Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I found out that my lover and boyfriend of over 5 years has me listed in his contacts as "Vagina". FML
Facebook of what?
Today, I saw in my browser history a profile from one of those "Facebook of sex" websites. Turns out that my boyfriend has been posting naked pictures of himself on there using my laptop and flirting with teenage girls. His excuse? "I have friends on there." FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML
Bloggers gonna blog
Today, I found out my boyfriend has an online blog that he updates every time we have sex. It’s ridiculously detailed, right down to the slight difference in the pink of my vagina and the slightly darker pink of my asshole. He's a dead man when he gets home from work. FML
Snoopy
Today, I thought it would be funny to go on my boyfriend's Facebook to change his status. While in the process, his account received a message. Turns out he's planning on hooking up with his ex-girlfriend/one of my friends and is definitely over me. How's that for snooping around? FML
Recognize this?
Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML
Today, my boyfriend poked me on Facebook. I got excited because this is as close as he's come to touching me in weeks. FML
Repetition
Today, I introduced this website to my boyfriend. We laughed at a guy who screamed his sister's name during sex. Guess what he thought would be funny to do when I was seconds from coming? FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend uses a period tracker app to find out when we can fuck. FML
Secret garden
Today, I found out my boyfriend has an account on a sex hookup site. He said it has "interesting articles" and that he'd completed his profile and listed his sexual preferences out of boredom. When I told him to sign in and prove he hadn't been messaging girls, he refused and called me paranoid. FML
Top comments
rbubbles 20
Quite a funny boyfriend you have there
CrAzYyEt 8
Haha has he poked it yet?
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Comments (379)
rbubbles 20
Quite a funny boyfriend you have there
whybother8 0
Thats embarrassing and funny that u allow that..
tona01 16
well it sounds like there is something you can do, and i know that i'm a guy, and it hurts me to say it, specially to another dude, but you have to stop having sex with him until he stops, and also consider the posibility of breakin up with him, if does those types of jokes a lot. He is disrispecting you and your privacy....still can't believe my ex left me for a douche like that
SirObvious 1
is it a public place?
KaintukeeBob 13
Yes, very funny boyfriend...who most likely won't be checking in for a while.
BigJay13 0
#46 don't take the anger from when your Ed left you for a douche on this guy and his good joke!
BraBrando 0
46, Don't you know? Girls don't want gentlemen anymore. But seriously, this can be taken as a joke if acceptable by both parties. From OP's perspective I think she may have found it funny the first time.
BigJay13 0
Ex not Ed lol
CattyPurry 0
you should make your own little "place" for his dick and notify everyone that you won't be checking in anytime soon. :)
lindseyluvszac 4
If by funny you mean in the head..
tona01 16
both of you are right 64-65 shouldn't hate on him because of another person and yes i really don't understand why girls don't want gentlemen anymore, could a girl please explain why?
enonymous 9
My anus is liked on yelp.
sarabraun8 7
hahaha I want your boyfriend.
lalalaleah123 0
Well I DO like a gentleman..so I can't help you
xSummerRosaleex 1
I like gentlemen as well. :P
suprmidgt 0
91 - I think it is more that the assholes have something else that girls are attracted to. From what I've seen and talked to older women that have been through it they say "it's more that they like the independent, goes to his own drum and looks to be able to take care of/protect them. That type just comes with an asshole most of the time." and there are women that like gentlemen just not the ones your looking at. Fix your hair might be a start.
VeroAnne 11
Lmao, thats funny as hell, I wouldn't mind .
WellThatSucksMaj 0
Well if you were to get pregnant at least he would know for sure it's his kid since he keeps track records hahah
AngryNinja 1
Have one of your guy friends check in. That'll teach him. (; I'd find it amusing if my boyfriend did this. I don't see how he's an asshole. He having some fun. Maybe OP should have whatever is up her butt check out..
theunknowned 1
is he the only one checking in?
CompettiveCheer 0
If I was OP I would check into,"Teenie weenie."
little545 0
u can have me I would do that
rileybrownie 0
well I would want a gentlemen but also somebody who knows how to makes me laugh and well that's funny so we don't know the guy if he is a gentlemen or not but he has a sense of humor...
theaws0m3guy 4
Lol sounds like that one Collegehumor skit. Anyone know what I'm talking about?!
Eaglestrike117 29
Awesome.
idontcare8l 3
At least he doesnt have another facebook place , " OP's mouth"
MaCOOLiT 5
whats ur bf's facebook page? id like to know where he checked in so i can check in as well LOL
jisaac09 25
Of course 124 and 129 would both like gentlemen. If you poll 100 girls 90+ would say they want a gentleman but in life they would care less about if he carried her books/ groceries or opened the door for her than they would if he was a interesting guy or if he takes care of her.
Friaza 29
Sounds like something my sister's boyfriend would do.
melliemoo17 6
Me too. Wish I could find one. Smh.
Gimme20Dollars 1
That and they have a tendency to be more likely to tell them everything that they want to hear, just to get them where they want them. Then they end up keeping them after they've bedded them (something like 60% of hookups end up becoming relationships). Now they're dating this asshole, and they think he is great because he's lied to them about who he really is. Then they're shocked when he cheats on them. Now they're shocked when he ends up beating them. Now they're shocked when he ends up having absolutely no respect for her as a person.
terranada 3
That works cause he's a dick.
joeyc97 0
Gahahahahahah
MrsDruidess 23
@91, nice guys take the time to pick a girl, assholes hit on almost anything so in numbers they win out. And like others have said, they lie, good guys don't, well not big lies like assholes. Yes we want good guys, I married my good guy! I also make sure my female family members that are younger see how a man is supposed to treat a woman, and how a woman is supposed to treat a man (goes both ways) and to all of you saying how funny it is or OP should lighten up, its social media, meaning everyone can see. Your friends and family members don't want to know when you're having sex! You really want your grandma seeing that? Its called privacy. I know that the younger generation is completely unaware of what privacy is and its importance because their whole life is shared on one page or another, but trust me, something's are better left unsaid and unshared. Also it truly is a matter of respect, how is it any different than a guy running around telling everyone he slept with her? She should and would be pissed, boyfriend or not. You just don't share that kind of stuff with everyone, its disrespectful to her and their relationship.
FlashBurn 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Well isn't it thoughtful of him to do that? Now you can have a track record for having sex with him! Just tell him to yet rid of it or you'll hold out on him, duh.
frozentreats 0
You probably spend all day having wet dreams about your sister, and you'll obviously never have sex in your life, soooo you probably shouldn't be talkin pal.
thir13enthour 0
You can't tell a chic to hold out on the vag u retard?!?! I'm taking your Man Card! Grow some fn balls son.
crackerjacks119 0
I second that motion
FlashBurn 13
Hey 120, that the best you can do? Pathetic. Anyhow... It's D bags like you that give men a whorish reputation. Try having some decency and respect. It's only by choice that I don't because I have morales. As for you, 125... Take it, because you need it more than I do apparently. I don't need it since I already have a woman.
ppatty 0
how our comments got deleted?
bmar21 0
To bad you've never had sex buddy haha
creamcheese724 0
I had a sex buddy...it was glorious
ppatty 0
this bitch keeps deleting our comments just cuz he cant have sex lol. girls will try to have sex anytime they can
MRukkus 5
that didn't really make sense...
wannbaussiegurl 4
I'd just dump him and call it good
Justforlolz 14
I don't see the problem here.I
Fx13mz 7
I'm doing that from now on.
Rwcrazy 0
L
hoodasswhitekid 0
M
CanadianBlondee 0
N
fuckmrsoftee 0
Q, just to mess up the order
palatapus 0
R
tookietookie123 5
How many times have you been in one? 1/2 time?
nikesonmyfeet_fml 5
if you ever get any
rileybrownie 0
oh snap!! haha
cbaidchris 6
203 is your cypher complete? also look at that hair he's not getting ANY
TheGianaJinx 0
You are all making me crack up xD This is a good conversation. Keep it going x3
jackieejack 0
203- lmfao i was just about to say that
xSwaGKinGx 0
sorry 4 , but this only applies to people who get pussy
jordankeener 0
you prolly don't get any tho lmao
Stonedmanalex 0
All you guys seem like you get more **** then any pussys ever seen
testbug321 3
Plenty of opportunities that's for sure
evamusical 12
Be nice.
jobsman99 0
how many friends does your ****** have? how many people like it?
thomas357 0
hahahaha
Blue87 4
lmao
HomeAl0ne 20
Like
cptcook 0
winning!!!!
jordankeener 0
I like it
CrAzYyEt 8
Her ****** has more friends than she does.
ConnerCyanide 0
O shit... Lol
CrAzYyEt 8
Haha has he poked it yet?
imustbeinsane 2
she shouldve included a link, imagine all the pokes
Schnyduh 4
Lmfao
samanthanicolee 0
Haha yes he has
rileybrownie 0
well isn't that kinky
Karenzita23 5
Haha, that was a good one.
sjcluvslbm 0
Hahahaha
Mysanitywins 10
******* win. Nuff said.
Tomcat99_fml 3
I'm sooooooo checking in...
deathtrap 0
she should create a fb event " sex with the boyfriend" starts at 8 pm ends at 8:01 pm.
j2awesome 0
lol!
dreawlkr523 0
hahaha a group even from 8:00 to 8:06
that_is_Nathy 9
well, since it isn't me...that's funny XDXDXD It's great! But I can understand why it sucks for you so FYL but still - hahahahaha! =D
StopDropNRoll 11
^ that's how we all feel
IscoreOnU 19
Sorry but your comment screamed annoying.
regsworld11 2
I agree, 16! I could barely understand with the way she typed with all the "XDXDXD"!
a_nutritionist 10
speak for yourself 12.
dedrater_kool_u 0
someone needs to go back to chuck-e-cheeses..
a_nutritionist 10
ah yes of course the comment saying we dont all feel the same way got buried...because thats clearly not true despite it being factually accurate. you people define stupid, seriously.
regsworld11 2
That's so funny! I should have thought of it first! Checking in!(: