Today, I saw a Red Tailed Hawk land on my car and spend a few minutes looking at his reflection in the windshield. This was all really neat until I found out he badly scratched my hood with his large talons. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML
Today, I learned that my hairdo must look like a rat. I found out when a hawk swooped down and dug its claws into my head while I was sunbathing. FML
Today, while driving with my three year-old, I was showing her the different kinds of birds. I pointed out a bright red cardinal perched in a row of hedges. She squealed as it took flight, so happy to see such a brightly colored birdie fly. Until it hit my windshield. FML
Today, my husband thought it would be funny to drive my car through a flock of vultures eating road kill. Since a bird hit the mirror and broke it, I now have to pay for a replacement. FML
Today, an asshat in a Foghorn Leghorn t-shirt let his piece-of-crap mongrel dog do some sort of rain dance on the roof of my car, scratching the paintwork. He was a huge guy, so my backbone left town and I just smiled as if it was cute. FML
Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML
Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML
Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML
Today a big-ass hawk swooped down and carried off my daughter’s dog. FML
Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML
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Top comments
Niicky_fml 20
do the chickens have large talons? *adjusts glasses and sniffles*
Mi24hind 0
Hawks. They will admire themselves while destroying cars.
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Comments (100)
richard121212 0
well that's just unfortunate.
iAmScrubs 19
I've been looking for Amanda Love for ages.
barbiesaurus 0
I agree with #30. It IS kinda awesome, but also kinda sucks. Weird that it just landed on your hood like that.
HU4L188 0
get over your self its just a car.. u got to witness nature at its best xD
Ferretface 13
Ah yes, cars are so natural, aren't they?
HU4L188 0
hawks are
MissSwiss_27 0
thats sick*
hjanelle14 2
was it a new car?? cuz if it wasn't then I doesn't matter
RebekahBrooke 9
ai ai ai. poor car ): but hey, nature's beautiful! :D
SteelCladAngel 0
not all used cars are ugly piles of scrap metal.
talensledge1 0
reminds me of my middle name...my middle name is talen
lmaoatall 6
the hawks fml- today, I was casually soaring along, when all of a sudden, I spotted what I thought was my brother in this assholes car. so I swooped down and started scratching at the window to free him. it was only my reflection. fml
Jadian 4
That sucks that your car was scratched. I had something similar happen--a red-tailed hawk fell in love with my car (which was parked at a friend's house) and sat on the roof forever. I chased him off but he kept coming back. A couple of days later, after I'd left with my car, my friend found the hawk dead in the spot where my car had been parked. Died of a broken heart over his missing love, I guess. :/
Mystery_Machete 2
"Do the chickens have large talons?" "What?" "Never mind." That's all that was going through my head when I finished reading that...