Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to tan herself with her regular desk lamp. She won't believe that it wouldn't give her a tan. She's 16 years old. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to blow-dry the sweat off her armpits instead of showering. FML
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML
Today, I used a tanning bed for the first time ever, in an attempt to get a base tan for the summer. No one bothered to warn me that you shouldn't go the full ten minutes your first time. Now my skin is as red as my hair. FML
Today, my son thought it would be a great idea to spray a whole can of spray tan all over my freshly-painted white bathroom walls as an "experiment". He's 18. FML
Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML
Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old daughter holding a lit lighter to the underside of a spoon, which was full of baking powder. She was trying to breathe in the fumes to get high, and later confessed that she thought it's how heroin is made and used. FML
Today, I went to have dinner with my girlfriend and her family. It got silent, so, noticing her legs were darker than they were a few hours ago, I wanted to ask her if she used tanning lotion. I ended up asking her if her legs were fake. Her dad has prosthetic legs. FML
Today, my 16-year-old daughter burned all her baby photos because they were unflattering and made her "look fat". FML
Today, I had to take my son to the hospital for drinking sunscreen. Apparently, he saw something on the internet that said if he drank it, his body would sweat it out and continually apply it to his body. He's 16. FML
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Top comments
theunwiseone 4
Well, she's not the brightest bulb in the box.
mistersheezy 7
I would love to know how long these "tanning" sessions last.
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Comments (73)
gatorsfan100 1
Does she happen to be blonde :D jk
FU2causeUFML 2
You know that every dislike was from a blonde person who takes that to great offense. lol
funkthat26 2
Jersey Shore; Making kids more retards, one moron at a time.
KennyMcCrmick322 0
Thank god there bringing back Beavis and butt head... Atleast that show actually has to do with music hense the channels about music
TGRandom 5
Was she dropped on her head????
jerico616 14
Well, I guess there are MUCH worse things that you could catch your teenage daughter doing!
THE_A_TEEN 28
Ok 1. Your daughter is stupid for doing that (unless there is another reason why the hell she is doing that) 2. Your at fault here. Maybe there is bad parenting in your mist, AND you manage to post this on fml embarassing your daughter, way to ******* go.
kyuhyunn 0
Are you retarded or...?
tona01 16
Or...? Come on i know you can finish your question
Devoo 7
Remember that Spongebob episode when he and Patrick had to get a tan to go to that party?
lmaoatall 6
If your daughter can't believe you about that, I wonder what your sex talks are like. No mom! The penis does not go in the ******! Yes it does!! Noo! It goes in the the belly button. Geeez
loserman67 36
I would bet it's safe to say that your daughter rides the "little bus with the dark windows" to school? How long did it take you to convince her that black cows DO NOT squirt chocolate milk?
ih82bl8 2
They don't!? Jk ^_^
gemno333 8
Wow. One question. Is it a standard light bulb? or a halogen bulb? lol
sparklecherry 4
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree mom. YDI for talking bad about your daughter on the Internet.