Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. Things got kind of heated, so he decided to take off my bra. They cooled back down when a bug flew out. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found a bug in my bra. Not a huge deal, so I flicked him out. Turns out he was a black blister beetle. I woke to at 3 a.m. to insane pain, as well as the water blisters all over my boobs. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend in his bedroom. It was getting pretty intense, so he got up to close the door. While he was facing the other way, I took off my bra and sling-shot it so that it would hit him. Right when I let go of it, his mom walked in and it hit her in the face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML
Today, I finally found a bug I had been trying to get rid of. When I removed my bra, I noticed what looked like a piece of bug on it. Apparently, the bug was flattened and suffocated by my boob the entire day. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were on a picnic date out in the country, things got a little heated. When we were switching positions, he screamed and started running around. Turns out neither of us noticed the beehive in the tree above us until his dick got stung. FML
Today, I noticed a small bite on my arm. I couldn't figure out what it came from until I saw a small insect crawling out of my bra. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having dinner with my family. He killed a bug and ate it. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to have some alone time under the stars. Things were getting hot and heavy in my truck bed and clothes went everywhere. After getting dressed, I felt pain. Little did I know that I threw my underwear in an ant pile. I got bit down south, a lot. FML
Today, my boyfriend's parents came over. It got hot, so I took off the jacket I was wearing, but I forgot I wasn't wearing a shirt underneath. FML
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Top comments
adamsk1 0
maybe if you shower daily that won't happen... ydi for being dirty
playalovegame 0
ydi for hiding bugs in your bra
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Comments (139)
adamsk1 0
maybe if you shower daily that won't happen... ydi for being dirty
STYLE_E 0
your making it sound good
massagenist 0
was it a BOTFLY ? see pretty examples on youtube and reply.
VeryNice329 0
no. 2...I was thinking of joking about the daily showerage. I'm just too slow, but maybe the op has decent sized boobs and a beetle or something got stuck and just waited until the right time to escape....
adamsk1 0
no way!! she would feel that! seriously, think about it! anytime you've had a bug crawling on you haven't you felt it and kinda freaked out a little? I'm deathly afraid of spiders so even if my hair falls out and brushes my neck or arm I'm lookin for a spider. seriously all she needs is a shower. haha I wasn't trying to make it sound good. I would have said dirty girl if it was a sensual comment. but this is just plain nasty dirty.
Jessi_Rose96 0
Botflies are disgusting little creatures. My teacher showed us the video. Ugh, yuck.
BABiiRAWr 0
I bet the bug killed the mood :(
parker330033 0
ha ha!!! that's funny!
debiasio69696969 0
gnarley if I was him I'd get checked don't wanna run into more bugs ;)
winterharte 0
There's no 'e' in gnarly >.>
debiasio69696969 0
your point?
kcarty01 0
there can be an 'e' in gnarley/gnarly if you want. either way its a weird-ass looking word haha
kcarty01 0
technically that would be a spelling lesson but..thats alright (: haha
dumbbitchhater2 0
god damn nobody knows how to speak/spell correctly in this thread
robdoggstge 0
dummmmmbbbb. haha that suks op
kcarty01 0
excuse you 22. rude. :|
HarmDis 3
You don't capitalize the first letter of every sentance lol. Very few people here can speak/spell correctly.
BearNick 0
Oh the irony 29.
kcarty01 0
clearly thats not spelling or speaking. that would be considered typing, writing, or possibly punctuating.
imdeborah 0
I don't understand why so many people demand perfect grammar on here. Its FML .com . Why do you care? Unless you cant understand what the person typed there's no need to go bitching. (This is to everyone in general, not just one person in particular)
massagenist 0
i resemble that remark. alot of fmlers have brained thier damage from smoking jinga.
TaliTubi 0
#57 you're as stupid as you look.
skullbashd 3
he looks like guy from no country for old men with the silenced shotgun maybe it is him
aznbitch 0
agreed 58.
eukaryote101 0
Why WOULDN'T you spell correctly? It's basic stuff. Now idm the odd apostrophe being left out, but please, speak in a coherant fashion. Unless you want to sound like an idiot, and consequently, be treated like one.
hellenn 0
haha i know right! i hate people who rite lke di
xXSc3n1cXx 0
itz tha fukin internetz we can haz bee ritin bouts whueva tha phucks wee wuntz =/ free country. besides, its not a book. we dont spellcheck
RoflDanke 0
Who cares how Jenine spelled it.
kcarty01 0
i dont get it...how did you not know?!? D:
whirlybird 0
That's just repulsive.
YUMmMm 0
41=WIN!! (love the FML of the bug )
srunano 4
^^ Thanks :)
yoyoforpeace 14
Been that long huh?
78euge781995 0
7th!
debiasio69696969 0
nobody cares stfu
mitsoi 0
I'm with 35 here
srunano 4
Be happy you weren't 203404938509345 yelling out "7th!"
debiasio69696969 0
preeetty sure there wouldn't be THAT big of a number lmao
JokerJohn7 0
I'm with 7th here lmao
srunano 4
@97, Lol I know, you never know, one day there might 0_o
playalovegame 0
ydi for hiding bugs in your bra
sourgirl101 29
Bugs in your bra! were they booBEES?
DanceGirl01 0
wow. what are you, seven??
sourgirl101 29
Nope, but it was told to me by a seven year old. Stop being so jaded.
chandlerthedog 0
boobees.... that's funny!!!!!
loser333 0
so u got wild....... anti flood protection....
BearNick 0
Reminds me of the cartoons were a moth would fly out of a empty wallet.
officeradvil 8
Yeah, wouldn't you feel it crawling around in there?
Andrew1122 0
#9 you're pretty
debiasio69696969 0
thanks (:
SirWhatsHisFace 0
YDI for trying to poison your boyfriend with a dangerous bug, just so you can get some money. I hope you go to jail.
Narutosuns2fan 12
Wait, what?