Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time only to realise she squeals like a baby pig in the process. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML
Today, my girlfriend started making pig noises during sex. FML
Today, I made my new girlfriend orgasm for the first time. All she said after was "I drooled a little". FML
Today, I was the first guy ever to give my girlfriend an orgasm. I was also the first guy to make her poop at the same time. FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML
Today, I read an article with tips on how to give girls full-body orgasms and I decided to test a few on my girlfriend. Instead of having a mind-blowing orgasm, she started cackling and said I looked like a giraffe trying to bob for apples. FML
Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were riding on my motorcycle. While at a stop light, she started to make these weird noises. Turns out she was having an orgasm. I still can't give her one. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
Today, while playing a game, my girlfriend told a bunch of our friends that she's never had an orgasm. News to me. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
"Today, I satisfied my woman. FML" REALLY?
mintcar 10
At least you gave her an ****** OP.
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Comments (58)
hockeyrocks39 0
I agree.... and you should definitely be proud that you gave your girlfriend an orgasim. I don't see an FML except for your girlfriend, who had the misfortune of having sex with someone so superficial.
PSQ91 6
Quiek Quiek Quiek xD How's that even possible?
lmaoatall 6
alright Burt Reynolds, you didn't have to go all Deliverance on her ass... but good job getting her to squeal.
creedaddict 9
she came ... that's all that counts
resplendencerino_fml 3
shut the **** up op. you want sympathy because your gf can enjoy an uninhibited ******? bet the sounds and faces you make aren't so hot either. fhl for having such a selfish bf, who cares more about the sound of her ****** than the fact she was able to achieve one!
spazmattic 0
Aren't pigs supposed to have 30 minute orgasms? That rocks...
HomeAl0ne 20
Funny, she doesn't make those noises when she's with me. Try duct tape.
soulfulemo 0
oink oink, man. oink oink..
jared280zx 0
nice work Kermit, at least you got 'er to go.
hurley12 30
Well if you love her you'll learn to accept it. Don't make her insecure about something she can't help.