really
Denver, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I realized my boyfriend's right hand gets more action in a week than I do in a month. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
So frustratiiiiing
Today, I caught my boyfriend masturbating, again. Meanwhile we haven’t had sex in weeks. FML
Anonymous
Germany 🌶️ Spicy
Prize
Today, I overheard my boyfriend admitting that he's only dating me because having me around "sucks a bit less than fucking my own hand". FML
cantgetitupcantgetiton
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Quickie
Today, I realized that the amount of time it takes my boyfriend to get an erection takes longer than the actual sex. FML
jasmine
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I realized I have the most amazing boyfriend in the world. Too bad he has never once made me orgasm in the two and a half years we've been together. FML
Lilypad
Versailles, France 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I asked my boyfriend to give me a back rub. He claimed that he had a sore hand, so I retorted, "You have two hands, right?" Still bitter about not being able to have sex with me while I'm on my period, he shot back, "You have two holes, right?" I give up. FML
Shooter71
France 🌶️ Spicy
It's not a competition, but still…
Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML
Jena
Portland, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Libido
Today, I found out that my boyfriend would rather jerk off to porn than to ever touch me, even if I wear a naughty outfit. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Great time to try for a kid
Today, my boyfriend of 4 years complained about having to jack off for IVF. We haven't had sex in 9 months, I have to take hormone injections, and I'm jealous of his own hand. FML
Anonymous
Tallinn, Estonia 🌶️ Spicy
Same
Today, my boyfriend told me that he gets more pleasure out of using a Q-tip than he does having sex with me. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML
Top comments
zedjaleaf1 11
So does that make him his own right hand man.
ragnarok1540 39
Pull out your vibrator and give his hand some real competition ... In all seriousness, talk to him and see if you can work on the relationship. See if he can start using all that hand action on you, and start some mutual fun time.
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Comments (70)
Tripartita 45
You and his left hand should petition for more frequent action, OP.
slappygecko 21
I'd say that's pretty accurate to most relationships.
DashPlays 18
You could probably just ask him...
BrotherPhil 35
OP does - he makes an excuse, then goes off to play with himself.
Joseph24689 14
Ask him what he likes, go from there.
Dodge4x4Ram 46
he has a **** addiction which is affecting is romance with you.
Tripartita 45
Nowhere in the FML is **** mentioned. It only alludes to masturbation by talking about a hand getting action. The fact that you associate **** with masturbation is all on you, mate.
racejunkie 4
Someone is doing something wrong here!
N7Com 7
there is absolutely nothing wrong with masturbation.. he's a man don't be so sensitive we all do it. it doesn't mean he doesn't love you .. but he's going to ********** more than real sex is going to occur.
Caelophile 8
This means action from your boyfriend and not other men, I assume.
chefty722 9
I still think he's thinking of men and leaving you out the picture. You can't compete with whatever he's imagining.
Tannasgh 22
Whose fault is that?