Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought I was her ex-boyfriend. I'm a girl. FML
Today, I broke my little toe. It got stuck in my panties as I struggled to get a leg through. FML
Ninja skills
Today, my sister kicked me up the ass with such precision that I’m still bleeding from my asshole where the toe of her shoe tore the skin. FML
Toot toot
Today, I had my new boyfriend come over. Within five minutes of him arriving, I accidentally let one rip. Shocked, I quickly tried to explain it away with, "That was my shoe." I was barefoot. FML
Today, after walking in on my roommate, I found out that pleasuring yourself with a shoe is a thing. It wouldn't have been so bad if the shoe hadn't been mine. FML
Change it!
Today, I had sex with a friend. It was really good too! Until she kicked me in my right nut while changing positions. FML
A tale as old as time
Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML
Today, I gave my virginity to my boyfriend. All I got in return was rug burn and an infection. FML
Today, I was trying to wiggle my boxer shorts off to get it on with my girlfriend when my knee hooked on the elastic band. I was anxious to get started, so I used force and ended up kneeing my girlfriend in the crotch. FML
Rough
Today, I lost my virginity. We did it on the floor in my step-sister's room, and the entire time he kept pushing my head into the carpet. I lost my V-card but gained rug burn on my face that looks like a fatal disease. FML
Top comments
emerluvsu 6
That's the most original fml I've ever heard.
123zc1 3
Omg I almost died laughing
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Comments (571)
smartman136 8
Rule 34. If it exists there is **** of it. Ths is just another thing yet to be
DuckyMomo 2
My first comment was moderated for saying I didn't believe this could happen. Are we not allowed to have opinions? Isn't that what the comment board is for? I still don't believe it :P
Bobby64 29
^ Read the rules before you complain about getting modded. They say: Please don't post any comments which question the validity of an FML (accusing the original poster of submitting a fake story, or arguing that an anecdote is "not FML worthy" or "even "not an FML" based solely on your own personal intuition or opinion isn't very fair. Furthermore, it ruins the other users' reading experience).
CoffeeZ 0
No, you didn't. Attention *****. A shoe... Smdh.
icic6772 0
Shoe rape
Lexiebear27 10
Ouch!
hintza 10
haha, did it at least get you to the happy place?
josiahj 13
This made me cry I was laughing my ass off so hard...lmao
twisted54 1
I bet the shoe didn't even call you the next day. Soulless bastard...:)
Karma_apoc 8
That can't happen. A cherry is 4 inches up the ******.
afrost19 0
So your trying to tell everyone that the shoe went so deep in that it tore the muscle or your " cherry"? No idt so. Theres only one way for u to lose ur virginity
erin0 8
The hymen isn't a muscle. Just a thin mucus membrane. It's also not "deep" inside the ******, and it doesn't take much to break it. Get your female anatomy straight, please.