Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my lover and boyfriend of over 5 years has me listed in his contacts as "Vagina". FML
Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he may have an STD. When I asked who he was with before me, and where it might have come from, he listed off almost every single one of my friends. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me by testing myself for STIs/STDs and got a positive result for chlamydia. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, he asked which girl I'd found out about. FML
Today, I found out that the reason why my boyfriend has a chipped tooth is because his teeth hit another girl's teeth while kissing her. FML
Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML
Today, I found out I have a huge infected boil on my vagina. The worst part was that I wasn't the one to discover this. My boyfriend was. FML
Today, my boyfriend's jaw was swollen due to him not taking care of a cracked tooth. He's convinced it was actually caused by an STD, and accused me of giving it to him. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that I don't have a "grippy vagina" after he slipped out for the third time. FML
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Top comments
KingOfOreos 0
he doesn't want to be bit durr lol
creamcheese724 0
****** dentata
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Comments (425)
scs90 0
lol you just never be too careful these days
jessamy_brit 5
he may be planning to rape you... in the movie the teeth only come out when they try to rape you!
fyriwolf666 8
The movie Teeth -- traumatising our youth since 2007.
KnucklesDeep 5
Break up with him now. You're not going to overcome the indoctrination involved in making him believe such rather obvious bullshit and when people put an idea like this into the head of their children, it isn't the only myth they convince their offspring is true, so you should avoid future pain and end it now.
GotALife 11
He's making sure that his dick won't get bitten of when he's going in.
perdix 31
I'd walk a mile for a vertical smile. I wonder if he went down there armed with floss.
jbabe96 0
very strange
Kenneth14 0
just because it has lips it that doesnt mean that it has teeth
valdancer99 0
****** police.
Senior29 8
must have watched the movie teeth