Today, I had a girl come over to my house that I had been texting for four days. I asked her what she wanted to do and she replied "take a nap". Becoming really excited I lead her to my bedroom and went to the hiding spot for my condoms, she was serious about the nap. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a girl invited me over to her dorm room at 3 AM. For some reason, I thought it would be a good idea to respond to e-mails just before. She said she was tired and then went to bed. I'm a fucking idiot. FML
Today, my girlfriend of over a year woke me up at 4:30 in the morning by sticking her hand down my pants. She immediately stopped when I was awake enough to reciprocate and said, "I couldn't sleep. I was bored. Talk to me." FML
Today, I was spending the night at my fiancé's house. He knew my period was about to start, so he asked if he needed to put a tarp down on the bed. He was dead serious. FML
Today, I asked my dad if my girlfriend could sleep over. He winked at me and agreed. When I brought her home, we went to my room for a quickie. There, I saw that my dad had taped multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing my girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my place, looking drop dead gorgeous. However, she preferred the idea of sleeping, and here I am on my laptop. FML
Today, my girl and I were in bed trying to nap before class. She kept tossing and turning, obvious signs that she was having no luck. Sweetly, I ask her if there was anything I could do to help her relax. She says "you can tell me a story about your day, that always puts me to sleep". FML
Today, my girlfriend of two years called me over late at night. I got excited, assuming she finally wanted sex. No, she just wanted me to make her mac and cheese and talk to her because she was ‘restless’. FML
Today, I recently started seeing a girl and I slept over at her house for the first time. Apparently, I still talk in my sleep. This morning she told me I whispered, "I love you so much." FML
Today, I went to work things out with my girlfriend, with whom I'd had a huge fight with. She told me the night before to come over at noon and that she would be awake. I unlocked the door to see that the place was a mess. She'd thrown a party and was still passed out naked next to her boss. FML
Today, I got to meet the guy that I have been talking to over a dating website. We were having a great time, at least until I managed to randomly fall asleep in front of him. I spent the rest of the day sending text messages trying to explain to him that I suffer from narcolepsy. FML
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Top comments
lucky0514 0
WTF is wrong with you people... "texting" for four days and you wanna have sex with her? YDIYDIYDI
Neferria 0
Wait, why did she want to come to your place for a nap?
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Comments (173)
notlovingit 0
THANK YOU exactly my point!!!
junjouromantica 0
take a nap 4 up, 1 down To "hook up"; to "sleep with" someone. Intercourse. Originated in Dallas, TX after the millenium, but before that song "I'ma put you to bed" came out.
cheeseburgerplz 0
YDI for being a perv. Not everyone wants to have sex with you.
lovelymistake23 0
In what universe does "I want to take a nap" really mean "I want to have sex?" If I said "I want to watch a movie" that could be code for having sex...but I'm pretty straight forward and don't usually sugar coat things (RichYungReverse....not all girls always speak in code).
spoo 24
dang, I hope nobody hires OP as a babysitter
letitbe56 0
Boys, I know this idea might be really wild, but sometimes a girl really DOES want to nap, or watch a movie, or study, or whatever else you decided was code for sex. Heck, even if she said, "Let's make out" it doesn't mean you need to get out condoms. YDI for assuming.
TPandaManT 0
But guys just think they are SO good at assuming! Think is the operative word.
Tchernov9 0
Dude YDI for inviting a girl you texted for only 4 days and thought you would have sex with her right when you meet her, she might be a cheating AIDS diseased ridden *****!
Delilahlilah 0
Actually, from this post, the OP sounds more likely to be the one with AIDS. Op, YDI for being a stupid *****. Because you know someone for four days that mean they want to have sex with you? You're an idiot, and people like you annoy me.
krispykreem 0
You've been texting for four whole days?! And she just wanted to take a nap? Blasphemy! YDI...
jcooplsu11 0
BURN!!!
MyLifeIsOneBigFM_fml 0
All I can say is she's just not that into you.
halflife3isreal 0
Naps don't equal sex dumbass
somethingawesome 9
YDI for not knowing that she was serious.