Today, I gave my husband an ultimatum: either he could have sex with me or play Minecraft. Needless to say, he spent the rest of the evening playing Minecraft. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I shoved my tits in my boyfriend's face, but he chose to continue playing Minecraft. FML
Today, my husband told me that he is done having sex because it eats up his online gaming time. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML
Today, I was having some rare good sex with my husband, when he suddenly said, "I'm fuckin' BORED," and pulled out so he could go play his video games. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML
Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML
Today, my husband decided he'd rather jerk off to the Wii Fit trainer than have sex with me. FML
Today, my spouse made it clear that they would rather play video games than be intimate with me. I've tried everything, but get nothing. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. All of the sudden, he whispered in my ear, "Do you want to hear a Minecraft joke?" FML
Today, I promised my husband "unlimited butthole access" if he'd get off his video games and help me with my homework. He pointed out that this was the fourth time I'd promised him that, and that since I never followed through the last three times, he wouldn't be doing a thing. Well, shit. FML
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Top comments
Antoine_Dodson 0
Correction: he's a creeper.
XplicitJesus 4
im guessing you havent either?
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Comments (424)
mandywaffles 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
He's a keeper.
XplicitJesus 4
i dont blame him
Ryan0510 0
Well whats better then building a virtual world?
JacksonCampbell 9
No other 8-bit game can even compare to Minecraft.
Antoine_Dodson 0
Correction: he's a creeper.
RebornProblem 0
MineCraft is an awesome game. I don't blame him.
urdirtyolduncle 15
I guess he'd rather make a journey into a virtual mine than yours, OP.
falconcadet 0
more like a creeper!
toastyjustice 5
There are many tough choices in life, this was not one of them. MINECRAFT ALL THE WAY!
CoconutMuffin 5
1- Is that Sasha Peirterese (spelling is off?) from Pretty Little Liars.
6joe9 0
wow what a nerd !
hiloman500 0
cockblocked by notch.. ouch
steveakafranxy 7
#69 stfu, minecraft rules
Melvar_10 3
If my gf were playing minecraft and I wanted to do her, I'd just eat her out or something and she would die by a creeper, give up, and we'd do our own mining and crafting
iamfunny 0
well old mcdonald just wanted to sit around playing minecraft instead if do his wife, and now he lives alone on a farm with singing animals
fuzzypurple9 0
I like your profile pic :) best band ever
everyday_normal_ 0
MC is the best game eva
kill3rs 0
if u play minecraft play on this server BeastsMC.hopto.org
shannonreneee 11
I'd hand cuff him and do what I want. His game can get stuffed.
blackop79 7
wrong, he's a creeper.... you'll know if you played minecraft
freddyisepic 2
haha 83
Slythrr 0
you must suck?? idk what to say here
jguglie110 3
sounds fun
mandywaffles 0
67- it is :)
Sydknee 8
ultimatums are dumb and selfish. anyways, he sure showed your a$$. Mincraft rules
zendaddy0 0
start a server with him that will really make him happy
Redneck42 0
well next time he wants to have sex tell him your to busy watching dr. Phil and see how he feels.
6joe9 0
#85 you stfu SEX rules !!
LordLiam316 0
253 - have you played minecraft?! I don't think there's a single person that has played it and not loved it. In minecraft you can mine til lava and bedrock, but if you're in a chicks cave and you see lava gtfo and stay out of there til her periods over :/
6joe9 0
#263 have you done sex ? well i dont think so !
Discombobulated9 12
#253 I agree with you. I love Minecraft, but if sex or a general 'life' is on the table, I'd take that over minecraft any day. Sorry Minecraft lovers, the truth hurts sometimes.
kmckeex32 0
you can hand cuff me and do what you want...
KYCats95 5
i can hear it now on Bob and Tom: Time now for the man who would rather play Minecraft than have sex.
infinite_chris 0
handcuffs? yum!
shanemc1991 0
**** yeah minecraft!!
shanemc1991 0
Chris?
jake2229510 2
He's actually a creeper :0
ekhballer 0
touche
audstarful 0
Is your husband Junkyard129?
TumblrAndStuff 14
#23 That was perfect xD
Wolfipoo 31
Minecraft isn't 8 bit buddy just so you know.
Jamber88 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
What a dick.
amadais 1
u obviously havent played before
YacL 15
I should Google Minecraft now, I'm curious. Anyways, OP, you gave him a choice and he chose. Maybe he just wasn't up for sex.
CaptainPickles72 18
76- He probably said no to spite her. Even if he wanted sex he still probably wanted to play Minecraft and if he caved now she would probably use getting sex as a weapon to get her way all the time. So I think he made the right decision!
TheObnoxiousNarw 1
145 is right. And Minecraft is really fun. I don't blame him.
Bizenghastly 0
#3- ops not a dick,his gf is kinda a bitch. why couldn't she just hang out w him for a while until he felt like sex? seriously, even if she wasn't really interested in it if she truly cared about him she could at least humor op and spend some time enjoying his company rather just his dick, no? ^_^
iTerrorized 4
moonradar.net join my minecraft server :D
maz_irken 6
well, minecraft IS pretty awesome....
Drigr 9
it's seems women complain on here when their men only want sex. they ALSO complain when their men DON'T want sex. it's kinda like if we lie we are ass holes, if we tell the truth, we are ass holes...
Screwie 25
Op, hug a creeper, they're your best friends!
YacL 15
208- Women will do anything and everything to get a man in trouble with her. Well, MOST women will, not all of them. There are women that are understanding and things like that.
chiddy_bang71 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
you've obviously never played minecraft.
staceysgenesis16 0
im guessing youve never had sex ?lol
XplicitJesus 4
im guessing you havent either?
Epilepsy_fml 0
^ They call me one stroke wonder..... because I am really good at golf.
chiddy_bang71 0
haha I don't really play minecraft. I just said it for the joke. and no I havnt had sex. but I'm 14 so no big deal. what's ur excuse?
daysgoby902 6
I know for a fact that's not true. I wish it was thought. =
chiddy_bang71 0
36 are you talking to me?
CitrusGirl 0
Minecraft is fun but not THAT fun. Now if it was Portal we were talking about... then I would understand.
falluke17 0
pussy
KiddNYC1O 22
10- I'm guessing you've had plenty right before your sweet sixteen. Daddy's so proud! See, assumption with part sarcasm. =D /sarcasm
Daviddwd 0
compare the two.
ritbbehindu 0
now world of warcraft.....you know you need that new gear.....
Xr70r7 4
Minecraft is the shit!
gcmest4ever 1
you are so right.
dabo_fml 0
portal sucks
Captain_Zorro 7
i was just playing minecraft a few minuites ago, but i would take sex over it ALMOST every day
bombermanpyr 0
maybe this was the exception to your "almost any day" theory SYNTAX ERROR: 438
starwarsguy330 0
HELLA YES
CitrusGirl 0
If you think portal sucks it's probably because you're too dumb to figure it out.
staceysgenesis16 0
yes 88 he was very proud especially siitting in hs jail cell. and i know it was a joke i was just kidding as well. thx :)
GetOwnedPuppy 0
LOL
jmar411 12
you realize that portal and minecraft are different games right? btw, portal is AWESOME!
CitrusGirl 0
I know they're different. I've played minecraft before and enjoyed it. But my games of choice have puzzles/mazes (Portal & Mirrors Edge) or interesting stories (Fallout, Elder Scrolls series, Assassins Creed).
bobateme 0
Aaand youve never played Minecraft. Seriously, sex is one of the few things that can motivate me to stop playing Minecraft.
almighty_zer 5
at least he's not hooked on Terraria
Shadow2ggah 0
I feel for OP but I read this comment and it made me giggle.
OnlyStrife 2
I second that
KsiHalfSquatch 0
YOU ARE MY ******* HERO!
lulzSHUTUP 0
MINECRAFT ALL THE WAY. Beta1.6 is out and I can't stop playing I don't blame him.
austin0023 0
haha
wweasel 0
If you played minecraft you would understand.
bradog9 0
win
SPAZTIK_CHILLI 0
go on www.thunderrift.net
sweetnlow15 5
#4 Obviously
CobaltPulse 2
I agree, maybe he should buy you an account?
footcheezeez 16
Douche.
SoccerForTheWin 5
I see what you did there
aisthecoolest 8
139 I agree but that's cause I've never been laid..... I am only 15 though....
Triangle6757 9
Terraria's better
whiteboy7thst 2
I think you should sell his computer on eBay and use the money to hire a hooker to have sex with.
alstbv12 13
whiteboy7thst fanboy eh?
falconcadet 0
hey whiteboy love your vids. question, are you still on jx23s server?
MrSassypants 34
53 it might not be him. I saw other people pose as other YouTube celebrities. It might be him though or might be a fanboy. Or a fangirl... meow! JK... not really... (=^_^=)
FMLandurstoo 9
He's a fanboy
ivizzle2 0
smd you're comments are on all the recents and they're all stupid
ivizzle2 0
jk I luv u
eric22446690 0
hes not whiteboy if hes black
ovechkinisbeast 9
it's either a fanboy or a gold medal champion.
chaziztheman 0
lol, read his bio. it says :Funny thing is, I'm black
L_A_C_online 0
Never knew you were 16 WhiteBoy
EmoGiana 0
You can tell they will be together forever.
jmart110 0
Just jump his bones! Something is seriously wrong if he doesn't want to have with you!
smartguy13v 2
she could just be horrible.
XplicitJesus 4
or ugly. or fat. or a bitch.
the_huldra 1
Bitch minecraft is sick as hell, no one would ever choose your fat ass over minecraft.
parxxx 0
. . . mean
wolfgold2 20
Well bitch shouldn't be ****** with Minecraft
justanotherrando_fml 2
Maybe he likes minecraft more than your passion
goingsolo211 8
what a coinkydink. I was just playin that
DearLar 0
cockblocked !
salvorican 24
No this is the future for birth control
staceysgenesis16 0
ill have sex with you. to make him jealous.
ginga_ninja_9001 0
LESBIAN SEX! ;D
catrav77 0
.....
11jackson11 0
:) yeah...
angryoriental 0
again hot chi ca! and down with the bi ftw!
CheezIt62 0
I think it's a good idea!!!
sugrnspice 0
u in rancho San Diego ?
JoeMan13 0
I'll have sex with u too babe ;)