Today, I had to flush someone else's shit in the public washroom at work. It was so vile, I didn't want to get anywhere near it, so flushed it with my foot, only for it to slip off the handle and into the toilet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went to take a dump at work, but the last person in the stall didn't flush. As I flushed for him, the shitty water splashed on my face. Some went in my mouth. FML
Today, at work, I used my foot to flush the toilet, lost my balance, and ended up catching myself with my foot in the toilet. FML
Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML
Today, someone shat liquid poo in the hallway at work. Right. Outside. The bathroom. Another foot and they could have used a toilet instead of the carpeted floor. FML
Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML
Today, like every day, I flushed a public toilet with my foot. Today, unlike every day, my foot missed the handle and landed in the unflushed water. FML
Jobsworth
Today, while at work, my boss asked me to clean the bathroom. Someone had pooped on the floor and I stepped in it, dropping my manager's keys into the toilet. I then had to clean up my shoe and the floor, and put my hand in the toilet to get the keys. FML
TW: Gross
Today, as if having diarrhea at work wasn’t bad enough, my office’s aggressively flushing toilet sprayed me with my own liquid shit. FML
Freakout
Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML
Sneaky
Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML
Top comments
outthelabyrynth 21
Well, this story was a slippery slope from the start. Sorry OP!
lickastick 27
It makes me so angry when people forget to flush
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (80)
outthelabyrynth 21
Well, this story was a slippery slope from the start. Sorry OP!
byEyecandy 10
Really?
alex_622 22
What a shitty situation for you OP
njgohard 16
Pro tip: Shit puns turn out to be shit.
Jared900DUmpling 30
I think I can speak for all of FML when I say that this pun is seriously not funny anymore.
GentlemanBastard 15
Overused, unoriginal, awful puns are not tolerated here. I'm sorry, we're gonna have to let you go. Please clean out your desk.
alex_622 22
Yeah not doing that again...thanks guys
Chezzlova 5
Damn, you beat me to it.
mookiemookie01 24
Should have used a stick.
foxwasalamb 24
where are you gonna get a stick at work?
marcus369 9
Plungers
dragonkisses28 25
Idk #22, there are these people...what are they called? They use these tools with long handles to clean the floor... Sometimes they leave those things in a storage closet of some kind. Anyway, sorry OP. That's pretty nasty. Our toilets flush automatically, but every now and then you have to get in there and do a manual flush.
foxwasalamb 24
my bad 38, i forgot that "stick" and "mop" are synonymous. thank you for enlightening me
OBTrice 15
Some people have shitty manners
Rallred32 20
STOP WITH THE SHIT PUNS. Sorry for the all caps, but seriously, everyone who even thought of saying something about shit, don't ever, ever, ever ever ever ever type "shit puns".
soccerguy2o1 7
Shit puns
Rallred32 20
You. I like you. Let's be friends
ODST_Panda 12
At least its not taco Tuesday
lickastick 27
It makes me so angry when people forget to flush
meli1195 31
I just don't see how people forget to flush, especially their shit. It still boggles my mind.
foxwasalamb 24
i live with an outhouse, and on occasion i forget to flush if i go somewhere with indoor plumbing. it happens unfortunately
ahippienamedrae 10
Seriously. if you can reach behind you and wipe your butt, you can reach back there again and flush the damn toilet
sammiesorrow29 13
people's cleanliness has become terrible, and there's a prime example. public bathrooms need to be kept on top of by staff. after all they are working there and if there's a nasty bathroom, many people could leave without getting food.
GnaR_KiLL5150 12
Almost a guarantee that he/she didn't forget, just didn't give a ****.
Warmonger_Smurf 29
You put your right foot in. You take your right foot out. And that how you do the ewwwwwwwww!
meli1195 31
Trying too hard...
shay_serendipity 29
I think I see where you're trying to go with this but... what?
syed121417 22
Why did this get so many thumbs down? It was actually funny
MrEldritch 14
Put your right foot in and shake it all about...
kyuubi1 14
that must've been a shitty day
OysterPearls 33
Just like your comment.
cocainewhore 30
A comment cannot be a shitty day, #24.
A07 48
Good luck forgetting what that toilet looked like OP, you might want to look into getting a new foot.
scooterdude720 19
Comment moderated. (hopes nobody notices)