Today, I bust my lip when a car bumped into mine. As I headed home, I was stopped by the police who told me my back light was out. I tried to explain, but it just came out as "fghjiljh" because of my lip. I was arrested on suspicion of drinking and driving. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML
Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML
Today, I got into an accident and my car was totaled. My friends then took me out to a bar for a drink to make me feel better. It appears that the police officer I'd spoken to had kept my I.D. by mistake and I couldn't get into the bar. FML
Today, I hit someone’s car and got arrested for a DUI. I had to tell my parents so they could remove me from the insurance. My mom's response in the background after I told my dad was "I knew it." FML
Today, I went to the emergency room for busting my lip open, I had to lie and tell them I slipped and fell. In reality I was singing with the soap bottle and slammed it into my lip. FML
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Today, it was my first driving lesson. I was so bad, the police stopped me and accused me of being drunk, because I almost crashed into the pole in front of them. FML
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML
Today, while parked at school, someone broke into my car by smashing the window. I called the police and they informed me I could drive it to the local station as it was an easy 2 minute drive. As I was driving there, I got pulled over for driving with a smashed window. FML
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Top comments
Jankae 0
LOLL, wait but I don't get how you can't talk properly just cause your lip is swollen a bit
_Noon_ 0
That sucks. But a test would immediately prove you didn't drink, so it's not that bad?
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Comments (96)
whitey_fml 0
FALSE. your lip would be obviously swollen and/or bruised if you really bumped it because a car hit you. pigs aren't smart, but they arent real dumb, either.
heavenandhell 0
wtf who allowed this FML to be seen by the general public this is a waste of time to everyone.
tpt09 0
You're a huge waste of time you fail buddy! XD
Soxfan19 0
I know everyone is crying wolf for the drunk driving part, but what about the LEAVING THE SCENE OF A CRIME!!!! You were in an accident that damaged your car, why the hell would you leave and not get an accident report?? YDI for being a dumbass!
holly_fly 34
Who said they didn't? The officer that responded would still have to go back to the station, process it, and file it. The other officers might not find out for at least a couple of days... And even then, they have no idea you were in an accident when they scan your plates.
triplethreat13 0
from the UK or not, you can't arrest someone without a good reason. the cop would have given them a breathalyzer test. FAKE!!!
intotheblue 0
Have you people never watched COPS? I've seen them arrest people for drunk driving plenty of times without using a breathalizer. They just make them walk a line, hold their foot in the air, all this dumb shit, and if the person can't do it right (some of it I couldn't do right SOBER) they arrest them. Especially if they're trying to meet quota at the end of the month (not sure if they have that in the UK but you get the point). OP - in the US, we have to talk to the other driver when we get in an accident, exchange information for insurance purposes and all that. It sounds like you didn't do that... I've bitten my lip so bad I can't talk properly. I mean I could but it hurt like all hell. I can definitely understand how having a bust lip would make you talk weird. But hopefully they'd see the lip injury, see damage to your car, give you a breath test, and clear the arrest.
jbizzle2688 6
Exactly
Phoenix_fml 13
bullshit. I've never known someone to not be able to speak because their lip was swollen. And the officer could probably see that.
yeahitstella 0
This reminded me of the movie Fun with Dick and Jane, where she had a swollen lip due to a side effect from the cosmetic she was tested on... hehe;)
jeane123 6
ohh that sucks im srry dude :]
Amphysvena 11
true, but it does take a lot for your lip to swell to the point that you can't speak.
sjks 0
YDI for drinking and driving