Today, I learned to never blast classic rock with your convertible's top down while passing an SUV full of gangbanger wanna-bes. That is, of course, unless you want your immaculate, newly detailed leather seats to be decorated with pretty brown and white milkshake stains. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML
What a ride
Today, I gave my new boss a ride, since his car died. I probably should have checked the music before I started the car; I'm not sure hearing "Grandpa pissed his pants again…" as the opener to a song made a good impression on him. FML
Stoking too close to the sun
Today, I was stoked to show my new car to my friends that I pulled into the parking lot a bit too fast, attempting to look cool. I accidentally hit the curb and ended up scratching the entire front bumper on a trash can that I didn't see. Now I have a busted up bumper, and my friends will probably never let me forget it. FML
Act of god
Today, I purchased a new car. On the drive home, gusts of wind blew up debris and pebbles and caused little chips in the paint and small chips on the windshield. FML
Today, I was in my car and stopped at a red light. A homeless woman then started to throw rocks at my car for no apparent reason. I drive a convertible. FML
This is our song
Today, I got caught singing '80s hair metal love ballads to myself in the car by the object of my affection. FML
Doofus
Today, I learned that if you're going to light a bottle rocket and throw it out the window of a car, you should roll the window down before you light the bottle rocket. FML
Road rage
Today, while I was reluctantly driving to work on a Sunday, some guy in a shiny Audi threw a plastic root beer bottle full of urine at my old Toyota. He didn’t even bother to put on the cap on, like a gentleman would. FML
Today, I drove my two kids to their friends' houses. In my convertible, looking what I though was my best, I slowed down outside a bar with cute 20 year old girls in front. My daughter noticed the speed reduction and said, "Keep driving dad, you're fat and mom left you for a reason." FML
Noise pollution
Today, I was hanging in the street with the boys, listening to some jams on my car's new speaker system. Some asshole from the apartments above me threw a bag of trash at my car. Direct hit. FML
Top comments
Aelaena 6
Wow assholes. I hate people like that, I hope you got a license yet that probably wouldn't do much.
zmiddz 0
Gangbangers drink milkshakes?
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Comments (243)
Poxag 0
do you know want gangbang means? I don't think it means what you think it does
scottyz1 0
Gangbangers eh? Then I guess it wasn't vanilla milkshake... You sir, have the wrong word.
usagi84 0
thank you #15 and #16. YDI for blasting any music. no one else wants to hear it.
lucey15 0
they're just jealous because you actually listen to good music
mehwhateverr 0
I hate them as of now. FYL.
deathproof_fml 0
I agree with #153 and #154. Typical ******* wannabe black rapper types. Makes me sick. They can take their shit rap garbage and shove it.
GR3453m0nk3y 4
thank you!!!!!!!
GodsNightmare21 0
I would've stabbed those bastards in the forehead.
CheezerX 0
i would of ****** thsoe guys up...plus dont play music too loud that other ppl can hear thats jsut stupid. cuz honestly no one gives a crap wat you listen to
doll_face 0
for the preservation of your integrity, i really hope you retalliated.
loldude1337 0
YDI for blasting music. Keep it to yourself, no one wants to hear it.