Today, I got a 95 on my term project. To congratulate me, my boyfriend said we're having sex tonight. I only get laid if I get good grades. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I jokingly told my mom that I was having sex with my Professor. Her response was, "As long as you're getting A's, honey!" FML
Today, my girlfriend got a great idea for her history class project... while we were having sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I'm the best lay of his life. I really wish I could say the same about him. FML
Today, my boyfriend jokingly said that if I didn't pass my exam, he wouldn't have sex with me for a month. I failed it, and now he thinks I did it on purpose. FML
Today, I decided to give my virginity to my boyfriend of four months, because I told him I loved him. Two minutes after he'd pulled out, he grabs his cell and mass texts "I FINALLY GOT LAID!". FML
Today, while at a grocery store, I told my mom I had some good news. She exclaimed, "You finally got a boyfriend?!" No mom, just an A on my math test. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me pretty. Not because he actually thinks I'm pretty, but because "Hey, how else is a guy supposed to get laid?" FML
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML
Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML
Today, my boyfriend has been grumpy for days, because his essay on society's fixation with performance, winning awards and getting good grades got a somewhat disappointing grade. FML
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Top comments
candy1 0
hahaha your boyfriend is awesome
Cokencsi 0
I would get straight a's if that was my reward.
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Comments (229)
artssfreak 0
this isn't an fml
UWBeautyQueen12 0
nice way to reinforce good behavior!
gurlucrazy 0
um... hello kickass motivation! not an FML
jorby11 0
I'm a 37 year old virgin
perdix 31
Mr. President, Because you gave us Social Security, rescued us from the Great Depression and crushed fascism in WWII, I will lend you my wife for an hour to rid you of such a national disgrace.
jonny2x4 0
At least it keeps you from looking like a cheap ****.
timk_fml 2
good motivation
insanium14 0
just b happy
hb4227 0
that's not true. he's a guy, guys are horny. you can get laid every night so long as you seduce him
Paradoodle 5
ok if you're not doing that great in grades, thats a great idea. because at first you might not do so well, meaning sex will be less often, and probably also meaning because it's less often it will be more enjoyable because you haven't had it in awhile. as you do better you'll get more booty. lol I like the idea.
Lee002 8
only on the Internet can the same person get an A on a term paper AND get laid and find a way to complain about it...OP fails