Today, while playing a game, my girlfriend told a bunch of our friends that she's never had an orgasm. News to me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my group of friends, my girlfriend, and I were playing "Never have I ever." My girlfriend's turn came up and she went with, "Never have I ever had an orgasm." FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML
Today, my girlfriend of over a year said she has been faking her orgasms since the first time we've had sex. FML
Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 11 months told me that she's been faking her orgasms the whole time. Just to make me "proud" of myself. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she started moaning and breathing heavily. I thought she was getting hot and was about to cum. Unfortunetly, she soon said, "I'm bored, let's play a board game." She was sighing, not moaning. FML
Today, while in bed with my game-obsessed girlfriend, she told me I was a "noob" in bed. FML
Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time only to realise she squeals like a baby pig in the process. FML
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Top comments
colton_colton 50
Tell your friends you've never had an ****** then
Enslaved 38
She said she never had an ******, not that she never had one just with "you". Some women have a difficult time having an ******. But they can still enjoy sex none the less. Did she lie to you and say she did or did you just assume that a moan here and there was her climaxing?
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Comments (88)
colton_colton 50
Tell your friends you've never had an ****** then
Thatissarcastic 17
A guy can't really say that since it's a lot more obvious when they do.
christopherwilli 14
That's not something you can easily bullshit.
tomvertigo 17
Nah, that'll do no good. She's bad at relationships if she fakes it, for the record. Be honest and help him learn what works for her.
cynthianicole95 9
Yesss. xD
lostinareverie 21
You've got a condom on and they don't look, it's pretty easy to fake.
batmanfredi 13
Guys can't do that because it's hard to get guys NOT to ******. And don't blame her because she hasn't orgasmed, it's harder for some women but blame her because she lied to you about it
funkypenguin 7
There is a difference between cumming and an ******. A guy can cum without having an ******. Skilled guys (not me) can also ****** without cumming.
OrangeSodaCrazy 10
bitch says what
higgysaurus 18
Are you calling OPs girlfriend a bitch....?
okokalright 15
Well she is. It's her own fault anyway. The most important thing in a relationship is communication. If you want to spice up your sex life with your partner, then talk to them about it. If you keep faking an ****** then you're just making yourself miserable
higgysaurus 18
#45 No I was actually asking if #2 was or not haha I couldn't tell from the lack of him saying "she's a bitch".
mds9986 24
Maybe it's a hint
yerawizardlizzy 27
A hint that she can't communicate in bed and has the gall to tell her friends about the result of her lack of communication in front of OP? Yep, sure is.
Econforthwin 15
That's a very lame way to find out too.
abagrov 14
Be like "yeah and you made me ?"
philosophicallll 25
Ouch. Tell her that orgasms are like opinions 'Once I've got mine, I don't care about yours'
AbtractAngela 17
that'll make it even worse for him, saying something like that in front everyone who will now not only think he's bad at sex, but selfish af too.
bobthenob 14
No idea why you're down voted. ... that's brilliant t and very true... finish up and go to sleep, happy days.
philosophicallll 25
@11 she seems pretty selfish herself if she's willing to drop her boyfriend like that, I don't see why OP can't make a joke at her expense.
withered 30
And then people like you (who are horrible at sex) bitch about getting none. It's like you'd open a restaurant, gave people shit on plates instead of a proper meal and then bitch that your business didn't work out.
Kieranr10 23
Maybe ur just to bad
ThatOneCommenter 5
Are we talking about her or your spelling?
Kieranr10 23
Too shay
whatwhatwhaaat 10
That sucks for you OP. It's stupid that she didn't even tell you first. Talk to her about communicating what she likes.
pandasauresrex 13
try handcuffs and whip ;) I'm kidding.... try communicating more and ask her what she wants.
Bibblejomin 18
THEN break out the cuffs n' whip.
ImTheAlpha 30
As long as you've done your proper research on proper use of a whip and cuffs and have discussed the scene beforehand.
KattzAttackz 2
depending on how the situation happened, seems to me like she's just being an ass cause the relationship has problems.. #takesonetoknowone if someone really cared for you, even if ****** thing were true, they wouldn't throw you on blast like that unless the care they once felt is now gone.
laden_swallow09 35
Twitter and Facebook, FML ain't.