
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
United States
Dazed and confused
Today, my drunken mother woke up after having passed out and yelled at me for ditching school. It took half an hour to explain that it's 5:00, and I've already been to school. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Get back here!
Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me!" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML
Anonymous
Mom! Stop!
Today, I woke up to my drunk mom trying to pee in the dresser drawer of our hotel, with my clothes in it. I woke up right in time to yell at her. Pants down and all. She started denying there were even clothes in there. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
It's just liquid fun
Today, I caught my mom trying to get secretly smashed out of her brain-box on booze at 8:00 a.m. FML
No-Sleep Nellie
Waterloo, United States
Today, my mother woke me up by loudly vacuuming the house. I had to work the next morning, so I asked her what she was thinking. She told me that if I was really tired and needed sleep, I wouldn't have woken up. It was 3 AM. FML
Top comments
BingleBop 18
At least the lawn is clean now?
ElementaryEdGuy 18
I need to clean my house. Maybe I should get drunk for motivation.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (129)
GoBigRed 6
Your vacuum must have one long ass cord
sjbartholome 14
extension cord
crazytwinsmom 25
Or rechargeable.
False_Stupidity 42
I just got the mental image of someone crawling around, vacuuming the lawn with a dust buster.
communisttaco 16
Outdoor plugs or battery operated
HAMY_fml 23
Must have been a good party
buckdharma 38
Op, please release the dust bunnies.
Mauskau 36
I'm so glad we don't have a lawn.
mybubbles2000 13
Please tell me you took a picture of that.
haddiej 21
She'll never get all the dirt out...
amisenho 11
It's amazing how some people don't know of all the bugs, grime, and dirt that exist in an uncleaned lawn. They tend to miss that part of the cleaning process.
weveallbeenthere 30
she just wanted to get the dirt off of it.
BooItsLauren 4
How do you know she wasn't purposely doing it?
odamaliekh 26
I hope this isn't something that happens on a regular basis.
md101 18
She must've been shredded.