Today, I walked outside to find someone had egged my house and smashed a pumpkin onto my car. I later discovered that the perpetrator was my own 8 year old son. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
They grow up so fast these days…
Today, the car shop called me and told me an 8 year-old boy stole my car and wrecked it. FML
Ya winning, son?
Today, I walked in on my son trying to carve a bong out of a watermelon. FML
Today, I saw the pumpkin I had put out for Halloween was starting to get mushy. I went to put it in a trash bag when it slipped out of my hands and burst over my knee. My dog heard the noise, ran into the kitchen and attacked me out of panic. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son pooped in the back yard and used a stick to throw it over the fence into my neighbor's yard. FML
Overreaction
Today, I accidentally hit someone's car while in the supermarket car park. I left a note, went shopping, and when I came back my windows were shattered, my tires were slashed, and "FUCK YOU" was written on my windshield. FML
Dad jokes
Today, my house was egged while I went out shopping. When I told my dad about it, he immediately and casually admitted to being the one who did it, asking, "You got a fucking problem with that, son?" I don't know if he's just messing with my head, or if he really did do it. FML
Today, my son thought he'd take my new car for a drive without permission. He accelerated straight into a tree, reversed into a lamppost and then accelerated again into the neighbours car. FML
Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML
Today, I got into a fight with my mom over the chores, and stormed out. When I returned later, I found the house had been egged. My mom told my dad she saw me do it, and he won't believe my side of the story. He says I'll be lucky if I see sunlight this summer. FML
Today, I came home from work and found my house egged, and bricks thrown through my windows. I called the police, and submitted a report. Later that night, I heard the doorbell ring. Nobody was at the house, but there was a note saying "Sorry, wrong house". FML
Top comments
drippingfaucet 0
smart kid
ugh_a_lug 7
he could lift a pumpkin onto your car?
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Comments (199)
wckdinten 0
lol that sucks
wckdinten 0
lol that sucks
SwiftKick2DA 0
beat his ass! and make him clean that shit up! then beat his ass again!
Selena_is_back 7
*facepalm*
yuggi1 11
Grab him by the ear and lock him in the closet without supper. >:)
twitch851 9
make him feel like Harry potter>:}
captainkrispy 2
u need to beat his a- donkey butt
Selena_is_back 7
spanking/punching/hitting is considered child abuse... it causes the kid to act like a rebel even more.
danisawesome 0
time to get the belt
HoT_TroPiCaL_LiF 0
hhahahahaha im sorry but dat is so crak-up!!!...ow man i would pull out the sandle about now.
Selena_is_back 7
I wonder what's up with all the: "hit/spank your kid!" comments...
Selena_is_back 7
I understand that what the child did was wrong, but what I'm trying to say is that hitting your child isn't always the solution to the problem. See what I'm trying to say?
yuggi1 11
A family is like a pack of wolfs. Kids will always want to be the leader... that's when spanking comes along. It is used to teach and leave impressions. Besides, spanking has never done harm to anybody (if used with the right reasons).
Selena_is_back 7
88, I still refuse to spank a kid for no reason.
yuggi1 11
Eh #78, I just realize that you might be coming up with this from self-experience. If thats the case FYL. Your parents must had been brutal with you...
iwadasn 33
88, I wouldn't call destroying his parents' property "no reason."
yuggi1 11
Lies! I respected my dad more once he started spanking me.
Selena_is_back 7
79, not every child starts respecting the parents after being spanked...