Today, I bought my niece a plush My Little Pony figure for her birthday. Only after she unwrapped it did I realize that it was meant to be a sex toy for grown men. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 8 year-old niece gave me back a Fluttershy plush I gifted her 4 years ago. When I told her it was a gift from the heart, she insisted on exchanging it for something of equal value. FML
Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML
Today, I took my daughter to a pony ride at the fair. I paid to have her picture taken, and when we got home, I emailed it to my mom. She replied, disgustedly pointing out that the pretty little pony was displaying a pretty little penis. FML
Today, I bought my niece a huge stuffed teddy bear for her birthday because I wanted to be the cool aunt/uncle. She hugged it, smiled, and then immediately hugged the gift bag instead, because apparently it made a "funny" crinkly noise. I have officially been defeated by packaging. FML
Today, I walked in on my teenage son passionately making out with one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML
Today, I realized the reason my 20-year-old daughter has been so moody and aggressive is because she missed the promotional My Little Pony toys at McDonald's. FML
Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML
Today, I finally bought the toy my two year-old son always wanted. He would always tap on the TV when the commercial for it would appear. I gave him the gift, and he started playing with the bag it came in. FML
Today, my mother-in-law thought it would be appropriate to give my five-year-old daughter some bedclothes with the Playboy logo all over them. FML
Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML
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Top comments
rhysfucker 24
C'mon...you didn't buy anything like that at We Be Toys. You know where you bought it; the sex shop. YDI.
mike7800 8
are we not concerned with the fact that these things exist in the first place?
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Comments (204)
daydreamer244 13
I'm just picturing the faces her parents must've made...
sexpectations 15
well if the toy had been given to their niece, I'm sure OP's brother/sister would have had a good laugh or at least understood the misconception
KingLewisII 34
Either that or he wouldn't be allowed to visit for awhile.
silvermoon5033 26
OP never said that he/she bought the toy new. He/she could have gotten it at a garage sale or second hand.
Mynamewontfi 40
The FML would be even worse if it's second hand when you think about it.
MissBehavin77 18
I hope it wasn't used, that's even worse. Gross
JazNim17 18
You know, when I read this FML, the first thing I thought was, "I hope he didn't buy it secondhand."
thief1434 23
And this, folks, is why you always read a product's description before purchasing! I feel like it'd be really to Miss the fact of it being a sex you if you realized that as soon as she opened it...
Rag_dollxx 21
How do you forget how to string a real sentence together half way through a comment?
Ki11erC 18
@26 It's the OP in disguise trying to make himself feel better by putting himself on both sides of the story.
icadragoon 11
They could have also checked the "users also bought this" under the toy (if purchased on Amazon). I'm sure KY jelly was in with that list (or something like that). YDI for sure.
Serenti 19
Maybe, just maybe he got it of the internet. He was looking for a MLP toy, found one and ordered it. I mean how often do you check the labels for lets say a teddy bear?
Rag_dollxx 21
If I was buying something from the internet I would look at a picture of the product before I purchased. If you can't tell from looking at it that it is an adult sex toy, then I don't see what the problem is.
famvd 15
Sometimes people put a fake picture of the product .. Maybe that's what happened.
Baucis 10
Well.....at least the dad will enjoy the present.
AnonymousAlpaca1 18
Let's hope the dad isn't into that sort of thing. He'd probably cut a hole in all of his daughter's pony toys.
Sandsh8rk 36
Pro tip - try to stay away from buying MLP stuff online without doing your research. Either way, buying an MLP toy from Wal-Mart or Toys'R'Us is probably your best bet for next time.
RedPillSucks 33
Your profile picture has the same expression as the parents of the girl when she opened her presents.
Sandsh8rk 36
I really need to buy a counter to keep track of how many times people have compared my profile pic to the FML or my comment.
Polynomial 28
Pokeachu, I choose you!
briang959 47
This will make a great family story one day.
scouttrooper8 12
What store did you shop at?
VitalDistance 14
Ummmm where did you but it exactly?
graceinsheepwear 34
let's hope no one butted it.