Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. The items stolen were my PS3, cell phone, laptop, tablets, and for some reason my deodorant and pillowcases as well. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my house was broken into. The burglar didn't steal my brand new laptop, iPad or TV. They instead made off with every single item of clothing I own. When I went to turn on my TV to try and distract myself from this, I found all of the cables in back missing. The police don't believe me. FML
Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML
Today, my house was broken into. Nothing was stolen, but my laptop had feces smeared all over it. FML
Today, my house got broken into. My brand new laptop was stolen, along with my flatscreen TV, digital camera, external hard drive and some clothes. Wanting to drown my sorrows in the Ben and Jerry's Phish Food ice cream in the freezer, I opened the door to find that it too had been stolen. FML
Today, someone broke into my house and stole all of my underwear. FML
Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML
Today, I took my new laptop into my house from my car, thinking it would be a too much of a target for kids grabbing it. I came home tonight to find my door kicked in, my laptop gone and my TV ripped from the wall. FML
Today, my house got broken into. Thankfully, they didn't steal anything. They did, however, move things around into strange places and mess up my underwear. I have severe OCD, so this is probably worse than if they had taken everything. FML
Today, I woke up to find out my house was robbed. He didn't steal anything of value, but he stole my beer, dog, and cat. FML
Today, I've been robbed. I came home to find my oven door missing. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
jtconcord 7
They probably used the pillow cases to haul the loot out. The deodorant is just freaky!
smurfsarwales 9
With the crisis, pillowcases are hard to find now a days...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (208)
that1guy1 13
Maybe they thought you smelled great and had a nice pillowcase. Think of goldilocks, it was just right and they helped themselves!
roeallen 11
Too bad he didn't come home in time to scare miss prissy pants off his property.
ceilingfans 1
Their spouse obviously sent him on a shopping trip. He decided he didn't want to go to more than one place.
YourEvilHero 12
gotta love the stalkers.
enonymous 9
Pillowcases to carry the items the guy was going green on his crime spree unless you want the thief to kill mother nature and use plastic bags. Deodorant because hey... Can't be leaving a scent for the bloodhounds right?
stlcards220 4
maybe u were robbed by a house elf who needed new clothes
nalia18 8
Maybe they mistook you for a celeb and your pillow cases and deo are worth a fortune
g_willikers24 17
#50 could pass for a female Bieber... No offense
gigglingalways 6
Literally thought number 50 was a picture of the biebs
mejiiaa 0
I would die if someone stole my ps3 ... Cod lyfe
rallets 23
battlefield :D
afcrewchief 4
They probably took the pillowcases to carry everything in. The deodorant... maybe they had a date after the robbery.
ZebcoGirl 0
Or they were using the pillowcases to carry the stolen stuff in, but I have no explaination for the deodorant. Maybe they were sweating because they were rushing to get out..
hubla 0
Did any one notice she said tablets?
murlocholmes 5
I hate goldilocks... "This ones too hot, this ones too cold" bitch it's not your food!
humorizer 14
The pillowcase was to help them stash their goodies. I can't remember the exact reason behind it, but I recall reading in The Anarchist Cookbook (or some other similar 'survival guide for thieves' type book) that a burglar should simply grab a pillowcase and stuff it with stolen jewels to save time or something. As for deodorant... I have no idea what prompted that to happen.
Driveshaft 5
They used the pillowcases to carry your stuff, and worked up quite a sweat hauling it all away
nalia18 8
Welp at least i have soft swoopy hair.... Good use of photoshop...
ZiivaZephyr 6
Smelly, thieving trick-or-treaters!
smurfsarwales 9
With the crisis, pillowcases are hard to find now a days...
sickjairo 7
They took the pillowcase, because that's where they put your stuff when they left your house.
xxGheTToGumbYxx 16
No point in harming the environment with plastic bags or garbage bags, at least the thief was going green! :P
GoArmy6624 7
Not really, I find mine laying on random peoples beds... /badjoke
apv0222 0
What I dont understand is why you didn't have your cell Phone with you...
bnvc 0
Hide the items well, Luke Skywalker.
instnt1nfction 17
Be quiet, Obiwan
xmayne 0
The PS3 was hacked already
bjdavey 8
A girl has a ps3?!
Bajee 10
Why Is that shocking? Wat r u 13?
dansco 25
Yeah and next week they can leave the kitchen and get jobs... Hows the 1950's treating you?!
sandythongs 1
geez moesus im sorry to hear that. wont god be pissed you lost the tablets?
aceman1992 9
ahaha that's great
hamguin48 2
I think you spelled Moses wrong
polocity 0
At least they think u smell good take it as a compliment
Decapitation 3
I would guess that stealing the electronics was just a cover up. The thief most likely smelled the deodorant on you earlier that day and decided, at that moment, that he must have it. Sure he could have bought some... but that's just too easy.
polocity 0
A criminal of depth. Sounds like a genius too me
jtconcord 7
They probably used the pillow cases to haul the loot out. The deodorant is just freaky!
sandythongs 1
they might of gotten sweaty.... they shouldnt of filled their mooching sacks with bricks from the factory hiest earlier
rattusrattus 19
At least the police know to look for a well-rested, pleasantly scented culprit.
Dallyni 22
Pillow cases to hold the loot, deodorant to throw the blood hounds off their trail!
Bcfrmkc816 17
Wow your a cute woman and smart
newborn85 0
Seriously on fml lol at least go to a dating site dude
rein 8
"Pillowless"? hahah im sure that should be the least of your worries OP. hahaha.
crinx034 0
Let's see here, they stole the ps3, that's alright I guess we can always get another, they took my laptop, it was going slow anyways, anything else? No? Well I guess that's oka- OH MY GOD THEY TOOK THE PILLOW CASES!!! GOD HELP US! NOT THE PILLOW CASES!!!!
tylersign 11
Well now you're pillow is naked and you're gonna sweat all over town. Pretty clever of them if you ask me. ;)
tylersign 11
I'm ashamed.. Your*..
tylersign 11
I'm ashamed.. Your*..
chili10 18
It actually is right as 'you're'.
Zomg_Okay 27
"Well now you are pillow..." Really, 38? Really?
tylersign 11
And a double post..? Unread that.
shrimp1234 4
You stole my profile picture you *****!
tylersign 11
Whoa. Buddy, let's reach a peaceful compromise here! Who's changing it?
shrimp1234 4
You.
tylersign 11
Psh, I disagree. Let's have an external source decide.