Today, I spent my first night at my boyfriend's place, and my first night sleeping beside him. I woke up in the early hours to him holding me and muttering in his sleep something like "surprise fisting". I'm beyond terrified. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML
Today, it was my first time sleeping at my boyfriend’s house. I happened to have an incredibly realistic nightmare in which I woke up to thousands of centipedes crawling all over my body. My boyfriend got to watch me scream and slap myself repeatedly. FML
Today, I slept in my boyfriend's room for the first time. I also wet the bed for the first time in a decade. FML
Today, I finally decided to sleep with my boyfriend. It was my first time and I was really nervous so when he was being all romantic with candles and wine I went a bit overboard and drank too much. I passed out. I woke up a few hours later, still a virgin, and in a puddle of my own piss. FML
Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML
Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to cuddle as we usually do. To prepare for this, the first thing I always do is dive into bed. This time, I felt something squishy under the covers, and screamed when I saw it was a Fleshlight. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Today, I was hanging out with my new boyfriend, and he took me back to his house for the first time. Taped to his bedroom door was a sheet of paper emblazoned with the words: "THE RAPE DUNGEON". I feel safer already. FML
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Top comments
wolfgold2 20
So, what happened next? ;)
Cwizer 17
I think he might just be happy and thinking of ways to please you.
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Comments (61)
vlalam 24
May be he meant fishing to surprise u ;)
JMichael 26
It may of just been a dream OP. But maybe talk to him when he wakes up and see if it's not a fantasy of his. Maybe you two can work something out.
colombiatti 14
Well at least try to act surprise if it happens hahaha
ShakeDisPlace 10
Sounds like OP's boyfriend had a dream that was packed with a punch.
Dumbledora 9
I had a friend who used to constantly harass me for change in her sleep. And do math. I honestly don't think it means anything. People say weird shit in their sleep.
Coeliacchic93 21
when I had math exams I would talk about math and write equations in the air while asleep xD
Fluffy283 8
I spent a year in college for massage therapy and I used to recite where different muscles attach to the skeleton lol people were freaked out
beaverteaser 16
hope he has small hands......
Effinusername 7
One time I peed in the freezer drawer in my sleep... doesnt mean I wanted to.
sarkaar 30
For all you know he was awake and acting like he was muttering in his sleep to prank you. :)
boredgirl123 11
Don't turn your back on that guy OP.
MortenM 17
That kinda depends on how "adventorous" OP is
Oliok 19
Awww but now it's not a surprise anymore