Today, I celebrated my four-year anniversary with my girlfriend. We didn't have sex and we didn't even kiss. All I got to do was cuddle the stuffed Minion she got me for Christmas. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our 5 year anniversary. All I got was him stopping by for a quickie before he went into work. FML
Today, it's been four months since I bought my girlfriend the vibrator she'd been wanting. She hasn't wanted sex since. FML
Today, it’s mine and my fiancée’s two year anniversary. No, not our engagement or dating anniversary, it’s the two year anniversary of when we last had sex. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me we've just been fuck buddies for the entire year we've been "together." This wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't working up the courage to propose to her on our anniversary. FML
Today, it's our third anniversary. After a candlelit dinner and a midnight boat ride, my wife turned down sex, because "it's too cliché." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our five-year anniversary. I got him a new flat-screen TV. He got me toilet seat cover. FML
Today, it's my 2-year wedding anniversary. It also marks 2 years since my wife told me, "We're married now we don't need to have sex anymore." FML
Today, it's my two year anniversary with my wife. She's celebrating the day with her new boyfriend. FML
Today, for my two-year anniversary I got my girlfriend a very expensive diamond necklace. She got me male enhancement pills. FML
Today, I took my "girlfriend" to a nice restaurant to celebrate our first month anniversary, only to find out she didn't even know we're dating, but only "friends who have sex sometimes." FML
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Top comments
Rich531 21
Sorry mate. Maybe have a talk with her? If you aren't satisfied with your relationship she needs to know.
leogachi 15
@3 If she didn't want to she's not obligated to just because it's their anniversary. We don't know if her not wanting anything physical is a regular thing or if she just happened to not want anything on their anniversary.
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Comments (73)
lvg_fml 10
Did you try to plan something. Did you try to kiss her? Communication is the key to every relationship
Mylehz 13
Minions are mini demons
xx000o 27
All of the above, ask yourself if you want the same for your fifth anniversary.
Steve7910 6
Leave her and find someone that is more in tune with you. The minion was a cool gift though.
kalbrek009 20
At least you didn't just celebrate your 6 yr anniversary (last week of October), then get divorce papers the day after thanksgiving (November) & get kicked out of your own house leaving you homeless because medication caused her to hallucinate that you were a bad person. FML
dracolich 27
If you only value your relationship for the amount of sex YDI.
littlefoott69 14
sounds like your married
Bragi 12
I'll bet she hasn't introduced you to her friends, either. You are not the boyfriend, OP.
johnnyswallop 18
Sorry, dude, but you sound like a "sensitive, intelligent guy." I found out years ago that chicks only pay lip service to wanting such a man.
Malsain_fml 10
Am I the only one understanding they did not had sex nor kissed THAT day? Everybody seems to be considering that nothing happened in 4 years...