Anonymous
Israel
Today, I asked my lazy daughter to go make her bed. She responded by lighting our garbage bin on fire. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United States
Today, I found out my little sister is a pyromaniac. She set my bed on fire. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
United States
Twisted firestarter
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
lazy lazy lazy!
Weird logic
Today, I realized how lazy my daughter truly is when I saw her shivering under a thin blanket on top of her perfectly made bed. I asked why she didn’t just climb under her covers to sleep warm and comfortable. She said that this way she doesn’t have to make up her bed every morning. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, my young daughter came up to me, grabbed my face and said, "I'm putting you in the garbage." When I laughed and asked why, she looked me dead in the eye and said, "You are trash." FML
oh dear
France
Today, my daughter threw a can of hairspray into the fireplace because she saw someone do it on YouTube. FML
Anonymous
Tetchy
Today, I got home and my wife asked me why I hadn’t taken the bin out or cleaned the living room. I asked her why she hadn’t done it since she got fired 6 months ago for laziness and since then has sat on her ass watching daytime TV instead of job searching. She threw a mug at my face. FML
anonymous
France
Today, I put out a fire. Sadly, it was on my doorstep because someone had lit a bag of dog poop. FML
Anonymous
Madison, United States
Today, my pyromaniac sister somehow got her hands on my dad's lighter and set my bed sheets on fire. My dad said I must have provoked her, and that she can't be blamed for her mental condition. So now I'm grounded, and she has a new doll house to calm her down. FML
failure as a parent
Bound Brook, United States
Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML
baldspot
Australia
Today, my daughter decided to wake me up by putting the vacuum in my hair and turning it on. FML
Top comments
lozowen 10
Wow. Physco child!
JoeGrant 12
Your request got her fired up, it seems.
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Comments (122)
rogwest 23
Time to get a belt or switch an whip that ass!!
VancouverGuy89 9
Looks like some one is getting therapy for Christmas as a present
SystemofaBlink41 27
I was actually relieved at the end of this FML. I was afraid she was going to light her bed on fire... Garbage is still psychotically unfortunate, though...
asherm 15
Kids are so cute.... for other people to deal with
RedAlert0 7
my parents would kill me if I ever pulled something like that.
Izzicasey 18
I would whoop her butt for being lazy and then kick her out of the house for setting the trash can on fire.. Or I'd her make watch as I burned her bed, sheets and favorite items/things in the same trash can. And take away anything like an electronic (iPod, iPhone, iPad) and pass it to another family member to keep for good. That's very psychotic.. Ydi if you didn't punish her. Because I would never ever let that slide.
esigmond 2
**** no! I'd ship that bitch to military school in a second
polluxdc 10
YDI, shoulda never gone that far without disciplining the kid.
chris829 8
beat that ass...
Rodville 28
WHOOP! HER! ASS!