Today, I woke to find my laptop and printer covered in what smells like pee. My boyfriend then confessed to me that he occasionally "sleep-pees". It's like sleepwalking, but where he urinates on random objects. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, who has frequent night terrors, also sleepwalks. And apparently sleep-pisses on the bathroom rug. FML
Drunken antics
Today, I woke up to the sound of my boyfriend full-on peeing into our tiny trash bin. The trash bin was basket material, so the pee was all over the floor. Once he'd finished, he went to bed, passed out and left me to clean it all up. FML
Pissed
Today, I woke up to slight memory of my boyfriend leaving for work an hour earlier than originally planned due to "excessive sweat" in my bed. When I removed my sheets and took in a deep whiff, my olfactory receptors instantly knew that his so called "sweat" was actually his urine. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he pees on the toilet seat just to piss me off. FML
Average "alternative medicine" enjoyer
Today, after I unfortunately woke up too early and too quietly at my new-ish boyfriend's place (we've been together for about a month), I walked into his bathroom to discover that he's one of those freaks who drinks his own piss every morning. FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML
Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML
Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML
Today, I am now sleeping on the floor because my friend got super drunk at a small party then peed herself in her sleep. I was sleeping beside her and my clothes smell like pee. FML
Top comments
oj101 33
You better wake him up when he's sleep-pee next time. I'd be pissed off too. Urine your rights to do that.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Seems like urine a bit of a pickle there.
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Comments (79)
oj101 33
You better wake him up when he's sleep-pee next time. I'd be pissed off too. Urine your rights to do that.
Kkkdawg 27
...or pissed on
ZackST 6
I can only imagine experiencing such an event would soil the mood.
tacojauns 45
but it's a real thing miscellaneous/7966871
AKGirlinSD 20
I.want to know if this only happens after he consumed copious amounts of alcohol or it is really random? My friend did that, in my closet, but he was drunk. When I saw it in the morning, he gave me money to replace my items he ruined. I hope OP's boyfriend does the same.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Seems like urine a bit of a pickle there.
benmec 18
Guess what!? Maybe you have the same condition, where you sleep pee right into his open mouth. Yeah? See if that cures his problem...
boofgall 16
I cringed when I read this.
greenie213 23
3 - How about we at least try to be civil.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
#28- That's a bit rich, coming from a big green guy who smashes shit up all the time.
23Z9TZO 18
Cringeworthy, but I actually laughed at this comment. Purely because of how sick it is but made out so casually
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Yes, Noor. :( He sneezed....from the next city. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time.
kishorekumar_a 10
56 - YDI for being in a nearby city. You should have been in the moon to escape his wrath..
iChompYa 18
Wrap up all the valuables in plastic
Alleged_Cranium 7
Yep, have him wear a condom to sleep.
HeartOfLead 24
# 4 said to wrap her "valuables" in plastic, not everything.
mario2012 18
Yea...I call bullshit.
zero91 4
make him wear diapers when he sleep
sadistmonkey 19
Unless he takes off his diaper and then pisses while asleep.
marinus_fml 20
Wait till he starts "sleep - rooting" it's like sleep walking except he roots you, and he's not really asleep.
boarderlyne17 8
Sorry if I'm just being dense and I'm the only one that's really missing the obvious, but... What the **** are you even trying to say?
ladyLALAA 29
Is there really such a condition?
lulubelles 33
Yep, unfortunately my other half has this, he's only done it a few times though and usually in the bathroom luckily, so although unpleasant it's easier to clean up! He's totally asleep when he does it. Once when he was still living with his dad he 'went' over the bannister and his dad walked up the stairs to see what was going on, he got a face full, poor thing.
Pyapi 20
It's true. My brother has it. Now a days he just automatically goes to bathroom to pee, but he's still asleep. It was worse when he was younger, where he would accidentally walk into his closet to do his necessities. Reaaaally messy to clean up, that was, and horribly smelly too!
klutz44 28
It seems some people have a chronic condition. For most people it is brought on by heavy drinking.
JustForRetorts 13
Unfortunately yes. I used to have it and grew out of it. I once peed on my sister's giant Cookie Monster. No idea how this is caused. Just happy it was all in my childhood.
fsomelife 26
I'm guessing you're a Pee C person?
Conasaur 8
Time to buy a water proof case for anything electronic? Or just get him some diapers they'd both work.
JoeRogansBEARD 15
I'm guessing he peed on your profile pic
Conasaur 8
I was standing by and the spray just hit me it was traumatizing!