Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to a new bar downtown with some friends. I was a little buzzed and had to pee so bad. I rushed into the bathroom and as I sat down I felt a squish on my upper thigh. Turns out the last person in the stall decided to take a shit on the toilet seat. FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML
Today, I woke up needing to wee. I was at my boyfriend's and didn't want to wake him, so I sat on the edge of the toilet and peed as quietly as possible. I realised after that I'd sat too far over and had peed on the floor. There was no loo paper. FML
Today, I had diarrhea in a public bathroom. When I was finished, I noticed that someone had pissed all over the toilet paper. FML
Today, I woke up desperately needing to pee. I sat up in bed, naked, and tried to decide if I should get dressed, or run for it and hope no one saw me. I guess I took too long to decide, because as soon as I stood up to run, I pissed on the floor. FML
Today, I was trying to see how far I could get away from the toilet while pissing. Instead I tripped over backwards and pissed all over my face. FML
Today, I had to pee badly. I went into a stall and sat down. Only until after I'd peed, I realized that I didn't have any toilet paper. I waddled to the next stall with my pants down to get more toilet paper, believing that the bathroom was empty. It wasn't. FML
Today, I was shopping in a mall when I needed to go to the bathroom. One of the toilets was out of order, so I went to the other toilet. After that, there was no toilet paper, so when I saw tissue in the sink, I left the stall with my pants down and someone saw me. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML
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Top comments
ojoRojo 27
Maybe try a toilet seat cover next time? Or a layer of toilet paper if covers aren’t available
rotflqtms_ 21
Was kinda hoping you peed on your pants. A little wipe and a toilet seat cover or tissues would have done the job. Now that bathroom really IS unsanitary... thanks to you...
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Comments (8)
ojoRojo 27
Maybe try a toilet seat cover next time? Or a layer of toilet paper if covers aren’t available
rotflqtms_ 21
Was kinda hoping you peed on your pants. A little wipe and a toilet seat cover or tissues would have done the job. Now that bathroom really IS unsanitary... thanks to you...
Yudith 28
Lift the toilet seat if you have to do that. Also, a word to all automatic toilet builders out there; we don't like when the damn toilet sprays dirty water all over the toilet seat when it flushes. I am sick and tired of having to clean the toilet seat before I pee. Fix it.
ImPickleRick247 7
How does one not check first after squatting over a toilet to see if they are “on the mark” lol…I’m not a female but I’m just guessing on the logistics of how this all went down lol
core01 30
YOU are the one's making it unsanitary! STOP IT!
Vanderdale 14
The toilet seats are only unsanitary because of hover pissers like YOU. Stop creating the problem.
bobsanction 18
People like you are why public bathrooms are nasty.
Even Neeve 3
Hope your nasty ass cleaned it up. Gross.