Today, feeling down and dejected because of the shitty weather and none of my friends or family wanting to spend time with me to feel loved I took my favorite stuffed animal and that says 'I love you' when you squeeze it. I squeezed it. Nothing happened. Even an inanimate object rejected me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML
Today, my dog showed me her latest kill. Too bad it was the stuffed animals my dead grandmother had given me as a child that had a lot of sentimental value to me. FML
Today, my little sister and I were reading a book together and out of nowhere, she said "I love you." My heart melted and I told her that I loved her too. Then she told me that she was talking to her stuffed animal, not me. FML
Today, I pretended to cry in front of my cat because she doesn't cuddle with me anymore. Yeah, I tried to guilt-trip my cat into loving me. FML
Today, while at Six Flags my boyfriend won a huge stuffed animal for me. After a whole day of carrying it around, when he dropped me off he told me that he wants the stuffed animal back. He just didn't want to carry it around all day. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a teddy bear keyring. I had to explain that although many grown women like cuddly toys, I don't. And even if I did, a filthy, soaking wet bear he found in a puddle on the street is not a nice gesture, despite his suggestion I can just wash it in the machine. FML
Today, I bought my dog an expensive plushie toy because I thought it would last longer than the cheap ones. He ignored it completely and spent two hours playing with the cardboard box it came in. FML
Today, a tarantula joined my stuffed animal collection in its drawer. It, unfortunately, wasn't stuffed. FML
Today, and for the past month, I'm so lonely that I fall asleep holding my teddy bear's paw for comfort. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I think teddy bears are THE most pointless and careless gift. He shyly gave me my birthday present afterwards. It was a carebear. FML
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Top comments
facingforeverr 0
change the batteries
PsychoMerk 0
Josh, sweetie, do you need a hug? :] because you seem awfully irritable 9_9
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Comments (161)
arb1513 0
I feel better when I make other people feel good, not the other way around
TheAbsentOne 0
Snickerdoodles wins. OP fails.
tokintot07 0
you're stupid. it's a ******* inanimate object of course it's going to reject you and not say anything back, moron
blastvortex 4
Perhaps there's a "solution" to your problem... more specifically, a "spirit." It will never judge you. It'll also leave you feeling nice and warm on the inside. :D Alternatively, there's always this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QqGsxwQpa_g
realggirl 0
Today, the weather was bad, everyone was busy, and my stuffed animal wouldn't work. FML Yeah, not an FML.
JayyAmazingg 0
Awwwww, Thats Sadd/:
mattmag 0
Stop complaining and go play in the snow. Do you know how excited we'd be if it snowed here in Florida?
El_Pwnzor 0
#105 It's funny how people who live in Florida think that they will actually LIKE the cold, you don't see old people from Florida moving up to get the snow :P
HelloiamBatman 0
ананананнананн #19! тнis really is paтнеdic тно..
gman79 0
you sound like a wet blanket no wonder no one likes you
Starjell 0
poor u
Your_Dad 0
Ugh. Grow the **** up. There are starving puppies drowning in a river.