Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I lost my virginity. It took all of 30 seconds. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity. In my boyfriend's racecar bed. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML
Today, I lost my virginity in a porta-potty. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams, unfortunately she called me by my ex-bestfriend's name. FML
Today, I gave my virginity to my boyfriend. All I got in return was rug burn and an infection. FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
Today, I realized that the guy I lost my virginity to only slept with me for a bet. He confessed and apologized. He truly looked like he regretted it, so I forgave him and we hooked up again. Turns out this was a bet too. The worst part? I would do it again, because I'm really that lonely. FML
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Top comments
sanuxo_ 22
That's just sad.
flufee2 27
That should have been a clear sign that it wasn't the right time to lose it...
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Comments (126)
TurquoiseJesus 15
some hookers have some level of standards.
dabomb0513 10
OP has to be ugly as all hell
Axel5238 29
My friend did the same thing. He's still never been a relationship, on a date or gotten a kiss. He still is clueless and immature when it comes to women. It's really sad.
siggy_mcsigx 22
The problem with society's obsession that men have to be sexually active to be masculine. Insecurity and lack of self worth are consequences of this mindset. Going further into it, women are called ***** if they let men "be manly" by sleeping with them. I hate society.
syed121417 22
They feel the need to be masculine because society undermines their feelings. Guys have emotions, too, they're just programmed not to show them as much and it's actually ****** up. Double standards go both ways, my friend.
PrimeStarscream 30
Hi Chris-chan!
Ajkrumen 18
Shit, that's just downright depressing.
laden_swallow09 35
What's wrong, FMLers? Sex isn't allowed to be used for stress relief? If you've ever even had sex before (and even if you haven't), you know that masturbation can only do so much for so long… if you're not prudish enough to ********** in the first place. If he has to use some extra persuasion to get with Sidewalk Sally, then it sounds to me like he has deeper issues, and could definitely use some relief. FYL, OP.
worldclassrager 41
Did it work
Zeusalmighty 2
It's not a big deal, everyone is a prostitute in one way or another, whether it's for money or not, most people just aren't honest or objective with themselves about the reasons they had sex. Most people aren't very good their first time either, don't sweat it.
Zebediabolical 45
Speak for yourself. My first time I was told I was amazing. Over and over and over. That's probably why she charged extra, now that I think about it.
top_dawg45 10
thats cool