Today, I went to a new bar downtown with some friends. I was a little buzzed and had to pee so bad. I rushed into the bathroom and as I sat down I felt a squish on my upper thigh. Turns out the last person in the stall decided to take a shit on the toilet seat. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML
Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML
Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML
Today, I had to piss really bad, so we stopped at a gas station. I guess I had to pee so bad that I didn't think to check the PUBLIC toilet. My mom went in after me and when she got back in the car, she asked me if I'd pooped, which I hadn't, then she told me that the seat was covered in it. Actual shit. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom at a friend’s house, used the toilet paper, and realized there was none left on the roll. I grabbed a replacement pack but it was all the way on the top shelf that was too high for me. I stood on tiptoes, balancing precariously on the toilet lid when it suddenly flipped down, knocking me off, and splashing pisswater everywhere. FML
Today, while in the airport waiting to board, I got the sudden urge to pee, so I ran to the bathroom feeling like my bladder was about to burst. I was so focused on relieving my bladder that I failed to notice the diarrhea covering the toilet seat and the wall behind it until I was sitting in it. FML
Today, I went to take a dump at work, but the last person in the stall didn't flush. As I flushed for him, the shitty water splashed on my face. Some went in my mouth. FML
Today, while getting on a city bus, I sat down on a urine-soaked seat. FML
Today, in a public toilet, I got to experience a guy high out of his mind kicking in my locked stall door and puking all over me. FML
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Top comments
oh_dee 0
why would you sit on the seat in a public restroom? GROSS!
ddrluna 2
You people are retarded. Do a little research. The hard, cold plastic of toilet seats aren't fertile breeding ground. A simple search on google will tell you that your own personal cell phone is filthier than toilet seats. Besides, what are our immune systems for, anyway? Bunch of *******, I swear.
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Comments (180)
SusanaSaysRawrxD 0
Why would you sit on a seat in a public bathroom? Hover, use the film sheet, or cover it with toilet paper. Nevermind the crap (no pun intended) that you saw on the seat, you should be worried about what you DIDN'T see on the seat. YDI for drinking, and FML for for sitting in shit. but seriously, never touch a public toilet..especially with your genitals. I mean, infection much? D:
saailaway 0
dude, thats ******* discusting
twindaddy 0
I really want to sympathize with you, but how do you sit on a toilet without looking at it first? Do you just assume the seat will be down? I always look before I sit especially with public restrooms because you don't know what kind of present will be waiting for you.
ManganeseDream 0
YDI for being a complacent woman. Fancy ass clean bathrooms, now where are you? Covered in someone else's shit!
Bullshet 0
LOL I'm so faving this!
burnhamt23 0
I realize that your toothebrush probably has more bacteria on it than a toilet seat, but I still can't bring myself to sit directly on it. Use toilet paper...
sickinlove13 0
Did you not see that when you walked into the stall? Or after closing the door and turned to take one or two steps to the toilet? Or did you just go into the stall and back up onto the toilet?
dustbunny10 0
www I would never sit on a public toilet to began with! ur fault for not checking too! UFO
rallets 23
why didnt you check before you sat on the toilet? *looks at gender* oh. now i understand.
sickinlove13 0
What, exactly, are you implying?
MeganH0LLYW00D 0
Women are idiots... x)
1234five 0
mmm so tasty