Today, I got hit in the mouth with a hockey stick and lost four teeth. Yesterday I got my braces of six years removed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, they finally took my braces off. 7 hours later I fell off my bike and chipped my tooth. FML
Today, I had eight teeth removed in preparation for getting my braces fitted. My winter break will now consists of barely being able to sleep or eat, tasting blood, and looking like a goofy-ass chipmunk. FML
Today, I went to see my orthodontist. He informed me that I have an underbite and I will probably need braces again. I just had them taken off last year, after five and a half years of oral hell. FML
Today, I got my braces off. I also got my tongue pierced. Both by my orthodontist. FML
Today, I got my braces put on. This is the second time I've had them. The first time was after my cousin opened a car door in my face. This time a jock punched me in the mouth for saying that Reese's taste the same as Snickers peanut butter. FML
Today, after a trip to the emergency room for severe stomach pain and almost passing out in the shower, I slipped on the wet bathroom floor and broke my two front teeth. FML
Brace yourself
Today, my orthodontist thought it would be a good idea to put braces on the teeth in the very back. One bracket popped off twice, after which he shoved a metal band in my mouth onto one of my teeth, cutting my gums, and causing gushing blood. Now, I can’t eat anything unless it’s baby food and I have a lisp. FML
Hangry dude
Today, I accidentally bit so hard on my fork that I cracked my tooth. FML
Great idea
Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML
Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML
Top comments
DocBastard 40
Congratulations! You just bought your orthodontist a Mercedes.
sorryinadvance 0
God said no.
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Comments (265)
JerryCedar 2
first!?
Bewitched_fml 0
Congrats! You get a cyber-cookie! Please pick it up in the near future.
stfuscrub420 0
good job! I care and I think youre a pretty cool guy.
Filitov 0
You presumed correctly, Kay. So they still are first... to be moderated, that is.
mfmylifesrsly 30
if anyone else wants to be moderated alls they gotta do is dance like it's 1969 and the free lovin' is still lovin' baby, ohhhhhh yeeeaaaahhhhhh!
DocBastard 40
I'll keep my fantasy to myself. All I'll say is that it involves an empty beer bottle, some vaseline, and a taser. I...should stop now.
Filitov 0
This group of comments is so much more hilarious if you saw the before AND after intervention for them.
wwerulez14 6
#56, who would dare hold an intervention? Kaysl would likely hold them down and tweak their nipples, while Doc would shove that empty beer bottle in a very sensitive spot. Let's not forget Doc also has that taser... Besides, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em!
cwhitney11 4
Doc, your doing it all wrong. tsk tsk don't use a taser, hook yourself up to your car's jumper cable and crank it up. now THATS how it's done..........no experiance of course.........at all.........none........;)
KiddNYC1O 22
******* ay, Kay. You're such a ******* potty mouth! =p
kaity111 0
I feel the urge to join this convorsation(: I haven't gotten many opportunities to be perverted lately. But the original post was moderated, causing me to be terribly sad :( anyone know what it said?
the_flirtt 0
FML is getting crazy hahaha
ayyeBG 0
it said **** yu boo boo get a fat clue always adchdchfxvhnn.
KiddNYC1O 22
86- "first"
lexi365 20
that is so wrong in so many levels
xGetScaredx 0
#92 why do people even say that??
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
I've been so wrong in so many lovers
KiddNYC1O 22
#103- they're newbs that need an undeserving sense of accomplishment.
KiddNYC1O 22
#103*
idkmyusername 0
oh, you guys are funnier than the FML :)
mfmylifesrsly 30
86 if you're talking about what I said I can't say it again because I got siren to moderate me, again, hehe I think I have a lesbian crush on her
KiddNYC1O 22
Don't flatter yourself, Paramore. She was talking about comment #1... I think. =P
xGetScaredx 0
#103 thank you :D that makes sense...:P
zp5 4
"need a moment? chew it over with a twix!" wait a minute...
mfmylifesrsly 30
lol well my original comment started the whole perverted talk so i was assuming it was :P
mamamiaaa_fml 12
6 years of braces? wow FYL. Look on the bright side it adds character. Make up an exciting story for each tooth lost.
xxxDeathBat7xxx 0
So much better then the FML. I as well was hit in the face..but with a fist, accidentally, and leading to my lip going through my braces..good times. :P
KingDingALing 9
You guys are rookies! I'll show you how a real man acts out his fantasy! I need a playboy magazine, 10 thermometers, tape, a bong, a copy of the Exorcist movie, a cross, and a stripper pole. Bring a lot of dollar bills!
Ryder42 0
wow... can I just watch???
Efeks 0
#124 Made me laugh. :)
As1LayDying 4
that's what you get for playin hockey dumbass!
CountryBoy1993 0
hey babe give me a call 9106247470 so we can talk ;)
xGetScaredx 0
#205 if that's actually your number, why the hell would you post it on a website/application for all to see? :/
kaity111 0
#126, a lesbian crush on me? If so, oh boy am I flattered(; I'm straight but I totally act gay sometimes so I think that the pervertedness should continue(:
kaity111 0
Oh and #205, are you even saying hey babe to a particular person, or just in general? Lol! You're brave to put your number up, so I don't have anything but nice things to say about you(: someone asks me, "Kaity, do you know countryboy1993?" My reply would have to be "hell yeah! hes that brave guy!" I know that was very random but ah well I hope someone was slightly amused by it(: the end.
kaity111 0
I posted this hours ago, but it DELETED! >:( #117, are you saying you have a lesbian crush on me? If so, thx, I take it as a nice complement(: and btw, u are super pretty! and #205, you are brave to put your number up on fml! Don't be surprised when a whole bunch of forty year old men who live in their parents basement still call you asking if you want to spray whipped cream on their nipples and lick it off. But I have nothing bad to say to you! If someone asked me "Kaity, do you know countryboy1993?" my response would have to be "Hell yeah! he's the brave guy with the whipped cream!" I know that was random, but I hope you were amused by it! the end.
deathcab7 0
216 would be correct...
kaity111 0
hahaha sorry thats what happens when u are secretly on ur fone during school(: read it waaaaay too fast
jordanbanana 0
ouch.
bmexoxo98 0
yess. agreed !
persianjr1 7
dont smile?!?!?
Cyosaric 0
Stop crying emo hore.
KiddNYC1O 22
What a confident booster!
KiddNYC1O 22
Wow, first time I can say I'm mad I'm not first! Way to go 1&2 gtfo. =]
IdkPIZZA 0
if I ever get braces again I think I would die :/ I'm just glad I only had em for two years. A lot of people I know had them for 5 or 6 years.
5t3ff1k4h 45
Confidence* booster?
KiddNYC1O 22
Yeah, I know, thanks.
wizzkidd99 0
should have worn a mouthguard. that's all there is to it.
Fa7_fml 0
if I ever get braces you can be sure that I wouldn't be involved in activities that would risk me getting my teeth knocked out as soon as the braces came off. So ya, he DOES deserve it. He wasn't smart enough.
Bewitched_fml 0
well know you look even more charming! :D
tman188 0
no one wears braces for 6 years
soul_fml 0
Well, some people do. at that point, u would just have surgery, but whatever. ( on iPod, so Nazis away)
autumnnn14 0
My friend still has hers on, it's been seven years.
cadillacgal79 32
It depends on the person, mine were originally suppose to be on for 2 years but I got them off 6months early.
unidentified_sta 5
Flash those new pearlie-whites... While you still can
stfuscrub420 0
I think fml is a pretty cool guy. eh writes lame comments and doesnt afraid of anything.
InDenial 6
112, Who?
sorryinadvance 0
God said no.
Lindsaykae 0
hahahahahaha
tayamockingbird 0
Awwww. Poor thing. I'm sorry. Fyl
crksNcstls503 0
oh dang!! i got a pair of halloween vampire teeth you can borrow :)
iamhaley 0
would you want them back ? lol
DocBastard 40
Congratulations! You just bought your orthodontist a Mercedes.
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
silly doc. What would he do with ANOTHER Mercedes?
fakeaccountX 6
Give it to his kid when he's 16
wwerulez14 6
No, odds are he'll keep it for himself, crash it in a drunk stupor, and then buy another one after OP loses all of their implants in a golfing accident. This happens all the time...
QuixoticMcGee 0
It honestly doesn't get much worse than that. Jeeze. :(