Today, I rode my bike to the grocery store. I left my bike on the small bike rack they have outside the door. When I came out 5 minutes later I found someone had tied their enormous, growling German Shepard to the same rack. I had to wait for the owner to come out who then laughed at me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I saw a bike locked to a short bollard, making it very easy to steal. Being as nice as I am, I stayed, hoping the owner would come soon and no one else would take it. Then the guy who bullied me in highschool showed up, asked me what I was doing, laughed at me, took the bike, and left. FML
Today, I walked out of my college dorm to see that the intelligent person who locked their bike next to mine decided as an added security they would lock their bike to the rack, and to my bike. FML
Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML
Stranded
Today, I went on a 50 km bike ride with a friend. We stopped for a break halfway through, and locked our bikes up. When we returned, some guy had locked his bike to mine. We had to wait an hour for him to return. FML
Today, I biked to the store to buy a new lock, since biking is my only form of transportation. I left my bike unattended for the last time, only to come back with a new chain, but no bike. FML
Today, whilst on a cycling holiday, in a somewhat hungover state, I accidentally chained my bike to the back of someone else's caravan. As I walked away, I heard a loud scraping noise. I turned around and watched my bike get dragged down a long gravel road and through a pile of horse shit. FML
Good boy
Today, I was riding my bike, when I saw a large dog sitting in front of a house. I started to really crank the pedals, figuring that by the time it saw me, I'd be long gone. My chain popped off, I lost control and crashed onto the side of the road. The dog hadn't moved. It was a statue. FML
This is how I roll
Today, I went out to where I'd parked my bike only to find that someone had stolen my bike seat. Not the bike, just the seat. I had to ride my bike two miles home in the rain like I was climbing a hill in the Tour de France, while other cyclists moved out of my way in confusion, all while trying to avoid me. FML
Today, I rode my newly-purchased bicycle to Lowe's to look at flooring and back splashes for our upcoming remodel. Upon leaving the store, I found out that my bicycle had been stolen by someone who had bought a hacksaw from that store while I was shopping. They left the receipt to mock me. FML
The long arm of the law
Today, someone had put a lock on my bike. While I was trying to saw it off, the police drove by. I was arrested for trying to steal a bike and released four hours later when they figured out that it was actually my bike. FML
Top comments
HeyThereGorgeous 0
German Shepherds are beautiful and sweet if trained correctly. Clearly this one wasn't
Tehalon 0
You gotta admit that it's funny :P
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Comments (154)
Capnstinkfoot 0
Next time pull a marty mcfly & say " what the hell is that!" & when he turns around, kick him square in the junk
guitartech18 0
Isn't that from a Reno 911 episode?
altna 4
The dog owner is an idiot. And because he/she laughed that just shows the owner doesn't take other people into consideration. I had a huge dog - even though he was kind to everyone, even strangers - and when I left him outside a store I made sure there was space between him and the bikes. Some people are afraid of dogs, even small ones, and I want to respect that and avoid situations like this FML. I love big dogs but especially German Shepherds give me the creeps, the breed is so common and not always is the owner experienced enough to handle them - but in right hands they are great dogs, I know a few.
HeyThereGorgeous 0
German Shepherds are beautiful and sweet if trained correctly. Clearly this one wasn't
NotNegativeNews 0
#10 Hardly. The dog was growling.
setpratwet 0
It's more funny than Fml! If you find it FML, then FYL!
Phoenix_GAD 0
its ok. im terrified of big dogs, so i know how you feel.
monkeyneve77 0
This isn't too bad. But use common sense, do you really think a dog would randomly attack you?
thatswasup 0
I hear ya OP. When I was like 7 I went over to my friends house to hang out. When I got there their hugeass rottweiler tackles me to the ground. Hated big dogs ever since. (except for huskies and golden retrievers those dogs are awesome :) )
CourtneyDanielle_fml 9
Agreed with #17 Big dogs scare me too. German Shepherds are beautiful dogs, but they scare me :P