Today, I have to deal with being laughed at by my mother and sister, because they keep making sharp movements towards me, causing me to flinch. This is because I got mugged and beaten last night. They think it's hysterical. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML
Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML
Today, I woke up to my little sister strangling me. My parents accused me of making the red marks on my throat myself to exaggerate how bad it was. She's just "going through a phase", they say, and I'm a bad person for punching her to get her off me. FML
Today, my girlfriend totally emasculated me and made me a laughing stock when we got mugged and, instead of just handing over her purse like the guy said, she took out a stun gun and used it on him while I freaked out and cried. Now all my friends are laughing at me. FML
Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML
Today, my brother threw a mug at my head and threatened to stab anybody who came at him because I woke him up for school. I called the police after threats were thrown at my mom, who then lied to them and said I overreacted. I'm currently getting the silent treatment from my family. FML
Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML
Today, my mother called me urgently from the kitchen. Thinking she was hurt, I ran to her as fast as possible. She threw a wet cloth at my head and ran away, laughing her face off. FML
Today, it's Halloween. I get bullied every day and this was no exception, but this time I got beat up so hard I bled. Everyone thought it was part of my costume. FML
Today, my little sister was being picked on by some kids. After seeing one push her, I went over to talk to them about how bullying isn't cool and how they need to play nice. They beat me up. I'm 22 years-old and got beat up by a group of 10 year-olds. FML
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Top comments
devildog562 33
Go to the store get a mask, wait until they fall asleep, then wake them up with bright lights and creepy voices.
Acerhawk 24
You should "mug" them and just take all their valuables and hide them
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Comments (114)
brendejafulable 41
Get some therapy.
skittyskatbrat 19
Grab a blunt object and slam it into them. It's no more damaging or dangerous than what they are doing to you. Seriously, though...hit them. Don't just flinch, swing. Make them seriously consider antagonizing and stressing you out any more. They DESERVE it. Sorry such a shitty thing happened to you, and that you have a family of assholes making it worse :(
NNCR12 5
Omg that's horrible ! Sorry OP that really sucks !
krunchy_kitty 8
There's a name for that -- it's a neurological condition called hyperekplexia, popularly known as exaggerated startle response. It'll go away pretty soon, but they're certainly not helping. And it's *not* funny. If they're not listening to you, is there *anybody* you could get to talk some sense to them, another relative, a teacher, a neighbor even?
KayyKaylyn 14
Thats really ****** up.. I'm sorry :(
cappellaaa 23
that sucks op! I'm sorry your family isn't understanding to your situation
Danielvera212 4
Damn they are the biggest dicks in the world.
srngirl 8
What they have dine to you is not funny at all. I feel sorry for you
rzehnder219 5
Oh my God I am so sorry. Your family should NOT be doing that kind of thing and supporting you instead. I hope you're ok.
HJKM_fml 19
This is sick. I'm sorry, but your mom and sister need serious professional help if they think this is funny. I'm so sorry you had this happened to you, but at least you made it out safe and sound.