Today, I bust my lip when a car bumped into mine. As I headed home, I was stopped by the police who told me my back light was out. I tried to explain, but it just came out as "fghjiljh" because of my lip. I was arrested on suspicion of drinking and driving. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML
Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML
Today, I got into an accident and my car was totaled. My friends then took me out to a bar for a drink to make me feel better. It appears that the police officer I'd spoken to had kept my I.D. by mistake and I couldn't get into the bar. FML
Today, I hit someone’s car and got arrested for a DUI. I had to tell my parents so they could remove me from the insurance. My mom's response in the background after I told my dad was "I knew it." FML
Today, I went to the emergency room for busting my lip open, I had to lie and tell them I slipped and fell. In reality I was singing with the soap bottle and slammed it into my lip. FML
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Today, it was my first driving lesson. I was so bad, the police stopped me and accused me of being drunk, because I almost crashed into the pole in front of them. FML
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML
Today, while parked at school, someone broke into my car by smashing the window. I called the police and they informed me I could drive it to the local station as it was an easy 2 minute drive. As I was driving there, I got pulled over for driving with a smashed window. FML
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Top comments
Jankae 0
LOLL, wait but I don't get how you can't talk properly just cause your lip is swollen a bit
_Noon_ 0
That sucks. But a test would immediately prove you didn't drink, so it's not that bad?
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Comments (96)
didi666_fml 0
One of my buddy exploded his bottom lip face planting the ground on a bike fall....he got 10 stitches but was clear as hell when he asked me to call the paramedics....YOU ARE FULL OF SHI-
Polygon 0
fake. they give you an actual test first to see if you are drunk. stupid.
kitcat1998 0
wow
InXTransition 1
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!
JadeyVengeance 0
Fake. They give you sobriety tests before arresting you. And you can talk properly with a busted lip.
Sixpakastan 0
WRONG. Only if you failed your FST or a strong smell.
WONDERWB 2
by law now they have to use breathalizers because of disabilites and other problems such as wheelchairs that prevent the walk the line method. either way they still have to at least smell the alcohol for it to be suspicion.
blgjohnnyy 0
okay either this is a fake or cause this guys lips were swollen they couldnt open their mouth so she "was refusing the breathalyzer test" in the cops' eye so therefore they would be able to arrest this guy
tacojauns 45
wow I'm the first one to comment on this FML in 4 even with replys
AverageJoey 18
Honestly who the hell thinks OP deserves this