Today, I left the iron and ironing board in my room. While I was at school, my mom decided to do some ironing, and did it in my room for convenience. The iron needed water, so she took a water bottle from my dresser and poured it in. It was my secret vodka stash, and the iron caught on fire. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom was in the kitchen when her shirt caught on fire. Acting quickly, I poured my glass of water on her. Instead of thanking me, she yelled at me for making a mess. FML
Today, while ironing some shirts, my cat decided to hop up and investigate. To prevent him from burning himself, I instinctively moved the iron away and placed it flat on my other hand. FML
Today, I tried to make breakfast. I had everything cooking on the stove when I reached to turn on the faucet, only to find out that the head of the faucet was up the sleeve of my robe. After drying off, I went to serve my boyfriend his plate, but when I returned, the stove had caught fire. FML
Today, I decided to be healthy and drink a tall glass of water whilst doing my assignment that is due in three days. I managed to spill the entire glass over my laptop. I flipped it over and used a hairdryer to dry it off. While doing that, I managed to melt my keyboard. FML
Today, I was using my new curling iron to curl my hair. I was sitting down. Suddenly I dropped the iron and, as a reflex, I caught it between my bare thighs. FML
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
Today, I was refilling my lighter. Afterwards, I gave it a test light. I must've spilled some fluid because my thumb caught on fire. FML
Today, I was pouring boiling water into a cup, and I accidentally spilled it all over my hand. My mother responded by slapping me for getting water everywhere. My hand is scorched red, but thanks, I love you too, mother. FML
Today, I was sleeping in my apartment when I woke up to the smell of smoke. Alarmed, I ran out to the kitchen to find my roommates trying to put out a fire on the stove. As soon as they saw me, they ran for it, informing me that it was my problem now. They used my good frying pan. FML
Today, I spent hours cleaning the kitchen that my slob roommates always neglect. I scrubbed the floor, emptied the fridge, washed all the dishes, etc. When I was done, I was thirsty so I got myself a soda. I opened the can, and it exploded and sprayed everything I had just washed. FML
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Top comments
omg_18 0
not so secret if it was sitting on your dresser now was it. fail.
Zerenade 0
Wow, what a waste of a tasty beverage.
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Comments (154)
thor82188 0
a lot of teenagers like to put vodka in a water bottle, that's how the mom didn't know it was vodka. and i'm pretty sure she didn't open it and smell it. she thought it was water and didn't think twice before pouring it into the iron. and to #27, it's better if someone experiences drinking before college. if they have never experienced being wasted before college, they will screw up in college. but if they know what it's like, then it wouldn't be that big of a deal.
boreddoubletears 0
I like how you consider the only way to experience alcohol getting wasted...
babysexxplict 0
how can she not smell the vodka
AliceStar 2
Vodka doesn't have a smell!! If you don't believe me go smell some.
isyldur_fml 0
Clearly the mother's fault. even if it wasnt vodka, it might have not been clear water. there could be sugar or salt disssolved in it, which could damage the iron beyond repair too. Still big fail.
420hiadventurer 0
Your vodka stash is gone? Damn, your life is f***ed.
theshewolf 0
Your method of hiding it worked too well. That sucks.
ammali 0
Yeah, that's really weird that she didn't smell it. I mean, sure it wouldn't occur to her to grab it and purposely sniff, but vodka is strong stuff. Oh well, irons aren't too expensive at least. Now, if you're in major trouble for having vodka, that's another story. Depends on how old you are really.
FXCKMYLIFE 0
That's why you buy a bottle of flavored water Colorless so it still looks like water, but no one uses it for ironing The only way you'll be found out is if someone is in your room for whatever reason and gets thirsty and grabs that 'water' That's where I keep my vodka
Tikal_fml 0
A "secret" stash of Vodka on your dresser? Not much of a secret. :P
cireo 0
Secret. SECRET! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, its not so secret when its right infront of some ones face.
gravityplanx 0
i am continually amazed at how stupid the commenters on this site are... leaving it in the water bottle wasn't a bad hiding spot... obviously the mom didn't know it was vodka, right? Do you smell your water? really? i mean, i get it that vodka is strong, but she wasn't going to drink it so it never went ANYWHERE near her face... i don't see why this is surprising.... to #27 and #32: #32 is right and hopefully our country's drinking age will be lowered one day, but that doesn't change the fact that having a "hidden stash" of vodka makes you look like an alcoholic... you shouldn't be drinking unless you can be mature about it... and if you need to hide it, then you aren't being mature... Hopefully your parents are open minded enough to let you have an occasional beer/glass of wine, but if not then just drink outside the house... don't be stupid and have a "stash"