Today, I climbed onto my boyfriend's lap and sexily told him "It's getting hot in here," and started unbuttoning my shirt. He said "Oh," pushed me off him, and went to turn the ceiling fan on. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Cool down
Today, my boyfriend picked me up during sex and set me on his shoulders, with his face buried in my pussy. I loved it until he took a step and put my face right in the path of the ceiling fan. FML
Today, I sat down on my bed completely naked in front of my husband and said, "Man, it's hot in here!" while spreading my legs. He just blew on my vagina, asked if that was better, and then walked away. FML
Booming
Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML
Today, things were getting hot with my boyfriend and I started to breathe heavy and moan. He then says to me, "Babe, can you calm down, we're having sex not running a marathon." FML
Sick burn
Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to see more of his passionate side. He pushed my head down towards his lap. FML
So sensual...
Today, things began to get hot and heavy between my boyfriend and me. Suddenly, in a deep, sexy voice, he whispered, "God help me for what I'm about to do." Thinking it was just an odd manner of dirty talk, I mumbled about liking it. He then farted very loudly. FML
Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML
The art of seduction
Today, I took a bath and dressed in a skimpy lingerie. I sat on the couch for an hour and a half before giving up and putting on my boyfriend's old t shirt. It was then that he decided to comment. On the t shirt I was wearing. FML
Top comments
devildog562 33
Guess the fan was the only thing blowing.
diving_fml 30
guess he wasn't properly warmed up :)
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Comments (65)
edmunson 22
Sounds like childish arguing here. Guys don't take hints, can't tell what women want, BUT if so much as the wind "blows" we get excited...mad or not. Best comment yet was "be direct" and don't try suggestions...we "yes, ALL of us" need instruction... Not dumb, just dense.
Ki11erC 18
No we don't ALL need instructions at all.
missblove 17
Oh Lord, gotta love the oblivious!
skitzymew 19
I was hoping this would end up as him being beyond unserious and start singing "so take off all your clothes".
1947Chevy 17
His first name does not happen to be Bill does it or by any chance his last be ingval. (I think that how you spell it
Axel5238 29
A lot of women prefer subtle hints vs obvious. From my experience they don't want to feel they have to draw you a map. Either find someone that does draw you a map or step it up.
fader48080 10
he at least shows consideration
8born8 18
Perhaps, he knew exactly what he was doing... You're taking off your shirt, saying it's getting hot, he puts on the fan because, he knows that it's only going to get hotter... when bodies start slapping and do the wild thing.
Ianamis 6
You know guys aren't always in the mood right? We do not want to **** 24/7.
Attacksloth 33
To everyone saying be direct: What she did was practically the most direct thing she could have done. Maybe he just wasn't in the mood. Gasp, it happens with guys.
TecheyTim 14
It would appear that you've trained him too well.