Today, I gave a campus tour to a group of high school seniors. As I was showing off the dorms, one student asked, "Are these beds sturdy enough for threesomes?" Before I could respond, another kid shouted, "How would he know, I bet the only action he gets in bed is from his left hand." She's correct. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while cleaning the hostel, I had to make some beds in a dorm room. There were three guys in the room, one of whom was sitting on a bed. He looked me straight in the eye and I gave him a big smile before I realized he was jerking off. FML
Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate having sex in my bed, because apparently hers is "for sleeping only". FML
Today, after getting into bed, I found a used condom under my covers. I asked my roommate about it. She freely admitted that since my bed was comfier than hers, she had sex with her boyfriend on it. FML
Today, my parents were helping me construct my bed. We ended up not having enough screws to properly secure the frame. My dad mentioned that it might cause problems if I got a girl into my bed. My mom said, "Don't worry about it, we all know that's not going to happen." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex in a rarely used room at school. We got carried away and found ourselves locked in. We slept there overnight. We woke up when the cleaning lady found us the next morning and were greeted by worried parents and school staff. FML
Today, I met the guy who will be my dorm roommate for the fall semester. One of the first things he said was, "By the way, I'm into self-massage, so don't get weirded out if you hear noises coming from my room a lot." Great. FML
Today, I went to bed with three hot, half-naked girls beneath me. I was in the bunk above. Alone. FML
Today, I was discussing sex with my guy friends in their dorm when I asked one of them what he would do if I got naked and crawled into his bed. He replied, "Nothing. You're one of the guys now." They all agreed. FML
Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML
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Top comments
bipolarchipmunk 0
you should have said "**** you bitch, I'm right handed!"
ohhboyy 0
slap him in the face with ur left hand see how he likes it
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Comments (146)
casica 0
bahhahhahahahahahaahahahahhhahaha i bet you can't wait for those kids to go to your school next year!
ElzhiPreface 0
lol, if they doubt the beds sturdiness for threesomes, I doubt the bed will be strong enough. Either way, it's funny stuff here :D
dcfcfreak 0
you should have been like, "wanna find out?"
dcfcfreak 0
When they wanted to know if the beds were sturdy enough you should have been like, "yall wanna find out?"
snic 0
yikes .. that definitely sucks.
Will09 0
as soon as she would say that id be like," im a righty u ****!!!"
digitalangel 0
And here I thought guys did that in the shower, because of the mess.
Chaith 16
I am right handed, but I need that hand for the mouse. New wave of all lefty teens that grew up on internet ****, REPRESENT. FML
Nice_but_Unlucky 0
hell yes thats me
ijustreadem 0
win
latuka 0
lol #18. i didn't even think about it that hard. but i guess you have a point there. that sucks ballz man. i wouldn't have had the ballz to say something that rude to someone. i guess my parents raised me right.
nomadxx7 0
Love #14 comment "Hmmm, I don't know. How about you and you (two of the hottest seniors) come up to my dorm to test out the bed."