Today, I had to take an emergency contraceptive. I was talking to my boyfriend about it, and I told him that my stomach really hurt. His response? "Aw. That's just the baby dying." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, after being admitted to the emergency room for severe abdominal pain, my boyfriend shouted out in front of my parents, "At least she isn't pregnant!" FML
Panic!
Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML
Nice guy
Today, I was rushed to the emergency room in crippling pain, thanks to a very dangerous cluster of cysts on my ovaries that could rupture at any time. My boyfriend took this news as my way of denying him sex and broke up with me for "going to obscene lengths" to emasculate him. FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Awww Sweaty, don't worry
Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML
Bad news
Today, I called my ex and told him I was pregnant with his child. He was thrilled, going on and on about how much he wanted to be a dad. I had to tell him I was going to abort it. FML
Silver linings
Today, I went to the doctor and found out that I am infertile. When I called my boyfriend of 2 years, with whom I was hoping to have a future, to talk to him about it, all he said was, "So does this mean I don't have to wear a condom anymore?" FML
Today, I told my husband that while he was away I had had a miscarriage. His response? "If you can't take care of our baby while it is still inside you, how can I trust you to take care of it when it comes out?" FML
Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened, he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML
Today, I discovered my boyfriend has been slipping me abortion pills to "supplement" my regular birth control. FML
Top comments
jissie 6
win for your boyfriend.
allmine133 0
that's horrible. What a dick.
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Comments (248)
jissie 6
win for your boyfriend.
sweeetas 5
haha agreed pretty brutal but still epic win though.
OliviaNicole 5
I agree with 1 and 13 here as well.
bman134 0
as do I 19
the_pan1c 5
i agree with 25
MyChemical_fml 0
I agree, 35.
antoinemartinez 0
haha win for 33
carcinogan 0
lmaoo too funny!!!
guppy40000 0
using condoms and getting an iud or taking birth control pills is more responsible however if you are going to have sex.
zombunny 2
Apparently you don't understand that sometimes condoms break.
free2speak 14
Is it an FML because the boyfriend is stupid enough to think that the cell is a baby? Or is it because she has an horrific image of killing a cell. No seriously, I am confused because either way if it was emergency contraceptive, it was probably Plan B (or a similar brand) that prevents pregnancy by causing hormonal changes that prevents implantation. And even at that point it's just a freaking mass of cell called a blastula. If it's an FML because OP had a graphic image of "dead baby" stuck in her mind and/or thinking of it as an abortion then it's wrong because the "baby" is nothing more than a clump of cells. Unless you count millions of cells that shed everyday from your skin "killing babies" or even ovulation or masturbation as "abortion" because hey! they have a potential to be babies, then this is in no way a sad image. Unless of course, the FML is an FML because the bf is stupid to think it was a baby in which case I rambled on for nothing.
GigglePony 13
109, chill.
docscientist 10
109, shut it. It was a joke.
pinkballoon 0
109 can't take a joke.
tated4life 0
funny shit
jenn8504 0
agreed
mozeltov 7
109 is obviously pro-life
onlyyoushawty6 0
109 needs to take a pill
Manda_Goes_Rawrr 0
172 > everybody.
keilah 4
Not to mention the hugely high number of fertilised eggs that spontaneously abort themselves in the first month or two after conception.
SexyMcKittington 3
thankyou for that, unlike everyone else on this post you actually seem intelligent and well informed.
tmarie21 0
109-agreed! you seem like the only person on here with more than half a brain!
143ForeverNAlway 4
The fact that a condom breaks is never the condoms fault. It's always the people involved. It's either one of the two possibilities: A condom is too old. (An old condom is 3 or more months old) Or they are not using the condom as instructed. (A monkey can put on a condom properly--There should always be a little space at top) I think it's pretty messed up that I'm 16 and know this and, your 22 and you don't. Seriously, you should probably open up a book once in awhile.
Randuhh_17 4
What's wrong with being pro-life?...if people can't handle the consequences of having sex, like the possibility of having a baby, than they need to keep their legs closed. Plain and simple, then maybe they wouldn't have to worry about their boyfriends being insensitive jerks, or killing a potential life...
sarahgrace4 0
Dude you asked for it when you decided to kill a baby
abbyelizabeth 9
I really don't see how thats a joke and/or funny. There isn't anything funny about "That's just the baby dying" even though it IS just mass of cells, the whole thing that OP's boyfriend was cruel enough to put that mental image in OP is absolutely not amusing.
lululatenight 28
I still find it horrible. "Babe my stomache hurts" "it's just your unborn CHILD dying"
Prolux_fml 23
245 - The Blastula in OP's stomach is as close to a child as a flake of skin. It's NOTHING like a child at this point in time. She isn't killing her "Unborn child".
allmine133 0
that's horrible. What a dick.
PeteyPablo12308 20
Yeah that's ******! ...It is a little funny though... It's a good thing that you're NOT having a child with him, 'cause he doesn't sound like the 'father' type...
whisperingeye13 0
8======D
supertacowaffle 41
Well it's kind true...baby killer
Juggalette_623 9
@103 fail. there was no baby. just cells. learn about the thing you're complaining about before commenting.
supertacowaffle 41
its called a joke
ctbabyy 0
Wow.. he thinks he's a coolkid? Yeah, more like a straight-up fag. -___-
onlyyoushawty6 0
110 what if someone called you a clump of cells and killed you?
t765234 10
125- Actually, I believe that is called a logical fallacy, and as for your second post, this was obviously defending said idiotic fallacy through pretending it was simply a joke when it quite obviously was not.
t765234 10
173- ... What the **** does that apply to in this conversation. A "baby" is not a "baby" until multiple months into the pregnancy. The fertilized egg CELL would not have a conscious mind nor any life aside from the general functions of a normal cell. How would calling someone a cluster of cells then killing them, a conscious person, relate to the destruction of a fairly insignificant SINGLE cell.
fuk u 1
every sperm is sacred...
yennie 2
HAHAHA.. the funny thing is that I was half expecting to see that ;)
143ForeverNAlway 4
184 Seriously? 125 was joking...
beatleschick1940 9
nothing because my brain wasn't developed
callofduty4life 0
boyfriend 1 baby 0
BakNBitz 0
and there won't be a round two for the baby
madijohnson 0
like 3 and 44. kudos.
Alleged_Cranium 7
That's so cute.
Stumblebum30 5
What so cute about it? it's sadly true .
Alleged_Cranium 7
Anything about a baby is considered cute. awww
LuxAeterna_fml 0
Awwwwww.
ohmygaaawsh29 0
unless it's dying..
cptmorgan15 2
Awww
dirtyblond 4
awwwhhhh
Whitesurprise 0
I get it! dead baby joke.
Angelina3642 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You're boyfriend is so dumb...emergency contraceptive prevents you from getting pregnant, it doesn't kill anything!
georgiasaurus 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
lol you are clearly dumb... emergency contraception is a pill that kills the already formed foetus before it's bigger than a thumb nail
Angelina3642 0
No it doesn't dumbass...plan B is a stronger dose of the birth control pill which PREVENTS the sperm from atraction to the egg therefore preventiong pregnancy, which is why u need to take it within 72 hrs of having unprotected sex. The abortion pill does what u are describing. Educate yourself.
allmidnighteyes 11
Actually, the morning-after pill works by releasing a hormone called Progestin that stops the ovaries from releasing an egg. In addition to that, I believe it also thickens the cervical mucus and thins the lining of the uterus so as to further prevent any fertilization and egg-to-uterus attachment.
Angelina3642 0
Thx for clarifying.. :)
xIINotorious 0
maybe her boyfriend was being sarcastic....
ninjaniki 0
contraception is something to prevent pregnancy. like condoms or the pill. you mean conception. which can take several hours to reach the egg. besides, even if the sperm does reach the egg and is then prevented from maturing, so what? at this point it is nothing more than a cell!
DjeePee 25
What the hell are you talking about? A foetus doesn't implante itself into the uterus. What do all you people *points to everyone who wrote a dumb 'OMFG poor foetus' comment* think? That as soon as the sperm has entered the egg, a foetus immediatly appears in the uterus? That a girl is considered pregnant then? No. First: the cell will split itself a lots of time, than it will implante itself in the uterus and only than it is considered as a pregnancy. People who think the morning afterpill is the same as abortion, should also consider all contraceptive (especially the pill) as an abortion. Which it is not. (I know that I have written very simplistic about getting pregnant, but I don't know the good terms)
flickyourbic1223 7
wrong. so wrong.
NancyDeebensDPDS 0
goddamn it, stop saying foetis! it's FETUS! OMFG
NancyDeebensDPDS 0
foetus. sorry ^^
luna4545 4
O.o I always thought it was spelt F-E-T-U-S not F-O-E-T-U-S WTF is a foetus anyway??? is it like the unborn offspring of someone you hate or something? oh and everyone arguing over how contraceptions work and how the fetus is implanted..just google the shit! but conception does take hours if not days to occur since sperm on travel a short distance each hour. That is why the morning after pill works in preventing pregnancies in accidental situations.
ninjaniki 0
it may be spelt like that in your country but not ours. why should we alter the way we learnt English for your satisfaction? to conform to your beliefs?
catatonicsleep 17
US English doesn't use some letters that are used in other forms of English such as the oe letter as used in foetus and ae as used in haemoglobin.
djcoco5 0
you're an idiot georgiasaurus.
JokersChild310 0
wow this was annoying to read. so many idiots having sex and don't know anything.
lizzy8696 0
actually #11 ,#10 is rite at least according to my certified health teacher
itsmayabro 0
implant* fetus* learned* Doesn't matter what country, learn to spell.
Naominino 1
she knows her shit.
cereal_eater 0
^it's true!
TwitchingNebula 17
Thank you!
myfaircady 0
I'm so glad someone else knows this. That's why it's contraceptive.
musicmanbilly 8
Did you take sex ed in Texas?
addie_Cato0o0 9
Um ya, it just makes sure thw egg doesn't stick to the walls of the uterus... that's why your stomach probably hurt, it was softening the liner and shedding it. Doing this can cause cramps, migraines, bloating, and even bleeding.
ToxixShots 0
EPIC WIN :D
meegsiiee 5
and HE was the father of your baby. Wow FYL
brighteyes81 0
It wasn't a baby..wow
chlobo13 0
I thought he was rather hilarious. Perfect guy to be around. :) I like him!
lilmac99 0
OMG REALLY!!!! your boyfriend is a idoit ur stomach hurtin is a side effort of the the pill cause its so strong not because the baby was dyin. and unless u took a prego test how would he know you were prego? either way its not ur baby dying.
TheSithAssassin 15
That was a terrible response. Please try to proofread at least a little of what you write.
nebula748 14
I take it that with the user name "lilmac99," that person is 11.
jakiwi 0
Agreed -_-
docscientist 10
It was a j-j-j-oke-j-j-j-j-ooooooke
t765234 10
Wow Doc, I never knew joke was spelled with 7 j's, 7 o's, 2 k's and 2 e's, that was quite the enlightening post, I thank you sir.
skyttlz 32
I understood #15 just fine.
zourwolfe 0
asshole XD
zourwolfe 0
asshole XD