Today, the girl I like sent me a Facebook message telling me how the message I left on her phone was one of the funniest drunk dials she's ever gotten. I'm debating whether or not I should tell her that I don't drink. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I told my crush that I liked her a lot. She told me not to message her when I'm drunk. FML
Today, after drunk texting a girl the night before, I sent her a message saying I was sorry for everything I said. All she could say back? "Those were some of the most normal drunk texts I have ever read. I'd hate to see how boring you'd be sober." FML
Today, I got this beautiful girl's number at a bar. After the night was over, I was pretty drunk and sent too many drunk Snapchats. When I'd sobered up, I deleted them. She asked why I deleted them, so I said because I was drunk and didn't remember what I sent. She hasn't messaged me back since. FML
Today, I received a drunken prank call from a girl I didn't know around 1am. I don't know what's sadder, that I carried out the conversation for 30 minutes, or that this was the first girl to call me in over a year. FML
Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML
Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML
Today, the girl I like said she was out drinking with a friend. I'm pretty sure she has been lying about all the times she has "fallen asleep" and could not talk, and is actually seeing other people. FML
Today, slightly drunk from a head-frazzle of a night out from hell, I sent a text meant for my friend recounting the terrible date I'd just been on… to the date himself. He replied with, "I know, right?" FML
Today, I realized that the only time my girlfriend ever calls me is when she's drunk. FML
Today, I sent a message on Facebook to a girl I really like. She replied, "..." It took me three hours to realize she'd actually written it. I thought it was just Facebook telling me she was typing. FML
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Top comments
ks0300 0
that is ******* hilarious. You just made my day
Golden_massimo 0
just think how funny you are drunk
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Comments (103)
qwaxalot 0
first
satanic_fml 13
fag
joshhhhdudeyeah 0
bitch
hahaiseeyou 0
i say dont tell her and find someone new
the_flirtt 0
ya that could work 8 but I say u be truthful bro
McMarlin 4
Play along...or risk unnecessary humiliation. Seems like an easy choice to me.
hahaiseeyou 0
19- he's not gonna get anything out of it though, she obviously doesn't like him if she thinks that
the_flirtt 0
wow 25 my comment is down there soo
samgar 0
Hahaha you must of said some crazy ass shit, FYL
SinShady 0
Next time she dresses up to look nice, tell her what an amazing King Kong costume she 's wearing. No biggie.
hahaiseeyou 0
um okay? well she wouldn't be thinking that if she did like him, it's just gonna make the situation more awkward
the_flirtt 0
ok ok true but you never know ?
myschyveus 0
wow op that's a perfect setup. send her this: yeah sorry I was pretty tipsy that nite lol. but u were on my mind so I'm thinking next time u can join me. promise I won't get as crazy. or sumthin simple like that. then u wait for her to say yes. easy.
hahaiseeyou 0
you make it sound like your so sure
BahahahLOL 0
Write her a song. Chicks always fall for that crap.
spiderbesideher 0
punk **** limp wrist
the_flirtt 0
how lol I'm just sayin ?
snowboarder1417 2
38 - I agree, somehow it always works haha
AlesanaLTL 0
go chris brown on her ass naooo or just tell her either one
hahaiseeyou 0
I still think he shouldn't tell her though, I think she would have said something by now if that was the case
AlesanaLTL 0
chris brownchris brown
the_flirtt 0
ok 54 you win geez ur impossible :)
hahaiseeyou 0
haha i was just making my point
the_flirtt 0
point proven !!
hahaiseeyou 0
good =)
ActionManly 11
Who the hell is disliking everything?! Seriously, get off FML!! On a side note, this will probably be thumbed down too.
FFML_314 12
I'm giving them thumbs down! For not commenting where they should. Much like I am doing right now. Now I must give myself a thumbs down. :(
bigredmonkeybutt 30
Lame lame lame. WHERE'S THE FML?? This site used to be good.
snowball20 0
go with "sometimes people r most truthful when drunk" then laugh it off n be like "what did i say?" if she feels strongly against it, be like "wow so should I drink more often lol?"
mixxanber 0
Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML
jaiyarai101 0
wat r u like 13? lmao
ks0300 0
that is ******* hilarious. You just made my day
alaskan420 0
3rd comment mutha fucka! op, your an idiot. what did it say?
green_eyes124 0
don't tell her! what she doesn't know won't hurt her : )
spiderbesideher 0
show your ****
recognizedd 0
ask her is she knows how to make sandwiches
MrPlopper 9
I don't even want to say it
meagy 6
Wow, I wonder what you said.
the_flirtt 0
well she doesn't really know if he was drunk or not soo maybe she might have feelings for him ?
unidentified_sta 5
Go in for the kill!
alaskan420 0
****, more people commented in the time it took my iPhone to post that
ZleveL 0
Indeed. tragic, which girl is you in the picture? :)
brennboo 3
hahaha I legitly lol'd at 12 hahahah
brennboo 3
waait diff comment? idk it ran awayy oh wel haha
a_girl_i_know 0
just tell her the truth
Casrein 0
YDI for being messeged on shitbook
JohnathannnS 0
haha fyl