Today, I was messing around in my boyfriend's pants while watching TV. He was totally absorbed in the fishing show that was on. When the guy lost a fish, he got so disappointed that he became completely flaccid. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were hooking up while watching a movie. Just as I was getting really into it, he told me to move my head. He couldn't see the television. FML
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I slightly opened my eyes during it and saw him with his eyes wide open, watching TV. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend jacking it. He wouldn't continue and let me watch. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house. Expecting to get a little action, I was surprised to find that he had fallen asleep while I was showering. I spent my night watching television and browsing the internet while he snored. Loudly. FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend in the bathtub interrogating his penis and "drowning" it when it wouldn't answer him. FML
Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML
Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Today, I was trying to turn my boyfriend on with dirty texts. When he said "I'm horny," I teasingly replied, "Whoops, did I do that?" His reply? "Huh? Naw i'm watching sum porn". FML
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Top comments
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
do fish turn him on because they remind him of you? or part of you?
TheLetterZero 7
Guess you could say he was... *sunglasses* hooked on that program. YEEEAAAHHH!
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Comments (107)
j_cat187 20
mavy u should smell like fish...
flapdoodle 2
You obviously don't know how to handle a rod. Ask him to show you how to work with his tackle, show him your box and maybe he will take the bait.
TaylorTheBoss 4
lmao lol
rockyraccoon28 8
wel,l that idea flopped.
annabethjackson 0
Hahaha sux for you OP
nerdsgetmehot 23
I suggest turning off the television and demanding that you have his full attention during intimate activities. He might just dig that take-charge attitude. Maybe it's just me, but I feel like sexual stuff would be less passionate and interesting if one or both of you are absorbed in your favorite television show.
blad786 0
sounds like the fishes are bait to him and he's a gayfish
Hump_Zilla 0
wait till he's done...I wouldn't want sex if I was watching something either...women deny men sex all the time, but if a man denies a woman then "omg fml" or they think the guy is gay....YDI
premiermois 5
Don't worry OP... there are other fish in the sea.
Kanzy_fml 0
fish smelling pussy turns him on?