Today, I got a call from a girl I dated long ago, who cheated on me and got pregnant by another guy, or so we thought. Turns out it isn't his, and she is taking me to court for child support. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML
Today, I found my daughter on Facebook after years of looking for her after the divorce. It turns out it was my ex pretending to be my daughter so she could track me down. FML
Today, my best friend told me she was pregnant over the phone. While in the middle of telling her congrats, she told me it was with my boyfriend. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend for another girl. This other girl helped me break up with her so we could date. After it was all done, she promptly rejected me and in front of everyone, saying how much of a douche I was for leaving my girlfriend for another girl. FML
Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML
Today, my crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to mine. I'm getting married in a week. FML
Today, I discovered that my ex-girlfriend, who I dated for 6 years, is getting engaged to my friend. The very same "friend" who's been encouraging me to break up with her for the past year. FML
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce. She also confessed that she has been cheating on me with my best friend for 10 years. I appreciated the honesty, but was slightly upset considering we have only been married for 9 years. FML
Today, I bailed my soon to be ex-husband out of jail after he'd been arrested for soliciting. Soliciting an undercover cop. FML
Today, I found out the guy that my girlfriend introduced as her brother was actually her boyfriend. I also paid for him to come out with us to the movies several times. FML
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Top comments
AngelLovesDerby 10
Whoa... What a Bi*ch... Get a DNA test homie!!
Vagitarian1 10
Paternity test. Now!!!
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Comments (164)
FemskyD 26
Beg its not yours!! Damn she sounds awefull!!
ProtoPrime 7
This is an episode for Maury bro
xnyletak 17
If it's yours, you should fight for full custody. She's clearly too irresponsible and immoral to raise a child, anyway.
deceivedandlied 19
Time to go on Maury. Have fun.
LuluRichards 20
How can she take you to court with no solid evidence you're the father? Get a paternity test and lawyer ASAP!
adhdwizard 13
DNA test ASAP. For all you know, she's just looking for some money! Sorry Op!
karlcolt45 19
look at the bright side, your sperm swims better than the other guys. that's a small victory right there
thatguynow 13
Well get a DNA test done first to make sure, if it's not yours flip her the bird but if it is, be a father to the kid but an ass to the girl.
caitiebug1119 15
Even if it is yours, this still doesn't seem like you should owe anything. She's the one who left. She's the one who cheated and claimed someone else as the father. She wasn't thrown out on her butt, she packed up a bag and ran into another man's arms...and pants.
elcee1987 18
And that's why child support can really screw people over.
loganberrybat 11
Umm, I beg to differ. He had sex with her too. Just because she cheated does not excuse OP from his responsibilities as a father. If anything, instead of just assuming the other man was the father, this should've been checked first, thus avoiding OP's current situation.
ksks1234 33
If the child is yours, I hope you step up to the plate and do the right thing. I have to agree with everyone else, get a DNA test.
luckyone365 7
He owes her and her offspring nothing.
speckledots 29
Its not just her child. It takes two.
SuperMew 22
Just because he offered half of the DNA does not mean he (or the child) will feel that he is the father. I am adopted, if someone came up saying, "I am your dad!" I would be like, "I have a father." She also cheated. Just because the first guy did not work does not mean Op owes her anything.
geekchick88 17
102, I'm sure the courts would absolutely see it that way. "Oh, she slept with another man, so you don't have to pay to support this child you made." If it's his, he needs to take responsibility and support it. That's what the law says. If you're mature enough to lay down and have sex, you better be mature enough to deal with the consequences.