Today, I asked my boyfriend what he would do if I were to get pregnant. Expecting him to give me a cute and supportive answer, he replied, "We'd be finding you a nice flight of stairs to accidentally fall down." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He went outside for a "breather" and never came back. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I’m pregnant. He told me not to worry, he’d pay child support until it’s 18, and he’d be moved out of our flat by Friday. When I asked him why, he told me not to be stupid, no way was he being trapped into raising a kid. He didn’t even ask if it was a boy or girl. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend to let him know that I'm pregnant. He instantly replied "Bullshit!", then hung up and apparently skipped town. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He seemed excited, and said we should make the baby fat so he can bounce her on his lap and watch her double chin jiggle. Just to prove he's serious, he's been searching for high-calorie foods for babies. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I’m pregnant. He immediately had a massive panic attack about how a kid is going to ruin his life and split us up, because obviously I’ll choose the baby over him. We’re now in hospital because he hyperventilated, passed out and fractured his skull on the door handle. FML
Today, my pregnancy test came back positive. My boyfriend is no fan of fatherhood, so it was with some hesitation that I called him and let him know I'm pregnant. He replied, "Like hell you are!" and hung up. He now refuses to answer any of my calls. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he thought about having kids and, without a pause, he went, “Ew, no thanks.” I’m pretty sure I’m six weeks pregnant so, yeah… FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he might want kids one day, and he most definitely does not. In fact, he even thanked me for reminding him we need to stock up on condoms when we go shopping, plus he’s even considering a vasectomy just to make sure. I’m already pregnant. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
You are with a stupid man. The correct answer is: Falcon Punch.
spidersilkx9 0
that's what my dad said he'd do to me if I ever got prego.
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Comments (339)
DerFuhrer33 0
Boyfriend ftw! He was only joking with you, so I doubt this really is an FML. I'd probably give the same wise ass answer...but when push comes to shove I'd be behind her always. Don't worry OP.
ps3boi 0
u go to the same college as drew brees
ThatLooksSticky 16
When push comes to shove, you'll be behind her...at the top of the stairs? ;-)
thisguy22 33
lol thats the first thing I thought too...
DerFuhrer33 0
Haha I wasn't intending to make a pun but I see what you mean...and yes ;)
supaman1 0
103 mw2 fan I see. u got a ps3 or 360?
DerFuhrer33 0
360
Fireflies94 0
get ready to kiss his ass down the stairs thn,purposely
ThnkUComeAgain 0
WTF ur bf is an asshole
chokeabitch 0
you're not getting laid by any of the chicks posting these, can the act.
ZomgWeAreClubKid 0
Haha win! ^^
onmyown_91 0
both my boyfriend and my best friend told me that (I am pregnant) he's breaking up with me.
starile 20
FYL
argv 0
As he should. Stop breeding!
imright24 0
Anytime you ask a question looking for a particular answer, you're going to be dissappointed. YDI for fishing.
anorexicbarbie 8
YDI for asking that sort of question and expecting a cute answer. Unless both of you planned it, I doubt his answer would be "cute".
Hillbilly8888 0
lol, least he was being honest
HeatherXCore 0
My best friends boyfriend always offered a trip to the stair museum any time she asked :P
j4ym4n 2
and fall down the stairs you shall. you def deserve it if you are going to entrap him like that. bitch.
surt 0
exactly
TheKingDon 2
+1 to him. Much better than the coat hanger method.