Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my lover and boyfriend of over 5 years has me listed in his contacts as "Vagina". FML
Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he may have an STD. When I asked who he was with before me, and where it might have come from, he listed off almost every single one of my friends. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me by testing myself for STIs/STDs and got a positive result for chlamydia. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, he asked which girl I'd found out about. FML
Today, I found out that the reason why my boyfriend has a chipped tooth is because his teeth hit another girl's teeth while kissing her. FML
Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML
Today, I found out I have a huge infected boil on my vagina. The worst part was that I wasn't the one to discover this. My boyfriend was. FML
Today, my boyfriend's jaw was swollen due to him not taking care of a cracked tooth. He's convinced it was actually caused by an STD, and accused me of giving it to him. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that I don't have a "grippy vagina" after he slipped out for the third time. FML
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Top comments
KingOfOreos 0
he doesn't want to be bit durr lol
creamcheese724 0
****** dentata
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Comments (425)
slinkydee 2
he must be disturbed and scarred for life from that movie Teeth, where some chick has teeth in her box and it bites guys dicks off.
twinkletoes747 16
at least he's not looking for pussy trolls
construction 7
better safe than sorry
TheMasticater 9
Smart man. He's a keeper!
XxIVIODZxX 6
Lol the movie TEEtH
luna4545 4
sounds like he's seen the movie teeth!
MarijuanaPanda 0
haven't you seen the movie teeth that shit ain't pretty
DalekScythe 0
maybe he wants to see if they have cavities.
Kfalkosgirl 2
Lmfao I wrote this FML and no I have not yet seen the movie but I will soon and I've heard of ****** teeth lol. But he told me about his 'pinky' trick four months after our first time having sex. We have sex usually everyday. Sometimes multiple times. I figured he would have said something sooner.
Kfalkosgirl 2
Oh and just so everyone is clear. I DO NOT HAVE ****** TEETH. And no he is not afraid to get a ******** either. In fact... well that's none of your damn business lol and he is straight and does not enjoy giving or receiving anal lmfao just clearing that up. But No I don't have ****** teeth.