Today, I had a long conversation with my fiancé about how smoking menthol cigarettes is not a substitute for brushing your teeth. He still isn't convinced. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why chewing "shit-tons of gum" is not an actual alternative to brushing his teeth. FML
Today, I went to the dentist. After drilling my teeth for what seemed like hours, he gave me a long speech about how if I continue to smoke, the yellowing of my teeth won't be the only problem. I don't smoke. I never have. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend thinks brushing his teeth is unnecessary, because, "the world is going to end because of climate change anyway." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were kissing. Halfway through the kiss, he rubs his tongue along all my teeth and says, "You need to brush your teeth." FML
Today, my boyfriend thinks he's discovered a big conspiracy by dentists to sell toothpaste. He's arguing that nobody needs to brush their teeth, ever, because all the "new plaque" from food will dissolve the "old plaque", and the only thing he needs to use is breath spray. FML
Today, a friend of mine has stopped brushing his teeth, because, "animals don’t brush their teeth either." You know what else animals don’t do? Smoke a pack of Marlboros a day. FML
Today, I went to the dentist and she told me, "If you don't stop smoking, yellow teeth aren't the only thing you'll have to worry about." I don't even smoke. FML
Today, I’ve discovered that even if he brushes his teeth for 10 minutes straight, flosses, and rinses with mouthwash, my boyfriend’s breath still smells like a cross between sewage and rotting fish. I’m running out of excuses for not kissing him. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he stopped brushing his teeth two days after we started dating. Tomorrow is our 2 year anniversary. FML
Today, my coworker told me I should stop smoking cigarettes because it makes my breath "smell like shit" and makes my teeth look as yellow as corn. I've never smoked a cigarette in my life. FML
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Top comments
FreakinChaps 0
I can't even imagine what kissing him would be like.
Redoxx_fml 22
And vodka is a substitute for mouthwash
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Comments (166)
JayJaysGirl 0
Dear Fiancé: DON'T LET HER CHANGE YOU!(:
bartender91 1
he is unbelievable his parents should have never had him
ImSoEffedUp 10
That really has to suck OP. Its bad enough that u have to kiss a smoker, deal with the smell on him and his clothes.....and the guy doesn't brush his teeth....
DocBastard 40
He probably thinks he's as Kool and tough as the Marlboro man, but he has to know that smoking leads to lung and Doral cancer. Maybe you'll make a Lucky Strike and he'll realise his folly. After he's Camel to his senses, you can reward him with a trip - Salem and Newport are nice in the springtime.
goodgood_fml 5
Oh quit your yapping. You're STILL going to marry him so you have NO right to complain.
murdersquirrel 15
False, you can be married to someone and not like everything about what he/she chooses to do.
goodgood_fml 5
Marrying someone when you already know they are "insert negative quality here" means that you are willing to accept them anyway. Period. So, if it's not a deal breaker, then suck it up. Bad breath and all.
pagullarka 9
Kyla people were jealous of your last photo now you put this one, boy they will be burning up.
pagullarka 9
I think you look pretty in both.
gonad_gobbler 1
So would I be right or wrong in saying he's smoking hot? also, smoking is bad...mmkay
emba_fml 13
Hahahaha 60 are you really hitting on someone over FML?
fmlahahaha 5
Break up. Thats grimy