Today, I got a 95 on my term project. To congratulate me, my boyfriend said we're having sex tonight. I only get laid if I get good grades. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I jokingly told my mom that I was having sex with my Professor. Her response was, "As long as you're getting A's, honey!" FML
Today, my girlfriend got a great idea for her history class project... while we were having sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I'm the best lay of his life. I really wish I could say the same about him. FML
Today, my boyfriend jokingly said that if I didn't pass my exam, he wouldn't have sex with me for a month. I failed it, and now he thinks I did it on purpose. FML
Today, I decided to give my virginity to my boyfriend of four months, because I told him I loved him. Two minutes after he'd pulled out, he grabs his cell and mass texts "I FINALLY GOT LAID!". FML
Today, while at a grocery store, I told my mom I had some good news. She exclaimed, "You finally got a boyfriend?!" No mom, just an A on my math test. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me pretty. Not because he actually thinks I'm pretty, but because "Hey, how else is a guy supposed to get laid?" FML
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML
Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML
Today, my boyfriend has been grumpy for days, because his essay on society's fixation with performance, winning awards and getting good grades got a somewhat disappointing grade. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
candy1 0
hahaha your boyfriend is awesome
Cokencsi 0
I would get straight a's if that was my reward.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (229)
iltby 3
Seriously, why do people stay with assholes like this?
narnia14_fml 0
haha better keep your grades up =]
awwwiciah 7
haha i wish my boyfriend did that.. i'd keep my grades up!
dirtyrussian97 0
that's how it's gotta be
blueheron93 0
Sounds like it's time to hit the books :D I'd be getting straight A's!
Inuyasha1770 0
this seems backwards...
lsk91 3
nice motivation XD
dydee 0
I think that's super cute and he obviously has your priorities and interests in mind. if only more guys were like that.
twistedsamuelle 0
I don't know what you're complaining about- how is this even an FML? You have a caring boyfriend with priorities , good grades (and motivation to GET the good grades), and you're getting laid.
ThatsWild 0
U must b mentally screwed lol