Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in school when I spotted my girlfriend in the hallway. I wanted to be all romantic and grab her like guys do in movies. I grabbed her wrist forcefully and pulled her out of the crowd. As I quickly leaned in to kiss her, I broke her nose. FML
Today, I went in for a hug with my friend, but she leaned in for a kiss on the cheek at the same time. What followed was a full-on awkward face collision where I ended up kissing her on the lips. We both stood there, staring at each other before I muttered, “Sorry, gross." She really took it personally. FML
Today, I snuck up on my girlfriend to give her a kiss. Only after I planted a big one did I realize it was not my girlfriend, or even a girl for that matter. FML
Today, while walking through the halls of my high school, my boyfriend and I shared a quick kiss. A young teacher walked by and told us to stop due to Personal Display of Affection rules at our school. She then looked at my boyfriend and told him he could do so much better. FML
Today, I had a guest at my house. I stood up to shake her hand and kiss her on both cheeks, which is common in my culture. When she was kissing my cheeks, I went the opposite way from her and I ended up kissing her on the lips instead. Her eyes went big and I ran away. FML
Today, I was saying goodbye to a friend after a long day out. I went for a hug, and as I pulled away, I kissed her on the cheek for some reason. Realising it was an awkward mistake, I pulled back even more and said, "Sorry, I thought you were my mum." She looked at me confused, and we both stood there in complete silence for what felt like hours. FML
Today, I was walking into my school and I saw two girls kissing. Being a lesbian myself, and thinking it would be cute, I winked at them. I guess one of them had a history of cheating with a girl who looked just like me, because her girlfriend came up and punched me in the face. FML
Today, I was making out with some girl at a party and noticed that she wasn't very good at it. I tried to say, "You kiss like a 16 year-old doing it for the first time" but ended up saying, "You kiss like a 16 year-old." Upon saying that, a dozen people turned and looked at me, giving weird looks. FML
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to declare my love to the girl I have a crush on. I guess I shouldn't have gone and kissed her without warning, because now my face is covered with slap marks, and I had to explain myself at the police station for sexual harassement. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
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Top comments
tmrwisanotherday 1
Grow up boy, grab her , pull her in and plant one on her lips.
sakforduc 0
At least u didn't headbutt her by accident.
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Comments (103)
bluebell707 13
Naww ):
azpallen 0
Haha you just got teached!
HerpYourDerp 7
Socially Awkward Penguin strikes again.
n_epic_fail 14
You'd probably have been better off accidentally giving her a recite for your condoms and lube purchases.
HetaliaFreak 10
I see what you did there!
AnonymousTroll 2
How the hell can you miss kissing someone on the cheek?
StopDropNRoll 11
52 they dodge it?
Symmetry88 0
22- fml reference xD
AVainAttempt 0
#22 for the win. Loool.
herrobear 0
I don't even understand... How old are you and how do you miss?
upyourzlolz 11
Atleast you're not failing school. Hopefully.
LiveLaughFML 10
kissing someone's cheek leads to kissing someone's lips which leads to making out which leads to second base and feeling people up which leads to no clothes which leads to sex. the moral of the story is - don't kiss someone's cheek! or you will get pregnant and die.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
More like, "Don't live - you will die."
HetaliaFreak 10
"Don't have sex. Because you WILL get chlamydia, and die."
Fruit_Dealer 9
God damn it another pointless "at least" comment.. I'll sound like a troll but it wasn't funny, nor intelligent. Please don't comment to be in the first ones, even though you have nothing to say.
ThreeSheetsGone 12
Living is the leading cause of death all around the world.
ducttapewallet 7
And marriage is the leading cause of divorce.
Cian_1 28
It'd be a shame if he was failing, as well. :P
CoteDePablo 0
Lulz.
xhiizors 0
Lmao.
sakforduc 0
At least u didn't headbutt her by accident.
MyMilkShake2Yard 0
At least.... **** it idk some good to say....
Jimboom 12
Ha ha! You just got Teached!
crazychick1269 7
taught*
Jimboom 12
Nope. I did it intentially that way. To be Owned by a teacher = Teached.
TheFlyingMan 8
**You just got-zed schooled, MUTHAFUCKA.
Bobissmall 13
Since when? Urban dictionary doesn't even say that. 1. teached A misspelling of the word "taught". 2. teached teached (teechd) –verb: past tense and past participle of "teach". Commonly used in Trinidad by the most educated people.
YacL 15
29- I learned something new today. Thanks for that.
MeganCello 8
Because Urban Dictionary is a totally credible site that we should rely on.
Bobissmall 13
My point was that urban diction has a definition for pretty much every non-conformist word, and that he probably just made it up.
Jimboom 12
#90 Granted. But who are you to say it is not a Colloquialism and you have just never heard of it being used before? Anyway, isn't that how most phrases get started? Someone uses it, someone else finds it very descriptive and uses it, so on and so forth. But just for you I added it to urbandictionary. Feel better now? ;-)
tmrwisanotherday 1
Grow up boy, grab her , pull her in and plant one on her lips.
ThreeSheetsGone 12
The teacher? Hell, I'd do it.
Teehee2 0
7 that sounded hot.
BD_Swingin 0
Which lips?
zanguard 0
Try standing still next time, drive by kissing requires good lip-eye coordination.
lilly98ish 4
Hey at least u got a cool teacher ours gives us dention if we kiss
zombicidal 11
same here we have strict PDA rules at my school nothing other than holding hands (not even hugs)
Potterhead1 3
we can't even hold hands at our school. I think Umbridge is our principal.
ikickgingers 15
Dention?
EPICROCKERNINJA 8
At my school, if we hug , hold hands... Then they call our parents and we get ISS.
minerfreak89 0
Same here. No kisses, hugs. Anything.
codyjohn17 5
Well that guy failed to kiss her soooooo, no rules were broken.
mexicotoucher 7
Ah, young love. So beautifully awkward.