Today, I bought my niece a plush My Little Pony figure for her birthday. Only after she unwrapped it did I realize that it was meant to be a sex toy for grown men. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 8 year-old niece gave me back a Fluttershy plush I gifted her 4 years ago. When I told her it was a gift from the heart, she insisted on exchanging it for something of equal value. FML
Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML
Today, I took my daughter to a pony ride at the fair. I paid to have her picture taken, and when we got home, I emailed it to my mom. She replied, disgustedly pointing out that the pretty little pony was displaying a pretty little penis. FML
Today, I bought my niece a huge stuffed teddy bear for her birthday because I wanted to be the cool aunt/uncle. She hugged it, smiled, and then immediately hugged the gift bag instead, because apparently it made a "funny" crinkly noise. I have officially been defeated by packaging. FML
Today, I walked in on my teenage son passionately making out with one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML
Today, I realized the reason my 20-year-old daughter has been so moody and aggressive is because she missed the promotional My Little Pony toys at McDonald's. FML
Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML
Today, I finally bought the toy my two year-old son always wanted. He would always tap on the TV when the commercial for it would appear. I gave him the gift, and he started playing with the bag it came in. FML
Today, my mother-in-law thought it would be appropriate to give my five-year-old daughter some bedclothes with the Playboy logo all over them. FML
Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML
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Top comments
rhysfucker 24
C'mon...you didn't buy anything like that at We Be Toys. You know where you bought it; the sex shop. YDI.
mike7800 8
are we not concerned with the fact that these things exist in the first place?
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Comments (204)
DotDootyDot 17
I miss the days where MLP was a show for children and nostalgic adults, where you could buy toys without having that kind of issue.
ConstantlyAnna 8
Did you ask for it back so you could use it??
mattrd_fml 31
If you realized it after she unwrapped it, how did not know before you wrapped it? YDI
parism143 28
Maybe it was in a box and he just wrapped that.
KingLewisII 34
That could be what happened I doubt he wanted to play with it first.
beanthemouse 13
You should of looked at the toy properly before buying it. If you missed the probably obvious fact it was a sex toy by not looking at it, imagine if you got another toy and missed the fact it was partly broken and the child choked... Always look at the label, the description if it is online, the ages and look for the company name on the product, this is obviously not licensed hasbro. And never buy cheap knock off toys from flea markets or those little toy stands in malls, they contain lead paint and have not been safety tested. I think YDI, but I am still disgusted by my fellow bronies, isn't pony R34 enough? Do you really need a MLP sex toy? Honestly?
bobslawnservice 16
You are an adult male who sexualizes children's cartoons about colourful ponies. How about you grow up and stop being a weird creep? You obviously need some strong father figure to tell you to cut that sort of thing out. It is pathetic and creepy. Just stop.
KingLewisII 34
Hmm i wonder if #37 has written a fan fic recently.
peggscott 14
If she doesn't want it... Can I??
taylor21398 14
Well you obviously didn't buy it at toys r us....
littlem91 29
That or it was a whole different kind of "Toys" R Us...
B4rn3yST1NSON 15
Never understood the fixation over MLP , now I REALLY don't understand how it could go to an erotic level with those toys. but I guess that you saw it and immediately thought it would be a good gift rather than really caring about what to buy so YDI in a sense and FYL for the end result .
Fluosaurus 3
You certainly acquired it on eBay. These are just often better made than the one made in China, for cheaper than the official ones from Hasbro. I doubt your daughter would really mind about her pony being anatomically correct (just like some baby dolls and stuff) sure you will be grossed out but if it's a "she" it's actually normal. And no, i doubt she will become perverted or traumatized, but love her pony plushie for what it is, and love you for that gift, regardless. Other aspect : the psychological impact of this kind of toy, and how a character can have a gender, and a biological one. Today in most schools of E.U, there's Kinsley's Gender theory that is taught to children. They do support gender neutrality and exposes other theories that goes against all principles of biology and individual's identity, versus the actual acceptance of how we're born and how we're all made. Gender theory is something myself and a lot of psychologists are opposed to, because it's just wrong and will be more traumatizing kids than anything else, ever. I'm not advocating to draw every little pony with a vulva or a pair of balls either, and i doubt the person who created it being really a monstrous furry-zoophile. but it's not harmful either. Nudity and our biology is something we should not be afraid or ashamed about. it's our body and its integrity. Yes, human or ponies, we're all born male or female.
Mirorbo 27
What the **** did I just read
MissBehavin77 18
How does things like this happen? You can't buy something like that at a regular store and if you bought it online, there would have been a product description. You'd have to be rather clueless to not know. Btw, a mlp sex toy is disturbing.
Fluosaurus 3
I actually found a few like this on eBay a few month ago. ...yeah it could be but it's not like a vibro on their butt or anything. I only blame him for not paying attention and it's not the first time it happens. Is that really disgusting? Doubt so.
ChakatBlackstar 29
More disturbing then most of the other sex toys designed for solo play? There's no self-pleasuring toy, especially for guys, that isn't disturbing in some way.
perfect_flaw87 1
lie. you would have had to go to a sex shop to get a sex toy.
ChakatBlackstar 29
No. He just would've had to go on a site like Amazon or Ebay or any number of online stores, and some pictures and descriptions may not be clear, sometimes on purpose to get around any of the site's restrictions.