Today, I called my wife from work to check in on her because she's eight months pregnant. She didn't answer. Instead she showed up at my work hysterically crying and screaming, "You don't love me because I'm a fat whale!" She then knocked everything off my desk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband wants me to apologize for getting angry when his father told me I'm getting so fat that I look like a whale. I'm not fat, I'm just 8 months pregnant. FML
Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML
Today, my pregnant wife paged my emergency line at work. Thinking she was in serious danger, I raced home and found her hysterically crying. When I asked her what was going on, she replied, "The dogs won't stop barking!" FML
Today, my wife caught me crying over her miscarriage and she started yelling and screaming at me to "man up" because she should be the sad one, not me. FML
Today, my wife called me at work, screaming in rage that she hated me, that I was a useless lump, that she wishes we'd never met. Did I have an affair or burn the house down? Nope. I set up the kids' backpacks for school today and forgot a library book that was due today. FML
Today, my mother came into my workplace to wail on me for "ruining our family's reputation" because I got a girl pregnant. I've been married to the "girl" for 8 years. FML
Today, I ignored my wife's phone calls at work, since all she ever wants to do is complain or talk about chores and projects. An hour later, security called my desk. She'd shown up at work to bitch me out for ignoring her. Now I'm the laughing stock of my workplace. FML
Today, my boss came storming towards me, screaming just how tired she is with my constant bullshit. Already pissed off, I retorted that she's a bitch and should go lose some pounds. Turns out she was talking to her husband on her Bluetooth headset. FML
Today, my ex called, saying she's 3 months pregnant. She seems to have forgotten that we haven't been in the same room, much less friends, in over a year. My dimwitted wife thinks the baby is mine. FML
Today, I attended my husband's holiday brunch at a company I also used to work for. I was excited to see former coworkers until one raced up, grabbed my belly, and in front of a crowded room, exclaimed, "You're pregnant!" Nope, just older and a bit fatter. FML
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Top comments
beckyxD 13
Just wait until she starts giving birth. She'll be screaming "I hate you! Why did you do this to Me you bastard!" haha. Don't worry. They're just empty threats (:
synonymous 1
Just one more month to go!
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Comments (208)
fairies633 8
There was no reason for her to show up at his work yelling and screaming and knocking things off of his desk, she could yell and knock things over at home.
chels1994 11
Such a funny mental image (:
americananarchy 3
Sounds like a bitch
coried91 28
So do you.
blondbirdy 1
Pregnant women are emotional, deal with it!!!!
jagrmeister721 2
Chicks voted YDI because they are lifelong victims who empathize with other crazy chicks.
Nitrogenica 6
Chicks vote FYL and then see your comment and think "huh. **** men." People like you make women hate men. Just saying
Rxoxdx 0
Ur fault for knocking her up
courtneyann211 10
I don't know where you girls are coming from saying she has a right due to her hormones! It was inappropriate for her to go to his work place a cause a scene! Yes, I do know what the hormones are like, but doubled. I've called or texted my husband while upset and said something similar but apologized right away since I knew my hormones were going crazy. But to those of you who think it was ok for OP's wife to do that, grow up!
lostfaithinpppl 19
Thank you! At least someone has some sense. I don't think it was in any way acceptable for the OP's wife to do that, hormones or not. OP's boss has a full right to fire him for the scene his wife caused and for her violent outburst. And before people start telling me I don't know what I'm talking about, I am a female who has been pregnant and has given birth. You can't do anything about the hormonal roller coaster, that's true. But you can, sure as hell, exercise self control and not act like a crazy person. At least in your husband's place of work, that's for sure. I wonder how OP's wife will like her life on unemployment with a new baby if OP loses his job now because of her behavior.
courtneyann211 10
And that's my point! So many women think its acceptable to act in an unruly manner just because they're pregnant! I used to think it was ok for them to act that way since I had never been pregnant. Now I am and it's doubled (carrying twins!!!!) but i would never, EVER, go to my husbands work to do that. I really hope OP doesn't get fired for his wife's actions.
lostfaithinpppl 19
Twins might be harder than a single baby at first but they are so worth it! Trust me :) Good luck with your babies! You will enjoy them so much! :)
courtneyann211 10
Oh I'm looking forward to them! But the hormones are completely different than with just one. (second pregnancy, first didn't make it) Levels are even higher and blah!!! Oh well. :)
MissHayleyJames 7
I don't think anyone's saying its ok to go cause a scene at his work because that's not, but acting like that at home would be. Home is the safe place where you can do stuff like that and have it be ok. You can't control the hormones or some of the actions, but getting in the car to go do that you can.
sulitak 27
I missed the at work part before I commented... not sure how but hey... I'm also carrying twins lol (though by the date of your comment I'm sure you've already had yours. congrats) Yeah... I try to even avoid crazy phone calls when he's at work. That's half our income.
williamcarter93 13
Sure, she was hormonal...but it's still (to me) unacceptable (or at least maddening) to go hormonal IN HIS PLACE OF WORK. she could have waited until he got home. Hell, in her emotional state (whatever it was induced my hormones) she could have hurt herself driving(if she did)
Sarahcastic 7
I am currently 8 months pregnant as well (and have had my share of hormonal times) and I would NEVER do that kind of crazy shit at my husbands work. Even if for some reason I thought that stuff, it's definitely not appropriate to do that!
courtneyann211 10
Thank you!!! I was afraid I was the only pregnant women commenting who is actually sane!
CaroAurelia 12
I don't think my mother even acted like that while pregnant, and she's high-strung enough without hormones!
Anubis_81 21
How bout this, women are stupid, and if they didn't have c***s I'd be throwing rocks at them.