Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend a few years after I slept with his boss and got him fired. He is now a multi-millionaire investor and won't take me back. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my ex-boyfriend, who I thought was finally out of my life for good, is now dating my new manager. FML
Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend from high school at the exact pizza shop we met at where I worked in high school. She broke it off with me after she caught me cheating with her best friend. These days, she's a lawyer who makes six figures a year. I still work at the same pizza shop. FML
Today, I ran into my manipulative ex-boyfriend at a party. We were chatting and I mentioned that the guys I have been seeing lately all turn out to be jerks. He said, "Yeah well, you dumped me and don't deserve to be happy." Apparently he has been creeping and scaring off any guys interested in me. FML
Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend in town. We broke up a year ago because he "moved" to Florida. FML
Today, I got turned down for my dream job. Why? Because my ex phoned the company and told them how bad I would be for the job. He phoned me and said, "Now you know how it feels to be turned down." We dated for 2 weeks, 11 years ago. I'm now married and haven't spoken to him since we broke up, so I guess he's been stalking me. FML
Today, we had a school reunion. The guy who bullied me throughout my high school career is now rich and married. I'm broke and single, and he specifically came up to me to point it out. FML
Today, after I had an excellent one night stand with a guy yesterday, I saw him at work. He was a client my boss was trying to talk into a deal. The guy recognised me and accused my boss of sending me to seduce him into signing the contract. The deal fell apart and my boss is livid with me. FML
Today, my boss fired me because I look like her ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, an ex-boyfriend of mine came to the jewelry store I work at to pick out an engagement ring for his girlfriend. The same guy who just a few months earlier ended our 8-year relationship because I wanted marriage and he didn't. FML
Today, I found out my boss hired literally the only person in this town who is an ex-boyfriend. I also work with my current boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
GhostFox 34
Get the **** over yourself. No one with an even mildly functional brain is going to have pity for someone like you. You cheated on your ex boyfriend. You got him fired. And now that he's doing well, you're acting like YOU were the one that was wronged? Gets some ******* therapy to get over yourself, get reacquainted with these things called "morals", and grow the hell up. People like you who portray themselves as always being the victim deserve to die alone.
boopingsnoot 25
I'm feeling pretty sure this was submitted by the ex-boyfriend himself…
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Comments (87)
GhostFox 34
Get the **** over yourself. No one with an even mildly functional brain is going to have pity for someone like you. You cheated on your ex boyfriend. You got him fired. And now that he's doing well, you're acting like YOU were the one that was wronged? Gets some ******* therapy to get over yourself, get reacquainted with these things called "morals", and grow the hell up. People like you who portray themselves as always being the victim deserve to die alone.
Cali 57
Too far, dude. Not cool.
Koios 30
Didn't sound too far, sounded about right.
oxker 7
Hahaha "too far" thats the hilarious. That was mild compared to what i was thinking.
lunalee4132003 8
I think this comment hit the nail on the head.
Matt Kesler 16
if I could vote thumbs down on Cali's comment, I would.
Ashamed_Sister 60
The content of GhostFox's comment is right on the spot and in light of this FML the aggressive style is not more than a sign of justifiable anger. This time I do not agree with Cali.
Cali 57
I thought GhostFox was taking the FML a bit too seriously (this is a humor site, right?) but if the community likes heavy-handed lessons in morality then I guess I'll back down. My bad, dudes.
acmariner99 25
That was rather mild. Thank you for containing yourself.
DarkAngelsBlade 25
To be fair she easily could have slept with his boss and got him fired after they broke up. Not saying that's the case but it's definitely a possibility.
J.T. Melanson 1
You nailed it, this woman (or man if they're gay, not judging) has some serious issues if they think their ex-boyfriend will take them back after what they did. I know if I was in that ex's shoes, I would tell any woman who tried to get me take them back, to go **** off. No way would I allow a gold-digger back in my life. Too far my ass, Cali is an idiot for even insinuating such a thing.
Casaundraaa 9
?????????????
at0micmin3r 23
LOL Why? Because OP is a WOMAN? #equality OP needs to suck it up, grow a spine, and get over it. He's not got the best things in life, Why should he take back used garbage?
Sighnexxures 8
rimpl
boopingsnoot 25
I'm feeling pretty sure this was submitted by the ex-boyfriend himself…
Havinci 19
I hope that's true
what_the_fu- 6
Who would take you back after you acted so terribly, are you a child? Karma BITCH
Dave_Davington 34
I think it's less to do with bastardised Hindu woo and more to do with the ex-boyfriend having an IQ above room temperature. Honestly, if the guy needs supernatural intervention to know not to take back a cheater, then he'd struggle to make it as a janitor, much less a high-powered investor.
Casaundraaa 9
????
jgriff79 23
Karma is a bitch, isn't it!
RichardPencil 32
Why should he? You ruined his life, but he recovered very, very well. He should take you back just to humiliate you in a big way.
tolkien897 15
I can see how you're sad that you ****** him over. he did great things for himself, and one of those things was not keeping a disloyal woman around.
J.T. Melanson 1
Damn right, play stupid games, get stupid prizes, this woman had Snoo-Snoo with her ex's boss, thought she could screw him over, but he turned it around and is now having the last laugh.
Lobby_Bee 18
Hard to get sympathy after what you did. Hope you learned a lesson here. Don't be a hoe.
Dave_Davington 34
Gee, I can't possibly imagine why.
Matt Kesler 16
people that play the "poor me" card when it is 100% their fault like this bug me to no end and it's sad that there are some people stupid enough to feel sorry for them.
Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20
Today, I ran into my crazy ex that slept with my boss to get me fired. Now that I'm rich, she decided, she wants me back. FML
RichardPencil 32
Today, this girl said she'd **** me if I fired her boyfriend. I canned the poor bastard and the sex was great! Now, she wants the loser back and won't return my calls. FML.