Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I asked my boyfriend to ravish me. He told me he would rather play PS3. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were planning how to spend the day together. When I suggested we start off with some fun in bed, then get some pizza and play his favorite video game, he sighed, "Can't we just go straight to gaming?" FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend, who loves board games, to give me advice on a board game I'm making. I ended up crying in the fetal position. FML
Today, I propositioned my boyfriend of two years to have sex with me in the shower to spice up our love life. He said that he was really busy. He was playing Call of Duty. FML
Lore dump
Today, I made the mistake of showing an interest as my boyfriend was playing the new Assassin's Creed. Now I like that he enjoys gaming, but I was not expecting to be given a crash course in Assassin's Creed lore and history all the way back to the first game. It lasted ages. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to play dead so he could have sex with my "corpse." FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend had the choice of A) living alone gaming, or B) moving in with me, gaming in his own man-cave, lots of sex, and lots of pizza. He chose choice A. FML
Today, I gave my husband an ultimatum: either he could have sex with me or play Minecraft. Needless to say, he spent the rest of the evening playing Minecraft. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend to try and man up and act a bit tougher. He started crying. FML
Top comments
SakataGintoki 9
Why not both?
missababgaga 19
Here's a solution... give him both!
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Comments (158)
TheHarvest 7
man, decisions... decisions.. lol fyl
YoungMisfit 9
In sex, can you get a pet best? I didn't think so. But you can in Assassins Creed
hilda_kitty 16
I know eh? I'd probably break down crying too. I need a life.
YoungMisfit 9
Bear* not best
ClassyCommando 13
It's probably a better idea to choose the sex, because at least AC3 won't have had a goddamned mood swing and changed its mind the next night.
Forlorn420 9
There is no decision. AC3 wins duh
thisguyian 8
He probably knows "a night of sex" just means 3-5minutes anyways...
chell1894 13
That 3-5 minutes is entirely up to him though..
sens3sfailing 25
And the faster he finishes, the sooner he gets back to video games
ryry013 6
Think of the possibilities. What if OP and her boyfriend have sex every other day, and he just got Assassins Creed yesterday or today as part of black Friday. IMO, just give it a day or two. The game won't last forever, then he can be yours again i
FizzyApple 3
Seriously, if she just stuck her hand down his pants it wouldn't be such a difficult decision.
israelnotjacob 20
That's what you get for expecting him to make a choice that's just not fair.
teresa96706 29
Lol tell that to my boyfriend when I'm playing Assassin's Creed III.
teresa96706 29
**@FizzyApple
sens3sfailing 25
O.o your boyfriend is a lucky man. *forever available*
mexicanaweirdo17 3
At least he was considering you.. Not just chose the game
barleyguy 17
I'd pick sex in a second the new assassins creed sucks
Alihb 16
WAIT YOU CAN GET A PET BEAR?!?!
SakataGintoki 9
Why not both?
berichsoon 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
He's not mature enough for sex. Let him go play his little video game
JerryH 9
Gtfo 5
berichsoon 11
16 GFYS
sheethapins 13
Old El Paso hard and soft shell tacos.
Redoxx_fml 22
Show her his "hidden blade"
Enslaved 38
Because it's a trick question. Anyone that gives an ultimatum like that, is looking for a power trip to see if he'll choose her over a game (that she probably know has him at full attention). He's already dammed for not picking her right away. Poor little mouse enduring his wheel.
spekledworf 18
My boyfriend and I play video games together and when we're done we enjoy our time together ;) but honestly he sucks at most videogames so it's more of him trying, giving up and handing the controller over :P
MrBrightside21 20
51 - Your name fits perfectly for that comment.
xoxo_jackie 5
Por que no los dos?
InfinityMinus1 5
It takes too long!
MindFreakazoid 10
Thank you, 46, for that enlightening comment. Because now I want a taco. Gosh dangit.
BulldogHoops 14
60 sounds like a ******* wonderful girlfriend.
josiemorehouse 12
60 - DITTO!! Lol shame on this GF who would dare make her BF choose a brand new game over her!! Seriously?!? Game for 3-4 hrs, sexy time for 15 mins, game for 3-4 hrs!!! Really, that's what I would've done. My hubby knows when I get a new game, I'll be occupied, so he can wait his turn. Lol. Usually we're in separate rooms, playing our games, talking over XBL. When it's time for lovin', a simple "let's ****" comment is all that's needed. Pause the game, get our groove on, then back to assassinating bitches!! :D OP, you should be ashamed of yourself. Next thing you know she'll be making him choose watching the game over taking her to the mall. Poor BF!!!
BulldogHoops 14
Holy shit 147 sounds great too
Yourheadache 19
147. I agree its the same with my husband.
mvc3ftw 17
Why is it so hard to find women like 147 & 60 where I live?*cries*
Ukeee_X 19
Why not zoiberg?
shadowdragon1 1
17 I was going to say both
Jaxx66 21
I think it's mostly normal now for gamer guys to have gamer girlfriends. I mean, my bf and I have been together 8 years. We shoot zombies on the Xbox (I always get the shotgun...) we have sex, then we make our 9pm raid for Mists of Pandaria. I raid lead and he's my tank. I think now couples are closer and have more quality time together because of that option of sharing the same likes. And if I don't like his preference in game, I'll play for a bit to appease him, (yes I will try my best and not do it half assed.. That's just stupid) and he compromises and plays my RPG's. No big deal. Women like OP are the type to complain that they aren't getting enough attention. Their man is spending too much time on his game and doesn't listen to her while he plays. Boohoo. He probably plays for two/three hours a day, and sometimes it does take concentration! Nobody can give or have someone's constant attention. Also; I hope OP's bf picked the game. Especially if it was new and he just got it that day. She should know how it is to wait to have something, excitement building, then finally obtain it. You want to play with the damn thing!
Isoldael 27
The way I read the FML, OP just asked him how he wanted to spend the night - a night of sex or a night of gaming. Apparently she wanted more than just a quickie before he got back to gaming. That would also explain why they couldn't do both ^^
FizzyApple 3
I would just start moving down on him and then he wouldn't really have a choice!
Harpy20 24
Easy: have sex first, then go game. It gives you time to regenerate for more sex after games. My husband and I do it all the time. We even break for quickies sometimes. Just the perks of the gamer relationship.
RoperGirl203 9
Bwuahaha 147, you need to meet my brother xD he would appreciate your logic lmao way to be a ******* boss(;
missababgaga 19
Here's a solution... give him both!
Rosie_Posie43 12
Cue the Mexican music
PierceTheEman 4
I love you for that.
YoungMisfit 9
Every man now has a boner for you.
Inheritance 10
Not his fault Conner is a complete badass!
spazz666 18
As a gamer I feel like I should point out that I don't see how this would be possible. It's either sex first and no cuddle time which would leave her unhappy (or him in my case), sex while playing, which would NOT happen, gotta focus on dem video games, or sex after and she would probably fall asleep before he was done playing for the night. Therefore, I don't think both would be a choice.
SammyS2012 21
What about after the girl falls asleep? Sex, cuddle, play. ---> Man Sex, cuddle, sleep. ---> Woman I think it's a fair deal.
VBjew 3
I don't know man... This is a taping one considering my girlfriend would fight me over who gets to play.
EmoSunshine14 2
AT THE SAME TIME!
fenixtorador1 11
I love the way #3 thinks!
Marineman5 6
Your perfect.
Dramori 29
Doggy style so he can play while during sex, he'll be concentrating on the game so may even last longer than normal! :)
raycj 1
Why not do both?
tabbycat2007 22
2 & 3 both covered this already. Maybe next time.
raycj 1
Yea as i was typing it 2&3 weren't posted yet so maybe next time mind your own business. Thanks.
thatfrenchguy 8
The sass is overflowing here
MrSassypants 34
The sass is only flowing over a little bit.
gc327072 31
59 would know, after all.
spazz666 18
Lol "mind your own business" ... Honey, once you post something on a public website, it becomes everyone's business. You sound absolutely childish in this comment. Grow up please.
raycj 1
And your profile makes you sound like a loser.
LolPieRofl 11
Raycj stop being a douche and go sit in the corner.
syley 5
Your comments make you sound like a jerk
olpally 33
76- you're only 17, maybe you should grow up first before talking smack. If you're under 21, you haven't lived long enough to say things like "grow up" when you're a baby yourself. I realize I sound like an ass, but, as long my point gets across, that's all that matters, enjoy the fml battle royal
Airman1988 9
Wow that's just a little too obsessive, I'm a gamer myself but if those options presented themselves the game would remain unused.
ttyler333 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Yeah because you can't get a girl
gracehi 33
With an attitude like that, I'd be willing to bet you can't get one either.
Airman1988 9
ttyler333 I'll just have to let my fiance know about my failure to get a girl, she may be concerned, thanks for pointing out this personal failure that was just obviously spot on.
spazz666 18
18, are you daft? Didn't you learn to read? He said if an support unity like this arose the GAME would go unused. Thus meaning he would choose the sex. Please. A little wisdom, and a little less making me want to find a different planet to live on.
androiddestroya 7
In all honesty, rushing through the trees with the ease of a nightstalker and deliver the end of my tomahawk to the awaiting head of a redcoat to save my country could just as easily bring me to arousal and ****** as sex.
SettingSun89 5
Or perhaps he's not as desperate for sex?...
heart_aussie_fml 20
Why do you ask if you're afraid of the answer ?
loufol22 5
What?
newbiehere99 6
7 said, "Why would you ask if you're afraid of the answer ?"
newbiehere99 6
do* instead of would* sorry for my quotation mess up :(
poindexter25 5
The new assassins creed is awesome but sex would be better
TheLittlePug 3
He started crying over deciding whether to have sex or play a video game? Go get yourself a real man!
SkoomaKi 28
But it's Assassins Creed...
TheLittlePug 3
Doesn't matter what game it is. Time with your girlfriend should come first... I guess I'm the only one who thinks that :/
gracehi 33
14 video game obsessed losers thumbed you down.
SkoomaKi 28
#31 - Yes, you are the only person who thinks relationships come before gaming. Out of 7 billion people, the only one. And I totally wasn't joking. *pzzzt* Don't take me seriously.
BubbleGrunge 18
Personally, women who make a men choice between them and a video game are not women, they are little girls. There is no reason what so ever to make your significant other give up their hobby because you're feeling jealous you're not getting all their attention. As long as your boyfriend is spending quality time with you, there is NO reason to force them to choose between the two. Of course, OP could have given him sex THEN let him play his game; a win win situation for all!
russfml 31
Sometimes video games beat sex if your just not in the mood haha, but at the same time ya fyl
happle 21
57- I don't think she wanted him to give up video games, she just wanted to spend time with him. If I wanted to do something with my boyfriend, I know he'd put down his controller for cuddles any time.
etchsanity1 11
Yeah he wasn't putting the game first ... She was trying to play her own game of manipulating the poor guy, either way the game got chosen over the relationship the moment she made that statement video games are at least up front about being games she wasn't ;)
spazz666 18
32) What's wrong with playing video games? ACIII has a fantastic story line and graphics. I'd play it myself if my boyfriend hadn't ruined the ending for me...
gracehi 33
Guys, I seriously doubt OP expected her given choices to be a huge dilemma for her boyfriend, because any well adjusted person who loves his girlfriend would immediately choose his girlfriend over a video game with no thought. Given his reaction, he likely DOES neglect his girlfriend because he's addicted to a video game, which may be why she gave him a choice to either spend time with her OR play his video game. Had she let him have a both, I bet he would have ignored her all night while playing the game, and sex would either not happen at all, or be rushed, lacking in passion, tragically unsatisfying, and followed by him ignoring her while he plays his video game the rest of the night. And, yes, I do indeed speak from personal experience. I dumped the loser. OP's boyfriend better get his priorities straight or he will likely find himself single.
gracehi 33
81) There's absolutely nothing wrong with video games. I enjoy them myself. I, however, don't neglect my boyfriend or any of my other human relationships in favor of them. What's wrong is when people become addicted to them, or anything else for that matter, so that they miss out on real relationships and experiences. A choice between spending time with your girlfriend and playing a video game should be no choice at all. People should always come first in your life.
kalbrek009 20
You said it 85!
gracehi 33
149, read my subsequent comment. I never said that he should never have time to himself or play video games. His reaction here just tells me that he's overly obsessed with this game. A reasonable reaction, if he wanted to play his game, would be, "Do you think you could come over in a few hours? I just got this game and I'm really excited to play it!" If she thought that was unreasonable, then yes, she would be the one with issues.
ambear26 14
I think you are making it a big deal. I don't care if my boyfriend chooses video games (probably cause I play with him) but I'm not gonna get upset about it and I'm not gonna make him choose. If he wants alone time he will make it clear and if he just wants time to play then let him. Now if he spends to much time playing just talk to him about it and he should understand.
FaygoAndMiracles 18
You know, just because he couldn't decide doesn't mean he didn't want to spend time with his girlfriend. I bet if she asked, she could play Assassin's Creed with him.
RealReasons 0
Never an easy choice...
TurquoiseJesus 15
It wouldn't be an easy choice if the option was like halo or call of duty, or a mid-tier game, but assassins creed? That's a no-brainer.
FrozenIceHawk 7
Says the person with a MLP picture...
MrAwesomeSauce 6
Hey, thats a tough choice.