Today, I climbed onto my boyfriend's lap and sexily told him "It's getting hot in here," and started unbuttoning my shirt. He said "Oh," pushed me off him, and went to turn the ceiling fan on. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Cool down
Today, my boyfriend picked me up during sex and set me on his shoulders, with his face buried in my pussy. I loved it until he took a step and put my face right in the path of the ceiling fan. FML
Today, I sat down on my bed completely naked in front of my husband and said, "Man, it's hot in here!" while spreading my legs. He just blew on my vagina, asked if that was better, and then walked away. FML
Booming
Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML
Today, things were getting hot with my boyfriend and I started to breathe heavy and moan. He then says to me, "Babe, can you calm down, we're having sex not running a marathon." FML
Sick burn
Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to see more of his passionate side. He pushed my head down towards his lap. FML
So sensual...
Today, things began to get hot and heavy between my boyfriend and me. Suddenly, in a deep, sexy voice, he whispered, "God help me for what I'm about to do." Thinking it was just an odd manner of dirty talk, I mumbled about liking it. He then farted very loudly. FML
Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML
The art of seduction
Today, I took a bath and dressed in a skimpy lingerie. I sat on the couch for an hour and a half before giving up and putting on my boyfriend's old t shirt. It was then that he decided to comment. On the t shirt I was wearing. FML
Top comments
devildog562 33
Guess the fan was the only thing blowing.
diving_fml 30
guess he wasn't properly warmed up :)
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Comments (65)
juststephhere 23
Awe that's kinda cute in like a weird way.. Be more direct next time!
KittyyCattyy 9
Was he mad at you? Because I'm pretty sure he knew what you were trying to do.
lexiieeex3 32
How do you figure that, oh wise one?
KittyyCattyy 9
He could have also just not been in the mood, instead of mad. No need for the sarcasm.
sweetbliss3 37
guess he wasn't as hot as you were. maybe try something that can't be taken so literal.
SeriousJoker72 18
Maybe he was a... Fan :D
EvilTurtle 35
The hell?
Crossing 17
I think 16 meant wasn't, an attempt at a pun.
nikmiester 7
The SeriousJoker strikes again!
mahughes 19
Gues he's not the vest at reading signals
brivielle 15
seriously what is going on here today?
schwaka 17
Welcome to the Internet lol.
allybae_aye 8
He seems like a well mannered guy to care about your discomfort towards being "hot."
weveallbeenthere 30
idiot.
LeBandit 20
you might want to sit him down and talk things through to him xD
Taurus_ChicKa 37
You should have added to the end of that statement, "...so take off all your clothes!"
coming back in the future 30
Thats just fantastic.