Today, I left the iron and ironing board in my room. While I was at school, my mom decided to do some ironing, and did it in my room for convenience. The iron needed water, so she took a water bottle from my dresser and poured it in. It was my secret vodka stash, and the iron caught on fire. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom was in the kitchen when her shirt caught on fire. Acting quickly, I poured my glass of water on her. Instead of thanking me, she yelled at me for making a mess. FML
Today, while ironing some shirts, my cat decided to hop up and investigate. To prevent him from burning himself, I instinctively moved the iron away and placed it flat on my other hand. FML
Today, I tried to make breakfast. I had everything cooking on the stove when I reached to turn on the faucet, only to find out that the head of the faucet was up the sleeve of my robe. After drying off, I went to serve my boyfriend his plate, but when I returned, the stove had caught fire. FML
Today, I decided to be healthy and drink a tall glass of water whilst doing my assignment that is due in three days. I managed to spill the entire glass over my laptop. I flipped it over and used a hairdryer to dry it off. While doing that, I managed to melt my keyboard. FML
Today, I was using my new curling iron to curl my hair. I was sitting down. Suddenly I dropped the iron and, as a reflex, I caught it between my bare thighs. FML
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
Today, I was refilling my lighter. Afterwards, I gave it a test light. I must've spilled some fluid because my thumb caught on fire. FML
Today, I was pouring boiling water into a cup, and I accidentally spilled it all over my hand. My mother responded by slapping me for getting water everywhere. My hand is scorched red, but thanks, I love you too, mother. FML
Today, I was sleeping in my apartment when I woke up to the smell of smoke. Alarmed, I ran out to the kitchen to find my roommates trying to put out a fire on the stove. As soon as they saw me, they ran for it, informing me that it was my problem now. They used my good frying pan. FML
Today, I spent hours cleaning the kitchen that my slob roommates always neglect. I scrubbed the floor, emptied the fridge, washed all the dishes, etc. When I was done, I was thirsty so I got myself a soda. I opened the can, and it exploded and sprayed everything I had just washed. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
omg_18 0
not so secret if it was sitting on your dresser now was it. fail.
Zerenade 0
Wow, what a waste of a tasty beverage.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (154)
deja54 0
And people will continue to scroll all the way to the bottom and make the same, tired, refuted "omg dresser isn't a hiding spot!", "alcohol won't burn!" (yes, it will; irons get very hot, it may not ignite under a spark, but a hot iron may reach its ignition point), etc... Props to #77 for the patience to type out all that. I thought most of those things, but don't have the patience. If I hadn't figured out what I could handle in high-school I would've been a disaster in college.
Corn_Is_Tasty 0
I'm not saying it's your mom's fault for finding a "hidden" bottle of water and not noticing that it smells like vodka. You see I'm saying it's your fault not because you're hiding spot sucks, but because why do you have Vodka lying around your room? Shouldn't you have drank it by then?
alotta_fachina 0
that's a problem, having straight vodka in your dresser... sounds like you drink alone. yes, FYL.
Corn_Is_Tasty 0
Oh and to #82, that's not necessarily true. He might not have learned about that by spending his day researching, I mean I already knew that from one of my classes. Don't be so critical this is supposed to be a website that you read and get some laughs out of it to make your day seem a little better, not a website meant to piss people off.
annabobana 0
ha this made me laugh
sober_slav 0
while boiling point for alcohol is lower than water, in an iron water flashes into steam upon contacting the hot plate. Until it contacts the plate, the mixture is homogeneous. When it hits the hot plate, both alcohol and water flash into vapours and still create a homogeneous vapour of 6:4 water:alcohol. As for iron being too hot to ignite it... ignition point of ethanol is 365 degrees C. So unless that iron runs at 365 degrees C, i highly doubt anything actually happened. IF that iron runs that hot then he's got other problems to worry about... such as holes in all of his shit.
craznazn247 0
A dresser does NOT qualify as a "top secret stash"
mattmag 0
who the hell puts bottled water in the iron?
DemoLover 0
LOL @ the fact that the OP never said she was in high school (probably is, but that's not the point). I definitely think better hiding spots need to be found for vodka. The dresser=Total Fail.
Thermotic 0
"I should do some ironing. Oh... it seems to need some more water. I think I should get a bottle of water from the dresser, because it makes more sense than you know, running water from the sink."